TMA Crack One-Shots

Sup Fuckers

             Jonathan Sims didn't enjoy meetings. Just sitting there while listening to Elias go on and on about things that really held no meaning to Jon. He especially hated when his assistants were late. And guess who was late? Tim.
             Jon sat there, arms crossed, leaned back in his seat while listening to Elias drone on. Besides him sat an equally bored but somehow attentive Martin, and across from him was Sasha, who was listening to Elias but Jon knew she also didn't really care about the subject. Next to her was an empty seat, which should have been filled twenty minutes ago. What a great example Tim was setting.
             Everyone's attention was caught when the door opened, and lo and behold, there stood Tim. "Sup fuckers." Tim announced his presence, sitting down next to Sasha, who had covered her mouth as though to keep from laughing.
             Silence fell across the room as Elias stopped talking to take in what had happened. When Jon turned his gaze to Elias, he could see just how disappointed he was. Jon sighed, moving his glare onto an obviously pleased Tim.
             "Moving on..." Elias said, continuing what he was previously talking about before the disruption. Jon propped his elbows up on the table, putting his head in his hands. Martin nudged him with his elbow as though asking if Jon was alright. Jon simply gazed at Martin, and judging by Martin giving a silent nod and looking away, he assumed that Martin took that as a no.

             After the meeting Jon was, of course, mad. He always made it clear that they had to arrive on time to every meeting and every day to work, but somehow, in some way, Tim manages to be late some days, with no explanation. Jon headed to Tim's office, and opened the door "Timothy Stoker." He addressed, glaring at Tim who was just sitting at his desk, reading over some papers.
             Tim gazed up from the papers, looking at Jon. "Hey boss. Anything I can do for you?" He asked, setting his papers down and crossing his arms.
             "What was that? Why were you late?" Jon asked, still glaring at Tim all the while.
             Tim obviously wasn't bothered by the glare. "Well, I woke up late so I had to go through all the morning public transportation when I was already running late, which made me even more late. As for the 'sup fuckers', this place just needs some light, wouldn't you agree?" He asked.
             "The lights here are fine, Tim." Jon commented.
             Tim stared at Jon "That's not how I meant that, but alright. Are you just going to stay mad at me, or are you going to give me some work to do? I'd rather not have my time wasted." He said, leaning back in his chair.
             "What I need you to do is to quit arriving late. I better see you tomorrow bright and early in the archives. Got it?" Jon asked, lowering his eyebrows.
             A slight, malicious grin appeared across Tim's lips "Got it, boss." Tim confirmed, nodding his head.
             "Good." Jon said, turning and leaving the office. He knew Tim wouldn't jeopardize his job in such a ridiculous way... Or would he? Jon wasn't actually sure. He hoped that Tim wouldn't

... Tim did. By the next morning, Jon was pacing about near the door to the archives, waiting for Tim to arrive. He continued to pace back and forth, left with his own thoughts until the door to the archives was slammed open. Of course, Tim was there. "WHAT'S UP, BITCHES." Tim shouted, loud enough that Jon was sure that Martin and Sasha would hear him as though he was talking at a normal volume in their office, but it was incredibly loud for Jon.
             "Tim!" Jon yelled, turning to face Tim. "What did I tell you?!"
             "Oh come on, lighten up, boss." Tim said, rolling his eyes. "Do you think getting mad at us over ridiculous things is going to make us more willing to work?" He asked.
             "I-." Jon paused, "That's besides the point." He eventually huffed. "Arriving late is unacceptable." He commented, stepping closer to Tim, but noticing that it obviously wasn't intimidating Tim.
             "And yelling at your assistants is fine?" Tim asked, speaking very snarkily now.
             "Alright, break it up." Sasha said, getting between the two and placing her hand on their chests, pushing them away from each other. "Let's not fight in the archives. Let's not fight at all." She crossed her arms, looking between them.
             "We wouldn't be having this issue if Tim would just listen to me." Jon grumbled, still staring at Tim.
             "If you could just laugh a little, maybe things would be better." Tim responded.
             "Guys, for God sake, just get to work. I shouldn't have to boss the two of you about. Especially not you, Jon." Sasha said, gazing at Jon.
             "Fine. You're right. Get to work, Tim." Jon huffed, turning and walking to his own office.
             "Of course, boss..." Tim sarcastically grumbled, heading the other way, going to his own office.
             Sasha sighed "What am I going to do with them?" She asked no one in particular, shaking her head.