Zara's Wolf (Book 1 of the Zara's Wolf Trilogy) BWWM

31. Love + Joy

I just stare at him as he grins up at me.

“Wait there, I’ll be right up,” he says before he hurries to the front door.

I pull back from the railing, feeling light-headed as my heartbeat intensifies.

Sit down, before you fall down, I order myself.

Turning, I sit down stiffly at the edge of my seat, trying to slow the racing of my pulse as I wait for Evan to come.

When he steps out onto the balcony with that cheeky grin on his face, I can’t help but rise to my feet. Heat radiates through me and his smile quickly fades as he holds his hands up.

“Calm down, Zara,” he says. “I’m happy to see you too, but we gotta keep our cool out here.”

I pause, taking a deep breath. He relaxes, but I wrap my arms around him a split second later. Before I know it, tears are spilling down my cheeks and my body is shuddering.

His arms wrap around me and he sighs into my hair. “It’s okay.”

I shake my head and take a shaky breath. Sniffling, I pull back, wiping my cheeks on my arms like a kid. I purse my lips as my eyes glance back at my chair. There’s an empty one across from the little patio table for him to sit in.

“Can we talk now?” he asks.

I’m nodding vigorously before he can even finish asking.

He takes his seat as I tentatively take mine. I stare at my chai latte, steam still seeping out of the little nozzle. I can feel his eyes on me, but I don’t know where to begin.

Clearing my throat, I figure it’s best to clear my conscious first. “I’m sorry,” I say in a low voice. “You were right. I’m not ready to accept what I am. I’m a danger to everyone here, but,” I hesitate, glancing up to look into his golden eyes, “The truth is more complex.”

I reach for my latte, willing that the warm liquid would give me more strength.

“What is it?” he asks, his voice laced with concern.

Swallowing as I put the cup back on the table, my hands wrapped around it like a sleeve, I say, “I only just found out yesterday that I’m adopted.”

He swears under his breath, and apologizes for not knowing.

I shake my head. “Nothing you can do about it, but it makes sense now. My parents are normal people, and knew about me being able to shift, but they tried to control it through prescription drugs.”

“Seriously?”

Nodding, I hesitate. “They were scared and didn’t know what to do. They found a drug that worked though. All this time, I thought I was taking something for my migraines, but it was my inner wolf that I was suppressing.”

I sigh as he swears again. “That explains it,” he says, brushing his fingers through his hair. “So, something must have set you off at the club, huh?”

Nodding again, I drum my fingers on the cup. “I was so angry that they kept the truth from me, but I understand too. They love me and were worried about me being discovered. So I can’t blame them. Now that I know though,” I pause, pressing my lips firmly together again, “I can’t deny it anymore. I won’t live a lie. I’m just going to have to accept it and stop taking the pills.”

“I agree,” he adds, “and I’m glad that you’ve come to this realization, but I think while you’re here in the city, you should keep taking those pills until I can get you back out to the cabin. If they are helping to suppress your shifts, it’s safer for everyone that you keep taking them.”