Chapter 1 - Things to Note

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I wonder why we were ever friends.

Sincerely,

Adeline Stargate

I set my pen down with a sigh and rest my hands on top of my head as I lean back against my desk chair. The afternoon light pours through my window, spilling over the letter. I scan the page, taking in the heavy underlines and teardrops.

This has to be the last letter I write. Ever. If I write three more next year, I'm going to go insane. I can already feel it.

"Adeline!" Mom calls. "The Inkroses are here!"

"Coming," I call back.

I fold Faye's letter and put it in an envelope. I don't bother sealing it, but I can't help but write "Faye Lockyear, Junior Year" on the front of the envelope. Just some weird tradition I have, I guess. I stack Faye's letter with the rest and count them. Three for Dean... Three for Cyril... And three for Faye.

"Adeline!" Dad shouts this time.

"One second!" I promise.

I carefully place the letters in my bag, counting them one last time. When I'm sure all nine are there, I zip it shut. I pull on a hoodie and shorts over my swimsuit and slip on a pair of sandals. I glance at myself in the mirror on the way out, and I have to pause at how red my eyes are. Maybe I can just chalk it up to allergies if anyone asks and leave it at that.

I glance towards my open bedroom door and take a deep breath. Everything will be fine. It has to be fine. I just need to get through the rest of the day. Right... Rest of the day. I exhale, looking back at my reflection. I nod to myself and head downstairs, gripping the strap of my bag. The second I reach the bottom, Anders sweeps me off my feet into a hug.

"Adeline!" he bellows. "It's so great to see you!"

"You saw her last week, Dad," Jax points out.

He mouths an apology to me. I wave him off. We should both be used to this by now. Our parents are best friends, so Jax and I practically grew up together. But once we hit high school, we just kind of drifted apart, and our parents have been especially affectionate to the others' kid ever since.

"That doesn't mean I don't miss her," Anders counters. "You should really visit more often, Adeline. You used to visit us all the time."

"I've been..." Losing my mind. Trying not to cry too much. Sorting out my issues. Getting my life together. "...busy. I'll try to visit more often this summer."

"Please do," Lillian adds, standing by her husband. "We'd love to have you around."

"Same goes for you, Jax," Dad says, holding his hand out.

Jax clasps it, flashing a smile. "Of course, Barett. I'll try my best."

Dad returns his smile, clapping Jax on the shoulder. "You better."

"We'll worry about that later," Mom says. "Maybe we should head out to lunch so the kids can go to the bonfire as soon as possible."

There's always a bonfire at the end of the school year, but it's also Friday which means my family has to go out to eat with the Inkroses. No exceptions. At all... So instead of dinner, it's lunch this week. The parents head to the cars first, leaving me to close and lock the door. Jax stays back with me.

Jax leans against the door jamb, his hands in his pockets. I feel his syrup brown eyes on me, and I don't have to look to know he has that easy smile on his face. The one that's always been a part of him since we were kids.

"Ready for another weekly family meal?" he asks.

"I guess," I laugh, shoving the key into the lock. "At this point, it's just kind of routine."

"Let me guess: you'd rather be at the bonfire?"

I drop my keys into my bag, quickly zipping it shut before Jax can catch sight of the letters. The letters I plan to read and then burn tonight at the bonfire. "You have no idea."

When I turn to face Jax, he narrows his eyes. "You okay?"

I nod. "Why do you ask?"

"Your eyes are a little red."

Damn it. I wave him off as casually as I can. "Allergies."

Jax nods, but his eyes still flicker across my face. "Right..."

I turn away before he can read too much into how I look: a mess. Not that Jax would ever tell me that. Not even with my amber bird's nest of hair from all the times I ran my hands through it while writing. Then there are my eyes: a gray storm cloud in the middle of a reddening sky.

"Anyway," I say a little too loudly, "wouldn't you rather be at the bonfire than have lunch with our parents? Or literally do anything else?"

Jax shrugs, keeping pace with me as we head down the walkway. "Not really. I feel like the bonfire is just me watching my friends get drunk and trying to get them home in one piece."

I glance at him. "Don't you drink with them?"

He nudges me, glancing at his parents' car. "Shh. Besides, I don't drink enough to get drunk. Just like one bottle."

I laugh, and Jax's expression softens as he looks at me. I inhale and glance away, adjusting my bag. "Yeah. Fair. But that sounds about right. Getting everyone home in one piece..." Me included.

"Really? That sounds like something Dean and Faye would need, but not Cyril. He can help you get them home, can't he?"

"Usually." But this year, I'm praying all my friends are drunk or distracted enough to let me do what I plan to do. I put my hand on the door handle of my parents' car and look back at Jax. "We'll just have to see what happens this year."

He opens the back door to his parents' car and puts one foot in. "Guess we will. See you at the diner."

Jax slips inside, shutting the door behind him. I take a deep breath before getting into my parents' car. Let's get this over with.

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