Game of Destiny

1.

Atlanta Georgia— Bankhead to be more specific. Growing up in a community of such poverty; they say you either get pregnant at sixteen or you die by eighteen. Well, I'm living proof that it's not always one of the two that unfairly decides your fate. Unlike many of the folks and teenagers here, I had a plan out. After I graduated from high school I was going to attend college and provide a way out for myself.

Being the oldest of four children was like playing an active 'mom' role. I lost my father to the jail system when I was eleven-years old, although our father-daughter relationship ended long before that. I watched my mother struggle to make ends meet; yet still managing to get by on her own with four children. Sadly, life shifted when she got introduced to drugs.

Now, I'm left to fend for myself, my two sisters, Deedra and De'Lanice— along with my younger brother, Darnell. I'm barley keeping myself together, so can you imagine having to care for three other human beings; well four, if you count our mama, Trina.

She spends most of her days on this pimp named Latrell corner. At night, she would come home high off drugs, passing out on our no good couch. My mama wasn't always like this. I don't know what happened. It's like after I graduated, she spiraled. As for me... Destiny, I'm a twenty-year old girl; eager to escape this chaos of a life I live.

Before my father got locked up, he taught me about survival and how I should always protect my siblings because I'm the oldest. I wouldn't say I grew up experiencing tough love— however, many of my life encounters as a child molded me to show love differently. I work a basic nine-to-five by day and at night, I'm bartending my ass off over at Exotic Air. I had to pull some strings just to get that job. Thanks to my home girl Ashanti, I was eventually able to secure my position at the nightclub.

"Mama over at Nia house, again." Deedra walked in the house. I sighed, looking up from my phone. "She starting again?" I questioned my sister. Deedra nodded, standing in the frame of the wooden brown door. I rolled my eyes, slipping my foot into my pink slides. I quickly followed her out the house.

Deedra and I are only two years apart in age. She stood at five foot five exactly, with a slim thick body and a pretty face that any dude would want to be seen with, but I always drilled her about the importance of not focusing on these no good boys in the hood.

As for me, standing at five foot four with curvy hips and skin like smooth chocolate. I'm melanin and proud— one thing my mama always taught me to embrace was the color of my skin. We hurried down the street; over to Nia's house. As we got closer we could hear our mothers loud mouth. This wasn't the first time I was called to bring my mama home. The drugs made her all types of crazy.

I walked up to the white porch, gently grabbing my mother by her hand, "Ma, why you out here causing a scene?" I asked. She looked me up and down once realizing it was me. "Excuse me, but I'm a grown ass bitch." She sassed. Nia looked over at me, helpless. She too, hated seeing my mama this way.

See, Nia and my mom were good friends, best friends once upon a time. They did everything together. But then my mama got hooked on drugs. Unfortunately, her crazy behavior led Nia to cut ties. Could you blame her? My mother was always doing and saying the craziest shit once under the influence of whatever she had taken. "Come on ma." I tugged at her arm, trying to pull her away from the yard.

She yanked her hand out of my hold, "No!" Trina turned back to face Nia, who was just standing there with no words to form. She felt hopeless for long time her friend. It was sad to see someone you love doing this to themselves. "Nia, you a fraud ass bitch!" Trina shouted. "Yep, that's right! You fake!" Nia only shook her head; which only angered my mama more.

"Mama! Please, stop!" Deedra begged, embarrassed because neighbors were now starting to come outside. Deedra was tired of our mother's antics, but she didn't leave her hanging, ever. The both of us still have hope for her but our other two siblings— they done lost all faith in her. Darnell doesn't even talk to her anymore, and Lani looks at her like she's a disgrace; which I can't blame them for. I've reassured my younger siblings time and time again that it's okay to feel some type of resentment towards her.

"Tri, go home... sleep this off." Nia finally broke her silence. Mama scoffed, "Bitch, ion gotta listen to you. Where were you when I needed a friend?!" Mama looked at her with saddened eyes. We could never understand where her anger towards Nia came from because neither one of them spoke on their falling out. "Ma, she's right. Come on." I pulled her again. "So, you on that bitch side?!" She snagged her neck at me. "No. I'm on your side, you know that."
I told her.

Deciding to comply, Trina turned her back, walking away from the house and heading down the street. Deedra walked closely behind her. We both knew it was best to give her some space. She wasn't necessarily a hot-head but the drugs made everything from her behavior to her mental state unpredictable.

"I'm sorry she came here like this, again." I used my manicured fingers to scratched my forehead. My mother can be an embarrassment often times, which is why I hated being known as her daughter.
"It's okay, Destiny. I know it's just that stuff she take." Nia shook her head. This had become a regular thing for my mama once she found comfort in all the things Latrell introduced her to. She would then get high, and sometimes end up on Nia's front porch. In many ways, the falling-out between the two best friends played another part in my mother's addiction with drugs; at least that's what I thought.

"I'll see you around." I waved bye. "Be safe, sweetie." Nia called out. I nodded, slipping her a faint smile. Making my way back to our house, the cool July breeze blew on my skin. The ice cream truck did it's daily rounds on the block. Kids played jump rope on the sidewalk while others played hop scotch in the street. Old women sat out on their porches, gossiping amongst one another.

When I make it out, I'm probably miss this place more than I intend to; I won't lie. The hood taught me how to grind for more. It's sad that one day; I'm going to leave this all behind, but there ain't no way I'm going to stay here and turn grey. A bitch like me, gotta make it out. There ain't no room for failure.