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"So, when you gonna let Tae put a baby in you?", I joke with Chastity and she almost hit me with the spatula.
"Bitch, I'll be gay before then. Nah, on some real shit, I might let him if we get married. Cause unlike yo' early ass, I wanna get married first", she points at me, and I roll my eyes.
"I ain't mean to get pregnant. But Tremaine ass ain't goin' no where no time soon", I say, and she sucks her teeth.
"Y'all better not have y'all kids comin' out lookin' like the nigga from the Berger and Greene commercial. 800-588-2300 Empire Today headass", she said, and I laugh.
"Chastity, I know you ain't talkin', you built like the bird off the Coco puffs commercial. Don't ever in life try to come for my niece", my Aunty chimed in, coming in with bags from Walmart and dressed in all black.
"Aha!", I laugh, sticking my tongue out.
"Camille, I'm on your big head ass. Ol' box fan built ass. Ol' hood stove face ass. 1980 box TV headass", Dre popped in, and I clap my hands.
"I know yo' Debo from Friday lookin' ass ain't talkin'. Ol' boom box built hoe, I'm on you! Naked mole rat face ass hoe. Ol' Spongebob cousin Stanley built hoe", I say quickly so he doesn't have time to slip a joke in.
I heard Tremaine laughing at Dre turned to him, knowing I can keep going for days.
"Tremaine, I know you don't think shit sweet, nigga. Ol' Get the power with Oxyclean face ass", Dre said in a strong ass, fake ass Australian accent.
"Okay, first of all, you can't be talkin' to me when you look like fuckin' Mike Tyson built ass. Floyd Mayweather, can't read havin' ass. Yeah, nigga, don't forget you the one who told me you ain't learn how to tie yo' shoes till you was ten nigga, fuck wrong", Tremaine went off while laughing.
"Hol' up! Y'all ain't finna be gettin' on my husband. Camille, I know yo' camel back built ass ain't talkin', arthritis havin' ass. Two, Tremaine, I know you can't be talkin', according to my cacalathunth, face ass", Nia popped off, putting on a strong ass fake lisp.
We all went quiet and she bowed before taking her bags to the living room.
"Well damn, Nia. Ain't have to do me like that", Tremaine mumbled, and we all laughed.
We were putting the finishing touches on everything, but Chastity was the only one who knew what the outcome was going to be. Personally, I want a boy and a girl, but I have a feeling it's going to be two girls.
