The cover is eye-catching, the author's note and promotional video are professional, and you don't have a ton of excess. If I was in a nitpicky mood I might say that the cover would look better with a white font without the bevel and the author name should be more prevalant. But since I am a constantly pleasant and merciful person, I won't mention it ;)
I am going to take a point off for the images in the headers because I just disapprove of those generally. Most of the time they're generic pictures off the internet and all of the time they give readers images of your characters when the readers should be allowed to imagine them for themselves.
HOOK ✿✿✿❀❀
The blurb is ultra vague. The stakes aren't clear enough and as a result we don't have enough fear for the character. I have mixed feelings about certain phrases such as "memories haunt her", "her deepest dreams", "risking it all" and "giving up the world she knows" because I feel like I've read them in a million blurbs and for me that's a turn-off. However I also understand that there is a certain format that is used by most authors in this genre and if you've chosen to go with that format it's not necessarily bad. Just not my cuppa tea.
I swear if I had a dollar for every time a historical fiction blurb described a character as "seductive" I'd be rich enough to pay someone to pay someone to pay someone to burn my kruge...
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#if you get it you get it
But I digress. The blurb is professional enough, you just need to add more specifics in there so readers have a clearer idea of the conflict. Your prologue helps slightly to make up for the fogginess of the blurb because it builds suspense pretty effectively. I like the opening sentence and you manage to set the atmosphere and give us a solid idea of where we are without taking time to go into length backstory that some people feel is needed to set a scene. The only thing I don't like is the random snippets of a flashback. This works better in movies. In the book, it's a little awkward because you start off with fragments and random things like the water dripping and the muffled cries, but then get into a full-on scene which isn't all fragmented and vague. I would either do the actual scene or stick to the short, striking phrases. For example, do the dialogue without any tags so it'll be vague to match the other style. If I have to say vague one more time I'll be very cross because I can't think of a synonym for it and I'm too lazy to look one up.
GRAMMAR ✿✿✿✿✿
Your grammar is impeccable and I would expect nothing less. Rest assured, if there had been anything to peck, I would have pecked.
PLOT ✿✿✿❀❀
I don't feel like we needed a prologue that long to introduce Lucius' origin. It made me invested in Justus when I get the feeling he's going to be dead for the rest of the book and therefore I've wasted my time and effort in caring about him. I'm not saying cut the whole prologue, it's good to know how Lucius came to be who he is, but you could pare it down a lot and have everything you need for the intro. Also, if I hadn't watched your promotional video (which at least some readers probably won't), I'd have no idea who Lucius is due to the aforementioned blurry blurb, so this would be less of a hook and I'd probably be more annoyed later when I figure out Justus isn't part of the story.
Also, the beginning kind of drags, since the majority of the story takes place with Enid in Rome. If you open up with her being kidnapped, it'll be much more exciting and readers will engage more quickly. I know I only read the first three parts but I did go a little farther to see how long it takes for her to get kidnapped and her backstory with her family seems to go on a while. Is all that stuff about her being betrothed necessary to the plot? I got the impression it wasn't. I get that you're probably trying to establish who she is and what her life is like but we want to get to the conflict. You're in danger of losing readers if you don't get to the good stuff fast enough.
And finally I can't believe you used the "it was a day like any other" line for your first chapter. You're better than this.
CHARACTERS ✿✿✿✿❀
I like Justus because he's brave enough to go against his commanders for a woman he doesn't really know, and then risk everything for his wife and secret child. However, as I mentioned before, I'm peeved that you spent so much time making me form an attachment to a character who isn't really a part of the story.
When Enid was talking about how, if she'd known she was going to be taken away, she would have enjoyed her last days in her home more fully, I felt like that really established her character for me. I found her to be sweet and had an almost optimistic tone, choosing to focus on the good things about her home rather than her hatred of the people who took her away. Since the blurb gave me the impression she was pretty bitter about the whole enslavement thing (as one would be), I'm guessing Enid is going to go through a rough patch after she gets taken away but eventually is able to find peace about the whole thing, hence the way she talks about it in the beginning.
I'm not really passionate about either of the characters though? I guess they're just a little dry to me. I debated taking a point off because it's not bad writing but at the end of the day you asked for my opinion and this is it. This isn't the type of character I like to root for, but I like her well enough. Too bad she's going to get kidnapped in about 18 chapters.
Kidding, kidding. Hopefully.
ENJOYMENT ✿✿❀❀❀
This is entirely personal bias and I'm sorry to give this rating. I think this book is very well-written and the author is incredibly true to the genre. I wouldn't be able to pick it out of a line of bestsellers at a bookstore. However, the elements that make it true to the genre are things like melodrama and sincere, honorable characters, and those just don't engage me. I like my drama plainly stated and my characters with questionable morals.
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Like I said if you get it you get it.
CONCLUSION:
This author applied for a review for her professional and well-written book and instead got a Six of Crows appreciation post. Sorry.
