Where Home Isn't | ✓

When Will You Watch

Finn has always had reminders about performing on stage because, from the very beginning, he had stage fright. For a while now, they are reminders to not show what is going on below. Normally, he runs through them once, but tonight, he doesn't feel calm.

Deep breaths, Finn. Don't think too much. Just sing and be happy. At least pretend to be. Smile. Don't forget that. It's for a few hours; you can do it.

He goes through these lines more than usual.

"You ready, Finn?" Danny asks.

"Yeah, yeah," he replies, not even listening to the question.

"Well, we're on. You've been here for a few minutes since we've been called," he says.

"Oh. Sorry. I just feel bad about the coffee shop girl," he lies.

His best friend looks at him intently before saying, "It's all right, mate. We have to get the show on the road, though."

"Yeah. Sorry," he repeats as they walk on stage.

"Hello, Boston!" he shouts into the microphone. "Sorry for the delay!"

"He was busy trying to look good for you guys," Danny says from his place.

A small chuckle rips through the crowd. Finn feels a little sick when he finally sees them.

"Uh - yeah so we are Blossoming Savages and we'll be starting off with 'Raging War'!" he shakily says.

"1, 2, 3," Ben counts off.

Finn struggles through, and barely makes it.

In the next few songs, he begins to slowly break. Finally, he starts to cry. He doesn't stop crying. He can't stop and cries through a few more songs.

He doesn't address it even though his friends try to.

"Mate, are you okay?" Danny asks between songs with his hand over the microphone. "You need a break?"

"I don't know what's wrong with me," he says quietly, but is amplified to the crowd because of his microphone.

Danny looks at him with worry, but his eyes shift to their audience as well.

"Few more songs, and if you can't make it through those, we're stopping the show," he says.

Finn nods in agreement.

"Sorry, guys," Danny says in his microphone, "Finnegan George here is just tired."

"Yeah. Tired of you talking," Ben says, "Play, you fool!"

He makes it through a song or two before he falls to the ground. From the ground, he just sings the last songs with little effort.

At the end of the show, all the boys say their farewells to Boston. When it is Finn's turn, he just says, "I just want to go home," before crying again.

He cries for his parents. He cries for his siblings. He cries for his Molly. He cries for the terrible weather of England. For the days before the band. For his band. For his fans. But mostly because of the audience that have just witnessed his ultimate downfall.