Awkward

Thinking of you...

I think in some parts in life, everything comes crushing down. When I opened my eyes I didn't see Charlie all I saw was the doctor and my family plus Dylan and....no Zeke. I smiled and told everyone I was alright, Dylan came and hugged me gently while leaving a kiss on my forehead. Gosh Dylan, you don't deserve me. I mean look at us right now any girl would have had her heart fluttered by having her boyfriend by her side after she woke up from a panic attack, but nooo I have stupid Zeke in my head. I don't think I can lie to myself and Dylan anymore even though Zeke made it very clear to me that he doesn't like me that way. A girls life is to complicated.

"Penny for your thoughts?" I snapped out of my trance as Dylan looks down at me worriedly.

"Nothing I guess I just spaced out for a minute there," lie. Everything in my life has been a huge lie since I've met Zeke and nothing can change that, but  it's different with Dylan because he actually makes me feel special and it makes me doubt my feelings for Zeke.

"Let's just get out of here I hate the hospital," I said getting up but then sitting back down as the room got dizzier.

"I'll just get you a wheel chair and tell your aunt that you want to leave,ok?" I nodded. I decided to get changed as I walked out of the bathroom and sat in my bed I heard the door open.

"Dylan, I need help zipping my dress," It was a lovely yellow dress with pink flowers on it (I know, not my style but grandma gave it to me and It wouldn't be nice if I didn't wear it. As he entered the room I turned around shocked. It was Zeke, gosh this is so stereotypic right? 

"Zeke what," I cleared my throat because my voice came out shaky," what are you doing here?" I asked.

"I heard that you got another panic attack and that this one was a little bit worse," he said clearing his throat as he zipped up my dress. My heart is pounding so fast.

"Um thank you I have to go n- OUCH WHAT THE FUCK THAT HURT!" I screamed as I hit my hip on the counter, "Stupid effing counter nobody likes you, why don't you just go and fuck yourself!" I said rubbing my hip. Zeke started laughing at me and I gave him a death glare.

"It's not funny that's going to leave a huge bruise," I pouted and his face turned serious.

"Please don't do that because I'll have to kiss you," I stopped and unconsciously bit my lip, "That's it." He pinned me against the wall and started kissing me.

"Amy!" not right now.

"Amy wake up!" my eyes flew open and I looked around the room.

It was a dream.

Awww fuck it.

I got up and Dylan helped me sit down on the bed and he started crying.

"Hey what's wrong?" I asked, cupping his face with my hands.

"My sister's in the hospital," He said, "she got into a car crash," I didn't even know he had a sister. I grabbed his face and brought it closer to me.

"Look at me Dylan, she will be fine and you and I will go together as soon as they let us see her  ok?" He nodded and I kissed his lips, everything was going fine until his I started to feel Zeke's hand around my waist and his lips on mine. I broke it off and smiled. I softly stroked his face.

"Gosh I don't deserve you Amber," he said and I shooked my heas. No Dylan it's me who doesn't deserve you. I kissed the top of his forehead and hugged him hard. This hurts a lot because I don't want to hurt you and what makes me feel like a bigger bitch is that I still wish it was Zeke in my arms and not you.

"Amber?" I turned around and saw no one other than Zeke. Oh sweet baby Jesus tell me I'm dreaming.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Dylan said getting up a little bit annoyed.

"I came to tell your girlfriend how much I love her." He said starring at me and giving me a sly smile.

Wait what?