Cam Baby

Chapter 3

Jackson loved South Korea, though it had its shit to fix, and it was kind of an ass, the country was like a second home to him. It didn’t keep him from missing his first and only home, though; sometimes, it was a little eerie just how alike the two countries are but there were things that China had that made it better than South Korea, according to him. 

Sometimes when he’s on the phone with his mother, he can’t help but want to cry as she talks about how things are back at home. 

“We’re all doing fine, Ka-Yee,” she says, fondly calling him by his Chinese name, “don’t worry about us so much, boabei.” 

Jackson sniffs, rubbing his eyes, “I should say that to you, Māmā. Don’t worry so much about me.” His mother coos on the other line and he can hear the sizzling of pork on the stove and he remembers how hungry he is- how he’s always hungry.

“That’s my job as your Māmā, Ka-Yee. So, stay safe for me and say hello to Jinyoungie for me, okay?” Jackson mumbles out an answer before the line cuts off; seconds later, he’s crouched into himself, trying not to cry. 

It hurt being so fucking poor that he wasn’t sure when his next meal was but these were things he had to sacrifice to make it through college and he had to make it through college. 

For his mom and his dad and all his cousins, who looked up to their “cousin who went to America and then moved to South Korea.” It doesn’t take long until his sobbing on the floor, whimpering; it made him feel pathetic just how out of bounds he felt with his friends. 

His phone’s buzzing but he doesn’t feel like answering it- he’s just not into it. The phone immediately goes into voice message and he can hear Jinyoung’s panicked voice on the other line. 

(There’s a part of him that wished it was Mark but he realizes that the elder may be too busy to talk with him.)

“Jackson, where the fuck are you?” Jinyoung asks, his voice a little worried, “your mom called me and told me to check up on you. Jacks, please call me if you’re not okay.” 

And he’s not okay- he knows he’s not- but he doesn’t want to bother the younger who had better things to do than worry over the pathetic Chinese foreigner who couldn’t get his shit together. 

His phone dings again and he picks it up, seeing a text notification; it’s from Mark.

Mark Tuan
Missing u, baby. Are u ok? 

Jackson smiles at the text, wiping the tears from his eyes (he was wrong; Mark did care), trying to think up something to say. 

Wang.puppy
Missing u too, Daddy 

Mark Tuan
…
U make me want to do bad things to you. 

Wang.puppy
.////.

It really doesn’t take much for him to start blushing at Mark’s antics; it's sort of pathetic on how easily he’s attached but he can’t help it. He’s so busy smiling at his phone he doesn’t hear when his hare-brained friends break through his door.

“Jackson!” Bambam screams from the top of his lungs (Jackson winces as his landlord beats on his wall in answer) “We’re here to save your miserable pathetic college self!”  

Jinyoung’s the one to find him, still hunched over near his bed and to take pity on him. 

He feels the urge to cry once more when Jinyoung lifts his chin with his finger, staring worriedly into his face.