We Make Mayhem [boyxboy]

Chapter Thirty-Five

I didn't know why, but I kept putting off asking Mom and Dad about the trip. I had a dozen opportunities with Mom, but I could never make myself say the words. And Dad... I had little more than a few strained conversations with him. He had never been the authority, but now he definitely wasn't. Now he was like a ghost, haunting the edges of my life. I felt vaguely uncomfortable when he was around. My fingers always got the urge to grab my car keys and head out.

Finally, two days before fall break, I couldn't really put it off any longer. Mom came in the door from work, changed into her onesie pyjamas, and cuddled in on the couch with a glass of wine to watch Netflix. Before she could turn on the TV, I sat down on the other arm of the couch and cleared my throat.

"Ooh, are you going to watch with me?" she asked. "You're not off to see Noah? What a treat!"

I shifted uncomfortably. "Actually, we're going to a movie. He's picking me up in a few minutes."

"Never mind," Mom sighed. "What's up?"

"Um... I kept meaning to mention it to you, but Noah's family invited me to come to their private island for fall break. Would it be okay with you if I went?"

"Oh, that sounds fabulous. Where is it?"

"I don't actually know," I said. "It's secret."

She ran her fingertip around the rim of her wine glass. She smiled, her eyes very crinkled. It was her slightly-unhappy smile. More of a grimace.

"You're so different these days," she said. "Not in a bad way. Just... different."

"Oooookay," I said. "How?"

She waved her hand. "It's not a big deal."

"My mother saying I'm different these days feels like kind of a big deal."

"I shouldn't have said anything."

"Yeah, maybe not."

"Ugh. Sweetie. Sit down."

I did. Mom set down her wine, twisted to face me, and took my hands.

"He's your match, isn't he?" she asked. "That's why you've... suddenly changed?"

Just thinking about it all—Noah, the tight, bubbly feeling in my chest when I looked at him, the way I felt when I saw his name on Temptr—I had to struggle to hide a gigantic grin. I didn't have to say a thing. Mom knew.

She nodded. "Okay. I thought so."

"It's real," I blurted out. "Mom, I knew Noah was the one the minute I saw him. And believe me, I wasn't looking to fall in love with a guy. I'm not gay." I paused. "Maybe I am. Maybe I'm bi. I don't actually know. It doesn't matter. I knew Noah was my End Game the minute I saw him. Temptr only told me what I already knew."

Mom didn't really look reassured by this, and why would she? That basically meant that her husband had known, from the minute he met Chloe, that his wife wasn't the love of his life.

Except Mom didn't know it was Chloe.

"What does that feel like?" Mom asked.

"It feels like... the pieces coming together." I swallowed. "Like suddenly figuring out the answer to a riddle. And you can't ignore it. Once you know the answer, you have to solve the riddle. You have to—"

Drop everything, I was going to say. But I couldn't. That was too cruel.

"Break up with whoever you're wasting your time with," Mom finished. "I get it."

I sighed. "Mom..."

"No, it's okay. I'm over it. I'm sure Chloe's over it. I'm sure what you had with her wasn't worth hanging on to, anyway."