24. Past

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Jo shifted the car into park and killed the engine, but didn't make an immediate move to exit

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Jo shifted the car into park and killed the engine, but didn't make an immediate move to exit. She lingered in the front seat as her conviction wavered. The evening sun was gradually setting, bathing the dilapidated building ahead of them in an amber glow. She swore to herself she'd never come back here, but many self-made promises were broken by this point. What difference would a few more make?

Tim sat patiently in the passenger's seat, appraising her hesitantly. Whatever it was she had decided to reveal to him, he'd at least extend the common courtesy of allowing her to do it in her own time, on her own terms.

Her breathing was measured as her mind traveled back to remembrances she'd rather leave untrodden, but that wasn't the purpose of this particular exercise. She had brought them here to take a tour through her past. Inspecting each of the broken pieces like they were on display in a museum dedicated to her nightmares.

"What is this place?" Tim finally asked, his careful words shaking Jo from her reverie. She blinked several times, returning her mind to the present. Her sweaty palms gripped the steering wheel, trying to clasp to some semblance of reality. She entertained the impulse to back out. Contemplated announcing that she'd changed her mind, and committing to the lie that there was nothing to see here. They'd come too far, though. Had waved goodbye to the possibility of retreat as they'd driven right on past its turn-off point.

Jo had willingly swum into open waters, and there was no life raft available to save her from the tide threatening to pull her under. "This is where I grew up," she admitted grimly, then swung the car door open, stepping out onto the overgrown grass.

Her former home would be considered ramshackle at best by any casual observer. The majority of its exterior paint had been chipped away by the elements. Windows were shattered, and shutters hung loosely from its frame. She couldn't say it looked much more inhabitable when she'd lived there, but time had whittled away at the structure in its years spent neglected.

Jo's feet dragged her towards the entrance, though her mind screamed at them to halt in their traitorous motions. When they stalled on the threshold, her hand extended towards the doorknob. Fingers barely brushing the handle, before she retracted the extremity quickly, as if burned by the metal.

"Once you know something, you can't unknow it. You sure you're willing to live with that?" She questioned Tim, though her eyes never strayed from the offending barrier before her. Truth lay on the other side, certainly, but it wasn't a good truth. More a burden of knowledge, really.

"I think I can handle it," he promised. His certitude wasn't earned, however. Tim had no concept of what he was voluntarily walking into, nor the far-reaching repercussions of such comprehension. It required a great leap of faith on both their parts. Jo, in trusting that he could handle the revelations she was finally willing to dole out. Tim, in believing that she would once and for all allow him a glimpse into her elusive mind.

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