Misguided Ghosts | TREEBROS

•Chapter 9...•

Seeing the Murphy's became a routine, but each time Evan felt like the emails and the stories he told were real and the talks between Evan and Connor before bed got longer and more heartfelt. Overtime he, Alana, and Jared established 'The Connor Project', Jared pushed the idea since he was told 'the memory of Connor would fade away'. Although he didn't know the true reason why Evan was so shaken by that statement, he accepted that Ev agreed.

Days became monotonous, more emails and stories were posted constantly. Evan was growing tired and wanted to distance himself from the project completely. However, it was about Connor... so he could never give up on keeping the ghost around.

"Hey Ev?"

"Yes Con?" Evan responds, rubbing the tiredness from his eyes as he typed away at another email.

"You should really come over and lay by me," Connor said with a sly tone. Evan glanced over and blushed looking back to the screen.

"I-I... I-Alana really wants me to complete these emails for today's-"

"Evan... please turn it off and hang out with the real Connor," the ghost persisted. Evan looks to him and smiles, he never confessed to Connor... but they have gotten really close. Even if he could never confess he was fine being his friend.

Ev crawled towards Connor's ghostly form and lay back on his pillow, his stuff back cracking in the process. Connor winced at the sound, looking at his living friend with a slight smile.

"Get away from the little project Jared and Alana have set up and go do something fun for today okay? It's still early." Connor suggests, Ev shrugs.

"What is there to even do?"

"What about hoodie kid-uh... Michael! Have you met his boyfriend yet?" Connor asked, propping himself up on his elbows like a gossiping girl. Evan shakes his head, "text him! You need to hang out with more people than just me!"

"Why?"

The room goes silent, Evan doesn't retract his words he just looked down at his hand. Anxiously he rubs the creases in his palm, Connor looks at him with a shocked expression. Evan sighs and looks to him.

"I'll-"

The sound of a message on his phone caught his attention. Evan furrows his eyebrows and grabs it, Connor sighs.

"Evan put down the screen-"

"It's from Michael..." Evan interjects his body beginning to shake tears forming in his eyes, Con sits up and looks at the screen.

'Hey buddy... I saw Connors suicide note on T.C.P. site.... I'm so so sorry' the message read, Evan frantically scrolled faster until he saw who posted the note.

"A-Alana posted my suicide note,"

"Wh-Wait how did she get it?" Connor tenses, a little panicked. Evan shrugs knowing that the Murphy's were the only ones who had it, Evan's breathing becomes uneven and shallow. Connor noticing this, pulls Evan into his ethereal grasp for a comforting embrace.

"We'll figure this out..." Connor mutters, "I can't believe someone gave her my note-"

"Your note?" Evan mumbled pulling away from Connor, "Your note?! Connor, that was my note. My note that I wrote to my therapist because I was lying to people at schools saying that I broke my arm from falling-not jumping off of a tree to kill myself! It was my note for my sake. You didn't write a note, you just left all of us upset without saying goodbye... I never got a chance to tell you goodbye."

Evan quietly broke down as Connor stepped away looking askance, Ev knew that he just pushed Connor away.

"I did write a note"

Evan looked up to see Connor looking to his feet, his hands kept deeply in his black hoodie pockets. Evan wipes his eyes and gestured for Connor to continue.

"I left it hidden in my room in the space under my dresser drawer... go... go find it if that's what you want." Connor turned away, "hurry please..."

Evan quickly took up and ran out the door, his mother not home to question where he was going. Running down the road to the expensive house that belonged to the Murphy's, his mind raced with questions.

Why did Connor hide his suicide note?
...
Why is Connor not coming with him?
......
How did no one find it?
.........
Why didn't Connor tell him before?!

Evan stopped at the door, out of breath, but in a rush. The door opened as Cynthia greeted Evan at the door.

"Oh hey sweetie, did Zoey invite you over?" Cynthia asked with a smile.

"N-No... I think I left something in Connor's room last time I was here and I would like to get it." Evan bullshits an excuse, but Cynthia nods and let him in.

Not being suspicious he walked up the stairs and ran down the hall to Connor's vacant room. He glanced around, finding the large dresser pulling out every drawer frantically until he found a folded piece of dusty paper. Shaking off the dirt that accumulated and blowing away the rest. Connor's shakiest handwriting was revealed to him. Several words were scribbled out or erased sloppily as if the pills Connor took were already shaving off the little time he had left..

Dear everyone,
     I'm sorry... All I can say is that I'm sorry, I'm sick. I know I'm sick, and I hurt you all... I'm sorry for hurting everyone, I'm sorry for fighting I'm sorry   for everything. I wanted to get better but the way I was treating all of you on a daily basis... I can't handle what I've done... I'm sorry mom and Zoey for screaming at you all the time, and to dad for pretending he wasn't even there. And I'm sorry Evan for hurting you, I didn't mean to lash out... Evan I know this is too late to say this but I love you.
Sincerely, me.

Evan finished reading, tears unknowingly cascading down his cheeks. Silent cries echoed throughout the empty room as Evan's pleading screams rung out, "I love you" he felt that no matter how it hurt his longs he wasn't loud enough.

"I love you Connor... I'm so sorry I was such a coward! I just wish I could do it all over. I wish we could have the happy ending we deserve!" Evan stopped as footsteps approached the door-so he whispered.

"I wish you could get the ending you deserve..."

Evan was in bed, he leaned up and held his aching head in his hand.

"A nightmare?" He muttered, "Connor?" Evan looked around unable to see the ghost anywhere. He panicked and grabbed his phone seeing texts between him and Connor dated from an hour ago...

It was the night Connor killed himself.