Ch. 1||~ Goodbye~

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Here I am sitting in my bed,questioning my existence as always.My sister,Seyeon was just continuously knocking on my door apologising to me about the fight earlier.

~2 hours earlier(At dinner time)~

Seyeon : Hey moom!!Whats for dinner today?? She
      asked her mom while clinging onto her.

Mom : Your favourite,Kimchi.She said as she looked
    at her daughter while smiling brightly.

Seyeon : Wow!Really??She said excitedly.

Mom : Yes!!Btw,where's your sister??

Seyeon : Where do you think she will be??She is
               probably at her room sitting and doing nothing.

Dad : I will go call her!! He said while closing his
          room's door.

Seyeon : Dad!!You know she doesn't like anyone
               entering her room.She doesn't even let ME in.

    Her dad just sighed.It was silence in the room until
    her dad broke it.

Dad : SHES ALWAYS IN HER ROOM AND NEVER
          TALKS TO US!!SHE WAS NOT LIKE 
          HOW SHE IS RIGHT NOW WHEN SHE WAS IN
          SCHOOL!!SHE WAS SO SMART AND SHE USED
          TO TALK WITH EVERYONE AND SHE WAS SUCH
          A LOVELY PERSON.ALL THE TEACHERS
          LOVED AND ADORED HER SO MUCH.BUT NOW,
          SHE DOESN'T EVEN TALK WITH HER OWN
          PARENTS AND SISTER!SHE HAS CHANGED!!
     He said with anger in his eyes.

Seyeon : Its because all her friends betrayed her and her boyfriend who she loved with all her heart and thought she will
end up with also cheated on her.

  Dad : I GUESS THEY BETRAYED HER BECAUSE SHE
            WAS A BURDEN TO THEM,WELL SHES A
            TO ME AS WELL.SHES A BURDEN TO THE
            WORLD.

   Right after he said that,they heard sobbing.
   Little did they know,the person they were talking
  about was right there listening to their conversation the whole time by standing on stairs.

    Wooyeon : So,I'm-I'm a b-burden to y-you??She said while
             she was still crying.

   Dad : Its not like what you think,dear??He said with
     hesitation.

  Wooyeon : IT IS WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE!!

     It was the first time she ever shouted on her dad.She
     just ran away to her room while still sobbing.
     Seyeon followed her but she was too late to catch
     her cuz she had already locked herself  in her room.

Mom : YAH!!HOW COULD YOU SAY THAT TO YOUR
            OWN DAUGHTER!??

   Her mom also went up to her room and her dad
   followed her upstairs.

~Back to present time(Y/N's POV)~

I just felt devasted like no one loves me not even my family.I didn't want to live anymore like this.I just felt
like I could die,I could kill myself somehow.All these
suicidal thoughts were just running through my mind.
And I didn't like it.As I had anxiety and Philophobia,the fear of not
being loved or not being loved back,I was having many
suicidal thoughts.

    So,I decided to do it.....

I opened my window and took a look outside.It was 10pm of night.So,the streets weren't so busy.I forced
out a smile and let my teardrop fall.I glanced back at my door and heard my sister telling mom and dad to go to sleep.I heard her saying "Hey Wooyeon,I know you have Philophobia and you are angry with dad.But please,at least let ME in..After hearing her voice,I became more sad.All I could was whisper

  "I'll miss you"

"Miss me???WOOYEON ARE YOU GONNA DO SOMETHING STUPID AGAIN!???PLEASE,DON'TT!!YOU WILL SURELY REGRET IT!!!!"She said as she was freaking out.

I chuckled in a very painful way as I went to take a rope from my store room.I hide it before cuz I thought I will be needing them..And the day has come......

"I love you sis...Please tell mom and dad that I love them as well,Especially Dad" I uttered those words before I threw the rope down.As our house was kinda small,it was easy to go down. I landed my foot on the ground and I went to the window of my parents room and opened the curtains and saw them sleeping peacefully.I whispered in a very small voice

   " I-I love you mom and dad...S-Sorry for being a burden
    to you d-dad"

I said as I wiped my tears...It was useless,they were still falling down on my cheeks.I suddenly looked around and quickly rushed out of the house,knowing my Sister will be coming for me to stop me.

I ran as fast as I could,my stomach was aching so bad but I still kept on running for a long time until I reached my destination,the river.

I climbed the bridge which was above the river and let the cold air hit my face as my tears fall down slowly one by one as I just stood there still,not having enough courage to jump off the bridge...I stayed there still for more than a minute just sobbing like a mess.But then,I decided to do it...

"Mom,Dad,Sis,Old friends, Ex Boyfriend..I still love you all even tho I don't show it but I guess you don't love me back,thats what I fear of the most,'not being loved back'...Some people,they have even bigger problems than me but some of them gather up the courage to live and don't die easily but I guess... I'm not them.I'm just a weak depressed girl who can't handle things...They give up easily..My problem isn't big at all,Its just that all my friends betrayed me and my boyfriend who I loved sooo much cheated on me...I was replaced from my friends and from by boyfriend cuz of a girl who is ofcourse prettier than me,she has a better body than me,shes more confident than me,she is rich and yeah she loves herself but me...I don't love myself.I don't have any of the qualities that she has.I'm just useless..Even my parents,I'm like a second option for them cuz my sister is perfect...She-she is extroverted and gets along with people well which I don't..You know what,I'm just a burden to my friends,boyfriend,family,to the world like my dad said,I'm just useless"

"I don't know why I'm even saying these things..Noone is even listening..Noone will even be sad when I die...They will just forget about me..."

I gathered up all my courage and stand still,ready to jump.

"BYE CRUEL WORLD"

A/N : THANKS YOU FOR READING THE FIRST  CHAPTER OF LOVE ME BACK ♡ ...IT MEANS A LOT TO ME
              THIS SERIES WAS INSPIRED BY
"Ink And Paper" by minho-the-meanie :)..Please check that out as well....Its just amazing UwU

                        Bye!!;D



         

    

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