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the silence that permeated the space between dex & fitz the next week was more than just the absence of sound. it was painfully physical: thick & soupy & slow. it made dex want to choke up words, something to quell the excruciating, excessive stillness.

so it was he who spoke first, breaking the spell. uh. hi. his voice was scratchy & dull, a feeble protective layer from fitz's scathing words, from his own horrible mortification.

hey, fitz said. his voice was gravelly, & a little bit raspy. dex. i, um...

here's the ring, dex said softly, holding it out. tinker had left earlier, today, just a dash of hello & a splash of instruction before she was gone, before she was gone to wherever she always went. before dex & fitz were left alone in the room with the ticking clock & all of the gears. before they were left to the shame & the numbing noiselessness.

i'm sorry, fitz said, leaving dex's hand hanging.

what? dex didn't know what he had expected. maybe anger, maybe threats, maybe disgust. not an apology.

i was an absolute asshole, fitz continued, & there was something bitter in his voice. i was horrible. & nothing excuses that. he took a deep, shaky breath in.

& then he grabbed the ring & shoved it onto his thumb. & he talked, words spilling out of his mouth so fast he could hardly breathe. i lashed out at you because everything you were saying is what i've thought before. i'm a complete coward, & to have someone else know that too is horrible, dex. what about biana? she was raised in the same family. she's my sister! everyone stares at her all the time, & she didn't hide. she fucking leaped into the spotlight. she grabbed linh's hand & everyone's attention & she took a chance & she changed everything. & i'm still here, with all this denial bullshit, & i have a crush on you too, dex, but i just run away, & i fuck everything up, & everyone hates me now & i deserve it. but i was thinking about it, all week long, & i can't do this anymore. i can't keep pretending i'm someone i'm not.

dex stared at fitz, & his heart was galloping in his chest. wait. you... like me?

yeah, fitz said, & he looked at the ring on his hand, & he smiled. yeah, i do.

& then they were kissing, before dex had time to think about it, before he had time to realize that this was sophie's boyfriend & everyone hated fitz now & none of it mattered anyway & fitz's lips were chapped & scratchy & they tasted like tangerines but dex didn't care, & the huge, scary world shrank away so that all that was left was the huge cavernous room in widgetmoor & he thought that maybe this was all he needed.

& then fitz broke away, & dex's voice was hoarse & quiet when he said, break up with sophie.

i'll leap to havenfield tomorrow, fitz promised. he smiled, & grabbed dex's hand. the truth ring on his finger was cold against the technopath's skin, & he had dirt under his nails, but nothing mattered. this is good, dex. you're cute. & you're nice. & you're beautiful. & i think i'm happy.

for an exchange that had started with a frosty awkwardness, dex realized, this was maybe the best way for it to have gone. me too, he said, & everything else was forgotten, & it was only them there.

& then he smiled so big that fitz was probably blinded by his dimples.


a/n: okay lmao idk what this is anymore. the story is progressing in like little bursts. two chapters ago fitz was dating sophie & stuff, & now they're kissing & he's promising to break up with her? idk. kinda weird-- but i really like the way i write these stories. like description-wise. :)

please vote & comment, & if you tag a friend or two, it would make my day. have a great day xx

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