Off Limits.

Part 2: Her

Fuck. What was I doing?
I reprimanded myself as I watched the tall stranger get in my car with me. I suddenly sobered to my surroundings. I had let a stranger into my car and I didn't even know his name. In the warmth of my car I could see him more easily. He had turned on the car heating, first turning the plastic grate towards me, the action not going unnoticed by me.
What if he was a pervert? Or even worse a serial killer?
"Serial killers don't usually make sure their victims are warm. I think they just kill them."
He looked over at me and I felt my cheeks grow red. Fuck. I don't think I've ever blushed since William's death.
William. My husband. My dead husband. I twisted my cold wedding ring around my finger, a physical reminder of him and a stark contrast to my warm cheeks.
This was the first time I'd been alone with a man who wasn't my family since he died. It should've felt wrong to be sitting with the stranger in my car but it didn't. I clearly hadn't thought this through and I couldn't turn him away either, the rain was getting heavier by the second.
I cleared my throat and ignored him.
"What's your name?"
"Adrian."
My brows furrowed. "No surname?"
"It's just Adrian."
I pursed my lips. "Oh."
We fell silent and I tuned in to the sound of the rain outside. I felt comfortable with him. Adrian. His name suited him. I glanced at him in the rear view mirror, unconsciously comparing him to William. Adrian was probably arrogant. I bet he forced his reflection upon every mirror he crossed paths with, forcing it to show his features. William wasn't like that, he had always been ignorant of the female attention he attracted all through college and high school.
This time, Adrian started the conversation. "Let's play 21 questions. I'll start. What's a really bad joke you know?"
William also hadn't been so dominating. Adrian however had no problem starting this game without my consent. His eyes were trained on me and I answered.
"I don't know. Why didn't you start with the normal questions like what's my name or age?"
Adrian shrugged his shoulders. "Why ask the boring questions? I want to know things no one else knows about you, you know keep it interesting."
"I pegged you as the kind of guy to ask me my bra size or my body count. Not a bad joke."  I sat straighter in my seat. "Ok humor me. What's your worst joke?"
Adrian smiled. "If I get you to smile at my joke, you have to buy me a coffee because I'm cold."
"You're on." I have never laughed at a dumb joke before and I certainly knew I wasn't going to let Adrian have me beat.
He blew on his palms, warming them by the heater before continuing. "What's the best thing about Switzerland?"
Adrian paused for dramatic effect and I frowned impatiently. "Well the flag is a big plus."
"That was one of the worst jokes I've ever heard. Please don't tell me you're a comedian." I felt annoyed that I was amused by his stupid joke and I knew he saw my lips curl up.
"You owe me a coffee." Adrian looked at me, smiling again like a child and this time I couldn't help but join in. His smile was infectious.
"So let's go." He tilted his head towards town.
"What now? We are both soaking wet, I don't think we could walk into any cafe like this."
"We'll dry as we get closer to the cafe. I know a nice one about 10 minutes away and look the heater's on full blast."
I don't know why I felt compelled to agree with him but I knew a promise was a promise so I turned my keys into my ignition, hearing the soothing sound of the engine humming before following his directions.
I was totally mad to follow a stranger's directions towards an area I'd never heard of but my gut instinct told me I could trust him.
*****
Adrian was infuriatingly right. By the time we reached the quaint cafe, our clothes were dry and the coffee was amazing. He didn't let me pay after all, saying that I'd already done enough anyway by letting him dry in my car. So I was determined to leave the waitress a tip instead before we left.
I liked Adrian's company, I realised as a blew on my coffee watching the tendrils on smoke rise from the porcelain cup. He didn't know much of my past; except the parts I told him and even so didn't look at me with pity or treat me different.
"So you never told me your name." I looked up from my coffee mug and at the man in front of me.
"Sonam."
"No surname?" He enquired, repeating my question from earlier.
I gave him a wry smile, I didn't want him to know my full story just yet. "Just Sonam." I changed the subject before he could probe me for more information.
"We never finished our game of 21 questions." He understood my sudden urge to change the topic so he played along.
"Shall I ask you boring questions or interesting ones?"
I took a sip of my coffee. "Both."
"Tell me an embarrassing story."
"Alright." I nursed the warm coffee cup between my hands. "Promise not to laugh."
"Pinky promise." He held out his pinky and I did the same.
"In med school, I went to weekly seminars. I had a crush on the boy who sat in front of me and when we became partners in a group project, he recognized me from high school. That whole hour I could barely function. I always had a crush on him through high school but he was in the year above and in the football team- our paths had never crossed. I ended up doing my half of the project in silence which he kept trying to fill asking me about our old teachers and I was too embarrassed to speak I just nodded and ugh- I thought I had blown it but he still talked to me after that."
Adrian stared at me, he wasn't laughing or mocking me but intently listening.
I carried on. "So anyway, later one of my friends told me that he was part of Christian union and my dumb ass joined even though I'm an atheist. I spent the whole damn night reading the Bible and on the internet, waking up at six AM to eat biscuits and talk about God, and act like I was "curious" about "philosophy of religion," when it was actually just an extra hour I got to spend trying to make eye contact with him." Before Adrian could reply, I spoke in my own defense, "I wasn't the only girl there, apparently half my year had also decided to turn into devout christians in honor of William joining.

William. The whole situation with Adrian felt a bit suffocating for me right now.
Adrian must have noticed my sudden mood change and tried to reassuringly place his hand on mine when it actually had the opposite effect. This felt like a date. Like I was cheating on William. Actually I don't even know what this was but I didn't feel too good anymore. I visible recoiled moving his hand from mine. I fished a few crumpled dollar bills from my bag and left my half finished coffee on the table.
"I'm sorry, I have to go somewhere, I'm really late. Catch you later?"
I didn't even wait for his response and grabbed my coat before leaving. I smiled at the waitress, Anna, before leaving to sit in my car. I locked the doors and put my seatbelt on. I hadn't realized that through all this I hasn't even taken a deep breath. I exhaled sharply, resting my forehead on the cool wheel of my car before recollecting myself.
What was wrong with me? I had just mentioned William's name and fallen apart in from of a complete stranger who probably thought I was crazy. Then, I left him stranded in a cafe.
Adrian. I had literally forgotten Adrian and stood him in front of other customers in the coffee shop. God. He must have been so embarrassed.
I got out of my car, into the cafe but Adrian had long gone. At our table two girls my age were laughing over a stack of pancakes doused in maple syrup.
I turned to see the blonde waitress from before standing behind me, Anna.
"He left a few minutes ago you just missed him."
"Does he come here often?"
Anna nodded. "I could pass a message if you want."
I smiled, hopefully looking grateful. I wrote my number on her pad of paper that she presumably used to take orders and a short apology to Adrian. I handed it back to her.
"Thank you so much."
She folded the paper and placed it behind the counter. "He was worried about you, said it was too forward to leave his number behind." Anna's lips curved into a professional smile and I nodded in response watching her leave to wait on a new customer.
I was a mess.