I Dont Believe In Fairytales (intro)

I flop on my bed in relief.

I made it through another day long day at university, finally.

My head starts to go numb with the sound of my phone.

Buzz. Buzz. Buzz. Buzz.

Not right now.

The caller I.D makes me even more convice not pick it up.

Buzz. Buzz. Buzz. Buzz.

The sound of the other end comforts me but makes me angry, "Hey"

"Oh, you finally decide to call me." I quickly snap.

"I would have calle-"

"But you were proably busy right?" I cut him off. Not giving him a chance to answer.

I told him I was about to take a nap and wasnt in the mood to really talk right now.

"Im s-sorry, I just wanted to let you know Im sorry about Friday. I was hoping I could make it up...tonight."

By "Im sorry about friday" he means talking on his phone throughout the 45 mintue time we had to ourselves for the first time in two months, on our 'dinner date'.

I would never talk to him like I am right now, because in many ways its not his fault.

I just really want to be with him more.

"Im sorry Harry its just that-"

"I know, I miss you too, Ill be uh there to pick you up around um 7?" Then he hungs up. No, bye...no take care, nothing.

Even though i know his sick, the voice that came through because of his cold sounded like a cry.

I have only seen Harry cry once and thats when I was video chatting him, while I was crying because of threats and disgusting tweets on twitter.

It wasn't really a cry, I just saw him pull tears away from the conner of his eyes, while I was.

That horrible memory comes back to my head.

He was hopeless, he was great though at trying to help me calm down. We just ended up laughing really bad at a stupid video on YouTube.

I remember the tweet though.

and I probably wont ever forget it.

This one didn't have swear words in it, like the usual "Get away from my boyfriend, slut" kind of tweet.

This screamed a horrible thought id dug deep deep deep into my head because I have asked myself the same question but in different wording and absolutely with a different view and a bit of a heart.

She doesnt even know me, she just loves the boys.

But how did she find such words to send?

I remember the tweet flashing over and over again in my head.

"Why didn't ur parents abort you while they still could get away with murder, i would."

Little did she know my parents did leave me.

While growing up I wish I was aborted.

I had no actual parents, I realized this when I was 13 and my "adpotive parents" Maire & Daniel gave me the news.

I didn't come out of my bed room for two weeks. Maire would stand by my door and say things like"Your mom just couldnt handle you, she was so young, but baby, she always wanted to keep you but she just couldnt."

As I got older, stories and hints about my mother and father came and went.

I found out my mother was only 15 and my father was only 17.