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"You are smiling"

I open my eyes to see my man's face brightly smiling to me. I wish this is all a dream. But it's all happening in real times. Whenever I looked at his eyes, I fell in love with him even more. Why it is not a dream?

"Are you okay?"

Am I okay?I don't know. I don't want to get up. I want to sleep for a long time. I want to dream all the time.

He held my hands. Whenever he hold my hands, I feel  protective. I feel like a special person.

I nodded.

"I got scared"

I don't know what to do now. I want to go out of his life but he hold me strongly. Should I smile or not? May be I was wrong. How can I leave without him? He is my everything though.

I smiled having thousands of thoughts in my mind.

"I want to go out" I asked him. I have been on this bed for already an hour. I need a fresh air.

He took me to the wheel chair and moved me to the backyard.

It feels so great to get a fresh air. Its suffocating in the hospital. He slowly walked me to the bench in the garden. He took out his phone and his headphones.

"Listen to this songs. I want you to listen every song before the release so I put it on when you are not conscious. You can hear that now and tell me how is it"

I looked at him.

"I will go. You can listen to it."

He gets up from the bench but I held his hands. He sits back.

We shared his headphones. I don't know what I am thinking but this is what he wants.

"Why didn't you go to work today?"

"I have nothing to do today "

I nodded.

"Why are you not coming home?"

Should I tell the truth?

'I can't do anything. I will be only a burden to everyone. I need to fix my mind.'

I said my answer to myself. I will never tell this. This is not his fault. This is me who is mentally not okay but wishes the best for her husband.

"I need some time"

"For what?" He looks at me. I turned my head away from him.

"For everything " I said almost like a whisper.

I can live with those sweet memories that I had with him. That's enough for me.

"So where are we staying today?"

"We"

"Yeah. We"  what can I do to make him leave this place.

"Don't you understand what I was saying all this time? I need time time..why are you always stick with me. I hate it." I said out with so much anger inside me.

"Don't you understand what I was saying? Why are you not coming? Do I look like a monster to you? What's with you? Do you think that I can ask you all day to come home. I can take you home right now but I respect you. If this is what you really want then I am okay with it. Go...go...just go where you want." He argued back.

"Call my sister. You don't have to help me." I said more in a annoyed tone.

He took his mobile and went away from me to talk to her. Damn why it is painful? Why I didn't die on that day?why do I even come back like this to hurt him?

"She will be here" he said and take the bench next to mine. He doesn't even look at me. I want him to go away but when he do that, I can't take this. It's hard. We sit in silence. He don't want to try to talk to me. I cried in silence.

He stood up and walk towards me looking straight that's where my sister coming to me. I nodded at her.

"Take her with you. She doesn't need me here." He walks away without even look at me.

"Don't cry sis" she patted my back. I braved myself to let go of him.

"Sis you are doing wrong. You don't know what uncle went through these years. If anyone in his position, they probably get married again and start to live another life but he only wait for you."

"I know all these things. You don't have to tell me."  I wish he is one of that anyone.

"If you know you don't be like this right now"

"So what?you are not going to take care of me." I hate myself. I can't live my life on my own.

"You are wrong again. Read this message" she passed her phone.

"Take care of her well. She doesn't think right now. Tell me if you need my help. I want to give her what she want. Don't get angry on her. Call me once you reach the house." 

"I hope you know how he care for you."

I know I am going to get all the hates for my behaviour. But it's for the best. I didn't reply anything. I want to see my children atleast. We reached her home. It's a small one.

A car already parked in front of her home.

"Sis... you sit here. Give me a second." It seemed suspicious.

I think she is ignoring him but he is not. She maintained a careful distance from him. I hope it's not because of me. He left looking at me. He reminds so much of minho. Those caps and those masks, why he tried to hide him? I hope he is not an idol.

Then she came and help me with wheel chair. Should I ask her? Maybe I should wait some time for her to open up.

"Sis...I placed the night dress in the bathroom. You can wash up first."

I nodded. She took me to the bathroom and helped me to get into the tub.

She prepared a dinner for us.

"Sis...mom may be come here tomorrow. They called me to ask about you. They waited for you."

Minho. Now my parents. Minho is easy than my parents.

" yeah...okay. I know "

"Sis" she anxiously called me.

"Yeah" she improved a lot. Her cooking is not bad.

"You know...the person ...before we came here" I nodded. Why is she struggling?

"He is someone I got to know from my work. You know I am a photographer. I really don't tell anyone till now. I.. I like..him."

I chocked on my food.

"What? Why?"

"I don't know sis..he seemed different. I don't know what I am doing. Uncle know him. He knows about us well."

"Is he a singer? Did you tell him already?"

"Yeah. He is a great singer. We are dating for two years now. He rarely comes here. We fought about something a week ago. Then I went abroad, I didn't see him for a week. That's why he is here."

Two years? Why did this keep happening to our family? Is dad okay with it? They are hurting already because of me.

"How can you talk about this to dad?"

"I don't know sis. He is only a year older than me. He is not okay with getting married earlier. I can understand him. But you know the pressure from our family . That's why we fought. "

As expected. She is going to be hurt a lot. I can't say any words here. I hope she should not get hurt.

"He asks about you. But I did send him off. He is a good person sis. He loves me a lot."

Aww..look at her smile. What can I tell her?

"I don't know Dia. It's hard for me too. I don't know how can I help you. But I really hope you should not get hurt."

"I hope that too"

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