I've never really been able to remember anything from when i was little
I remember being in my head all the time,
Thinking about all the things I didn't have but so badly longed for,
I remember the fear when I couldn't decipher reality from my dreams
Me and my sister were talking one time and I brought up something from when I was little, she gave me the weirdest look and said that it had never happened.
I was so confused because I could picture it so clearly in my head. But if I look closely enough, the colors were all a little too bright, everything a little too perfect. I cried when i realized that it had never actually happened
My memories aren't real
They are all just an elaborate dream
A dream of the life that i wished i could have but never actually thought possible
I replaced the neglect and darkness with love and bright pretty colors
I shoved all the hurt down so far that I would never be able to find it
I search for answers knowing that there are none
I have nothing
Four years of what I thought I knew gone
like a whisper, so faint that you wonder if you ever even heard it at all