More guilty 9

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-LISA POV-

IM done cooking . I said na magpapahanda ako ng bfast pero bigla kong naisip na ako nalang ang mag luluto para kay jennie.
Doble doble and bigat at kunsensya na nararamdaman at dala dala ko ngayon .
Hindi ko alam kung paano to bibitbitin .
Hinusgahan ko si jennie agad .
After kong malaman ang kwento tungkol sakanya.  Nakaramdam ako ng guilty .
At after nyang sabihin ang lahat kanina .
Kung bakit nya ginagawa yun.  At kung bakit nya tinanggap ang ofer ni dad na kasal . Mas lalo pa akong naguilty .
And more guilty dahil sa ginawa ko sakanya .

"shit.  Hindi ko lang sya sinaktan emotional.  Pati physical.. Pinag samantalahan ko pa sya. And just to get what i want . Nagawa kong pisikalin sya?  Oh  Damn ! Im so stupid.  How am i change into devil . Fuck" i talk to myself .

When im about to leave to call her .
Im startled dahil bigla syang pumasok sa kitchen .

"j-jennie?" i stuterd

She look down and can't even look at me .
"damn.  She's realy scared of me"

"ah.  Um.  G-gutom ka na? I-i cook . Lets eat" i stuterd .
I try to approched her but she move backward and look at me with her teary eye

"fuck " i thought .
She's realy scared of me.  She's realy scared i can see it in her eyes. . And its break my heart into pieces .
I sigh .

"look jennie.  Im sory.  But please trust me now.  Im not going to hurt you again. Promise" i sencerily said

She look at me

"please?" i look at her with a beg look .
I slowly approched her and hold her hand.

I let her to sit on the chair at nilagyan ko sya ng pagkain sa pinggan.

...

While eating . Im just staring at her.
Then suddenly i feel thats she's uncomfortable so i look away and cleard my throat . Then i look at her again and speak .

"im sory jennie"

She look at me

"i--" i take a deep breath 
"im sory for everything.  For . . .judging you . Im sory for what i said . . Im sory for . . For ahm . . Im sory dahil pinag samantalahan kita last last night . 
Sory for the slap and punched.  And slap and punched again"
I try to say sory by everything i did . I take a deep breath bfore speak again .
"im sory for forcing you last night . Sory sa pang babastos . Sory.  Sory. 
And believe it or not.  I stop last night. I didn't raped you again.  I stop and let you sleep" i look down "hindi kita dapat hinusgahan agad agad . And im sory for that jennie"

She just nod and give me a slight smile

"im sory again . But to be honest.  I still don't like you for my father"

"i-i understand" she said

"i mean . Ayoko na talagang mag asawa si dad . Bcos i promise to my mom na hinding hindi ako papayag na may papalit sakanya sa pwesto nya bilang mother ko.  And isa pa . Halos kaidad lang kita so its realy awkward"

Jennie sigh

"but yeah.  Wala na akong magagawa . Nandyan na yan" i said

"im sory" she speak

"hey.  Don't say sory.  Its okay . Baka masanay din ako na yung step mother ko.  Matanda lang ng dalawang taon sakin"

She nod and stood up

"done?" i ask and she nod

"s-sige.  Pahinga ka na.  Ako na dito. And i planing to visit my friend.  Are you okay to be here alone?" i ask

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