Inspirational Islamic Stories

Ramlah bint Abi Sufyan (ra)

Waraqah bin Nawfal, Uthman bin Huwayrith bin Asad, Zayd bin Amr bin Nafil and Ubaydullah bin Jahash were four friends who were disheartened by idol worship in Arabia. They used to get together and discuss this. One night they came to a decision to search the pure religion of Ibrahim (as) which was the straight path of righteousness. After meeting they moved in different directions to find the pure religion of the Prophet Ibrahim (as).
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Ubaydullah bin Jahash fell into doubts between truth and falsehood. He married the beautiful, intelligent and well-educated daughter of the Qurayshi chieftain, Abu Sufyan Sakhr bin Harb.
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It was around this time that Makkah was shaken by the news that Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) was rejecting all the idols. He invited people to worship Allah (ﷻ) and proclaimed he was His Last Prophet and Messenger. The Wise daughter of Abu Sufyan, Ramlah (ra), accepted Islam and so did her husband. His two brothers Abdullah bin Jahash and Abu Ahmad bin Jahash had also become Muslims. Her sisters, Zaynab bin Jahash and Hamnah bin Jahash too entered Islam. The former had joined the select group of the Mother of the Believers. The whole family was fortunate to have obeyed the call to Islam, but while in Abyssinia Ubaydullah had the misfortune to reject Islam after having accepted it.
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Abu Sufyan ibn Harb could not conceive of anyone among the Quraysh who would dare challenge his authority or go against his orders. He was after all, the sayyid or chieftain of Makkah who had to be obeyed and followed. His daughter, Ramlah (ra), known as Umm Habibah, however dared to challenge his authority when she rejected the deities of the Quraysh and their idolatrous ways. Besides his daughter Ramlah (ra), he had two sons, Yazid and Muawiyah. Together with her husband, Ubaydullah ibn Jahsh, she put her faith in Allah (ﷻ) alone and accepted the message of His Prophet Muhammad ibn Abdullah (ﷺ).
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Abu Sufyan tried with all the power and force at his disposal to bring back his daughter and her husband to his religion and the religion of their forefathers. But he did not succeed. The faith which was embedded in the heart of Ramlah (ra) was too strong to be uprooted by the hurricanes of Abu Sufyans fury.
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Abu Sufyan remained deeply worried and concerned by his daughter's acceptance of Islam. He did not know how to face the Quraysh after she had gone against his will and he was clearly powerless to prevent her from following Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ). When the Quraysh realized though that Abu Sufyan himself was enraged by Ramlah (ra) and her husband, they were emboldened to treat them harshly. They unleashed the full fury of their persecution against them to such a degree that life in Makkah became unbearable.
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Meanwhile, In the fifth year of his mission,  after surveying the situation the Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) decided that the staunch supporters of Islam had taken enough of the oppression from the Quraysh. They would have to migrate, and he ordered them to leave for Abyssinia, where the ruler was known for his kindness and hospitality to refugees from tyrannical rule.
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Ramlah (ra) and her husband were among the second group of migrants who left for Abyssinia. There Ramlah (ra) gave birth to a girl, Habibah so Ramlah (ra) was now known as Umm Habibah. The days passed swiftly for her as she kept busy seeing to the upbringing of her little daughter; and any free time was spent in prayer and meditation.
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Abu Sufyan and the Quraysh leaders found it difficult to accept that a group of Muslims had slipped out of their net of persecution and was enjoying the freedom to hold their beliefs and practice their religion in the land of the Negus. They therefore send messengers to the Negus to seek their extradition. The messengers tried to poison the mind of the Negus against the Muslims but after examining the Muslims beliefs and listening to the Quran being recited, the Negus concluded: "What has been revealed to your Prophet Muhammad and what Jesus the son of Mary preached came from the same source."
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The Negus himself announced his faith in the one true God and his acceptance of the prophethood of Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ). He also announced his determination to protect the Muslim muhajirin.
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The long journey on the road of hardship and tribulation had finally led to the oasis of serenity. So Umm Habibah felt. But she did not know that the new-found freedom and sense of peace were later to be shattered. She was to be put through a test of the most severe and harrowing kind.
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One night, it is related, as Umm Habibah was asleep she had a vision in which she saw her husband in the midst of a fathomless ocean covered by wave upon wave of darkness. He was in a most perilous situation. She woke up, frightened. But she did not wish to tell her husband or anyone else what she had seen. The day after that ominous night was not yet through when Ubaydallah ibn Jahsh announced his rejection of Islam and his acceptance of Christianity. What a terrible blow! Ramlah's (ra) sense of peace was shattered. She did not expect this of her husband who presented her forthwith with the choice of a divorce or of accepting Christianity. Then she told him about her dream, hoping that this at least would instill the fear of Allah (ﷻ) in his heart. But he was too far gone on the downward road; not only his face but his heart had been mutilated. Umm Habibah had three options before her. She could either remain with her husband and accept his call to become a Christian in which case she also would commit apostasy and - God forbid - deserve ignominy in this world and punishment in the hereafter. This was something she resolved she would never do even if she were subjected to the most horrible torture. Or, she could return to her father's house in Makkah - but she knew he remained a citadel of shirk and she would be forced to live under him, subdued and suppressing her faith. Or, she could stay alone in the land of the Negus as a displaced fugitive - without country, without family and without a supporter.
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She made the choice that she considered was the most pleasing to Allah (ﷻ). She made up her mind to stay in Abyssinia until such time as Allah (ﷻ) granted her relief. She divorced her husband who lived only a short while after becoming a Christian. He had given himself over to frequenting wine merchants and consuming alcohol, the "mother of evils". This undoubtedly helped to destroy him.
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Umm Habibah was relieved, of course, but what was she to do now, how was she to survive? Only two activities kept her occupied - the upbringing of her daughter and her prayers. She would sometimes get together with the other Muslim ladies in Abyssinia to talk of the latest developments. Ruqayyah, the daughter of the Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ), Asma bint Umays and Laylah bint Abi Hashmah were the great ladies with whom she would spend her free time. But these ladies too soon returned home. Still, there were other ladies with whom she was friendly and she would remain patient.
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Years passed and the map of the Islamic world changed and battles continued to be fought. The Treaty of Hudaybiyah was signed. One night while she was fast asleep, she dreamt someone called out to her, "Mother of the Believers". When she woke up she felt a great sense of not just happiness, but ecstasy. During the time, the Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) had migrated to Al-Madinah, and the first Islamic State had been established. Someone, while talking to him about the state of affairs in Abyssinia, mentioned that Umm Habibah, the daughter of a wealthy and noble family was living from hand to mouth. After the husband had recanted and died, and she was living under tragic circumstances.
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One morning bright and early, there was a loud knocking on her door. It was Abrahah, the special maid-servant of the Negus. Abrahah was beaming with joy as she greeted Umm Habibah and said: "The Negus sends his greetings and says to you that Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ), the Messenger of Allah (ﷻ), wants you to marry him and that he has sent a letter in which he has appointed him as his wakil to contract the marriage between you and him. If you agree, you are to appoint a wakil to act on your behalf."
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Umm Habibah was in the clouds with happiness. She shouted to herself: "Allah (ﷻ) has given you glad tidings. Allah (ﷻ) has given you glad tidings."
She took off her jewelry- her necklace and bracelets - and gave them to Abrahah. She took off her rings too and gave them to her. And indeed if she had possessed all the treasures of the world, she would have given them to Abrahah at that moment of sheer joy.
Finally she said to Abrahah: "I appoint Khalid ibn Said ibn al-Aas (relative from the tribe of Quraish) to act as wakil on my behalf for he is the closest person to me."
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In the palace of the Negus, set in the midst of beautiful gardens and luxuriant vegetation and in one of the lavishly decorated, sumptuously furnished and brightly lit halls, the group of Muslims living in Abyssinia gathered. They included Jafar ibn Abi Talib, Khalid ibn Said, Abdullah ibn Hudhafah as-Sahmi and others. They had gathered to witness the conclusion of the marriage contract between Umm Habibah, the daughter of Abu Sufyan, and Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ), the Messenger of Allah (ﷻ).
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Then Umm Habibah's representative, Khalid bin Sa'id bin 'Aas, read the marriage vows and said: ''All Praise is for Allah (ﷻ), and I praise Him, seek His help and ask His forgiveness. I bear witness that None has the right to be worshipped but Allah (ﷻ) and Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) is His Servant and His Messenger, to whom He has sent with true Religion and a guidance to the Right Path to overpower His Religion over all the false religions though the polytheists will not like it. I have accepted the proposal of the Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) and married Umm Habibah bint Abu Sufyan to him. May Allah bless this marriage and make it fruitful for Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ)."
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When the marriage was finalized, the Negus addressed the gathering: "I praise Allah (ﷻ), the Holy, and I declare that there is no god but Allah (ﷻ) and that Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) is His Servant and His Messenger and that He gave the good tidings to Jesus the son of Mary. Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) has requested me to conclude the marriage contract between him and Umm Habibah, the daughter of Abu Sufyan. I agreed to do what he requested and on his behalf I give her a mahr or dowry of four hundred gold dinars."
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He handed over the amount to Khalid ibn Said who stood up and said: "All praise is due to Allah (ﷻ). I praise Him and seek His help and forgiveness and I turn to Him in repentance. I declare that Muhammad is His servant and His Messenger whom He has sent with the religion of guidance and truth so that it might prevail over all other forms of religion even if the disbelievers were to dislike this. I have agreed to do what the Prophet, peace be upon him, has requested and acted as the wakil on behalf of Umm Habibah, the daughter of Abu Sufyan. May God bless His Messenger and his wife. Congratulations to Umm Habibah on account of the goodness which God has ordained for her."
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Khalid took the mahr and handed it over to Umm Habibah. The Sahabah thereupon got up and prepared to leave but the Negus said to them: "Sit down for it is the practice of the Prophets to serve food at marriages."
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Umm Habiba married the Prophet in 1 AH, although she did not actually come to live with him in Madina until 7 AH, when the Prophet was sixty years old and she was thirty five.
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There was general rejoicing at the court of the Negus as the guests sat down again to eat and celebrate the joyous occasion. Umm Habibah especially could hardly believe her good fortune and she later described how she was eager to share her happiness.
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She said: "When I received the money as mahr, I sent fifty mithqals of gold to Abrahah who had brought me the good news and I said to her: 'I gave you what I did when you gave me the good news because at that time I did not have any money.'
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Shortly afterwards, Abrahah came to me and returned the gold. She also produced a case which contained the necklace I had given to her. She returned that to me and said: 'The King has instructed me not to take anything from you and he commanded the women in his household to present you with gifts of perfume.'
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On the following day, she brought me ambergris, safron and aloes and said: 'I have a favor to ask of you.'
'What is it?' I asked.
'I have accepted Islam ,' she said,
'and now follow the religion of Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ). Convey to him my salutation of peace and let him know that I believe in Allah and His Prophet. Please don't forget.'
She then helped me to get ready for my journey to the Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ).
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When I met the Prophet, peace be on him, I told him all about the arrangements that were made for the marriage and about my relationship with Abrahah. I told him she had become a Muslim and conveyed to him her greetings of peace. He was filled with joy at the news and said: 'Wa alayha as-salam wa rahmatullahi was barakatuhu and on her be peace and the mercy and blessings of Allah (ﷻ)."
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Abu Sufyan heard about his daughter's marriage and he expressed happiness in spite of the fact that he had not yet accepted Islam. He said the Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) was the youth who would never lose face, and always be honored.
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When the Quraysh broke the Treaty of Hudaybiyah, Abu Sufyan came to Al-Madinah to renew the treaty. He visited his daughter; just as he was about to sit down Umm Habibah quickly stepped forward and rolled up the light mattress which was spread out. He was surprised and asked her if he was not worthy of the mattress, or the mattress was not worthy of him. She replied that actually it was a mattress used by a very pure and clean Prophet, and no idol worshipper could sit on it, as he was unclean.
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She had therefore rolled it up and put it out of his way. Abu Sufyan was very embarrassed and said she had forgotten her manners since moving away from him. She answered that the manners of Islam had taught her different values and cleanliness had a different meaning for her now. Since he was not familiar with these concepts he was offended. She said I was thankful that Allah (ﷻ) guided me to the path of Islam. I was surprised that my father, in spite of being an important chieftain of one of the leading tribes of the Quraysh, had not yet accepted Islam.
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He was in a lofty position by worldly standards, but as far as the norms of a rational religion were concerned, he was really backward. How could he possibly worship a piece of stone that was both blind and deaf, could neither respond to his prayers nor reject them. Abu Sufyan was not happy with what his daughter told him. He asked her how he could possibly, at this stage, turn his back on a religion his forefathers had followed from generations and left his daughter's house.
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It was the earnest desire of Umm Habibah that her father and brother should come into the fold of Islam and earn the reward of a blessed Paradise. She did not want them to pass away from this world in a state of disbelief like Abu Jahl, Walid bin Al-Mughirah, 'Aas bin Wa'il, 'Utbah bin Rabi'ah and Shaybah bin Rabi'ah. On the occasion of the conquest of Makkah, when Abu Sufyan and Mu'awiyah pledged allegiance to Allah (ﷻ) and His Prophet (ﷺ), her joy knew no bounds. The following Ayah was revealed,
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"Perhaps Allah (ﷻ) will made friendship between you and those whom you hold as enemies. And Allah has power (over all things), and Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful." (60:7)
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Abu Al-Qasim bin Asakar quoting Hasan says once Mu'awiyah was visiting the Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) while he was seated with Umm Habibah beside him. When he turned to leave, Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) called out to him and invited him to sit with them.
The Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) then told him that he sincerely wished that they three should sit together and have the pure drink of Paradise there.
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These words imply that they will all three, Allah (ﷻ) Willing, be in Paradise. In a similar manner the glad tidings of Paradise for Umm Habibah are implied in a very famous statement of the Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) that he has been commanded by Allah (ﷻ) to marry only ladies who were deserving of Paradise.
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So this means that in this very earthly existence all the Mothers of the Believers had been given the joyous news that they would go to Paradise in the Hereafter.
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Umm Habibah, due to her knowledge, mastery over Hadith and eloquence was ranked third among the Mothers of the Believers. The first in rank was 'A'ishah (ra) and the second was Umm Salamah (ra). There are sixty-five Hadiths narrated by her. Some of them are quoted by men like Mu'awiyah, 'Abdullah bin 'Utbah bin Abu Sufyan, 'Urwah bin Zubayr, Salem bin Shawal bin Maki, Abu Al-Jarrah Qurashi. The ladies - Zaynab bint Umm Salamah Makhzumiyyah and Safiyyah bint Shaybah 'Abdariah quoted others.
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In Sahih Al-Bukhari it is mentioned that three days after receiving news of her father's death Umm Habibah applied perfume. She then said there was no need for her to apply perfume that day, but the Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) had said,
'It is not permissible for a Muslim lady who believes in Allah and the Last day of Judgment to mourn for more than three days for a dead person, except for her husband. Then she should observe mourning for four months and ten days.'
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When someone conveyed the message that 'Uthman bin 'Affan was martyred in his house after being besieged, she was so upset that she prayed the killer's hands should be cut off and that he should be disgraced and shamed in public. And Allah (ﷻ) fulfilled her prayer. A man entered the murderer's house and attacked him with a sword; and when the murderer tried to protect himself with his right hand, it got Cut off. Then he tried to flee from him and ran into the street, holding his sheet with his teeth. But he could not manage it, the sheet fell, and he was left standing naked in front of all the people on the street.
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During her brother Mu'awiyah rule she visited Damascus, and it was during his caliphate that she passed away in Al-Madinah. Umm Habiba spent four years of her life with the Prophet and lived for another thirty three years after he had died, died at the age of seventy-two in 44 AH. Before her death Umm Habibah sent messages to 'A'ishah and Umm Salamah apologizing for any offense she might have caused them when disagreements or differences had occurred. Both 'A'ishah and Umm Salamah were very touched by this gesture.
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"O the one in (complete) rest and satisfaction! Come back to your Lord - well pleased and well pleasing. Enter you then among My (honored) servants, and enter you My Paradise." (89:27-30)