𝑆𝑎𝑣𝑒 𝑚𝑒 [ 𝑀.𝑌𝐺 || 𝐵𝑇𝑆 ]

II Chapter One II

"Miss Han. Tell me something about you."

Everything was white.

Cold, loveless and just white. But I have to get used to it, because for the next few month this is going to be my new home. Without any emotions in my face, I was looking into the camcorder in front of me. I watched the small red flashing light, which signalled to me, that all my privacy had just been taken away from me. "Miss Han, if you don't wanna talk about you, then we can not help either.", the man said named Dr.Choi. I cocked my head briefly, looked at the camcorder, my my head up again straight and then took a look at the doctor.

"I'm Han Yuri, 19 years old, living in Seoul."

"A good start Yuri, and why are you with us?" My eyes darkened and frowned. An actually good question. Why am I here? Obviously, I'm not here because I wanted to, it's because of my parents. My parents wanted me to be cured, they easily decided just like everything in my life. "Because my parents easily robbed all of my rights of decision and my privacy.", I murmured, looking down on my pale bony hands.

"No Yuri that's wrong. Once again, why are you here?", Dr.Choi said softly but with a more certain undertone. I didn't want it at all. To be honest I didn't want anything here. I was forced to sit here in this small room and tell a stranger my biggest darkest fears. The fears, which I've be trying to displace for a long time.

"Because my parents...because I have bulimia and I'm way too skinny." I couldn't hold back my tears, no, that's a lie. I am not too skinny.

"Very good Yuri. Very good."

Dr.Choi got up from his chair and switched off the camcorder. He packed all his stuff together and got out of the room. I stared at the white wall. I felt nothing and everything.

Anger, Disappointment, Anxiety, Loneliness, Danger.

I was just sitting there. Alone.  

I was wearing a white shirt, that was at least 3 sizes too big for me, a black sweatpants and black socks. This morning was braided into a French braid by my mom. Before that she had cut about half of my beloved hair. Instead of long blond hair, my hair now touched just my shoulders.

A male nurse cam into the white room and led me to the ward, which was form now on my home. We walked past a glass wall; my parents kept walking away. They lay sobbing in each other's and didn't spend even a little sight at me. You could only hear my feet pounding through the corridor of the ward 7. We stopped in front of a room. The male nurse opened the door and entered. "The living and coming room. You'll spend most of the time here until you are picked up for your therapies or until the meals.", the male nurse explained in a rough voice, whereupon I nodded. He closed the glass door again and led me to a barren room, that looked like a prison cell. But to be honest the jail would have been more comfortable than this hell hole. The male nurse let me enter the room. What happened to my life? What are my parents doing to me?

"Here is your room. As you can see, your luggage arrived. At 3:00pm there is a general round of the complete group. Be on time." He said and slammed the door behind me. I sighed, sat down on my bed and looked around the room. Well I have never been on such a low pint in my life like now. Sent to an asylum because my parents think that I tried to kill myself and my little sister. That I tried to kill me with starving, that's just a pathetic way.

You are just pathetic and sick.

I barley lifted my heavy luggage onto my bed and opened it. The familiar smell crept into my nose and at least made me feel at home.  My carefully folded clothes found all their place in my new musty closet, which stood next to my bed. Well, you can't expect a luxury room in an old psychiatry. After I had cleared everything and refreshed myself, I opened the door and entered the bare hallway of the ward 7. The bright light of the old lamps flickered from time to time, the rest of the hallway was soaked in complete darkness. I walked slowly across the corridor to the common and living room, which was filled with a few people.