Life goes on

Maybes

I thought you were my one and only
I did things with you that I would never do with anyone else
I opened up in ways I never thought I would open up
I shared things that I promised myself I wouldn't share

I miss your carefree smile 
I miss the way you could make me happy
I miss those piercing blue eyes of yours

I thought I would never love again until I met you
The way I could talk about anything
The way we laughed about the weirdest things

Then something happened and you wouldn't leave me an explanation
You wouldn't talk about it with me. 
You just said, "I don't think this is gonna work out."
No reasons and no explanation.
You just left 

Tears steadily went down my face whenever the 70s show came on
The way you called me your girl when I told you my favorite show
We talked about Nascar and I texted my friends what happened
So I could keep a conversation with you going
I wouldn't have tried so hard if I knew what the outcome was

Not a week later, you texted me an apology 
How you really wanted to work this out, but when you woke up
You didn't want us anymore, so I agreed to just be friends
We started talking again and made plans
But of course, you broke things off again two days before the date

I thought we had something special
Maybe it was just one-sided, maybe not
I would have given you the world if you had let me

We started talking again a week later
I thought this time it would be different
But I was dumb and my friends all asked why I would put myself through that again
This time you didn't even give me an apology.
Just ghosted me and when we made eye contact it was awkward

I wish you would have consulted me before just leaving
Maybe men were always made for leaving 
I wish things would have ended up differently
But until things get better, I'll just be crying on the bathroom floor

I know this sounds bad, but I would do anything for him
I would go through this all again as long as it was him
I'm scared to open up to anyone again 

My best friend says I need to start talking to other people 
To get over him, but it ain't that easy
All I see when I close my eyes is his smile
He's in my dreams helping me get away from the bad guys
I see him at church and his name often comes up on social media
I see him and his family at the Ice Cream place

Maybe one day, this will be in the past
Maybe, I'll still be wanting to get with him
Maybe, he'll realize that he made a mistake
Maybe, one day we will be together 
Maybe, I'm just getting my hopes up