Confused

~27~

Harry's POV

I stared at the beautiful boy beside me. I realized I was falling hard for him. He's really my everything now. My family is back in Holmes Chapel and I only have the boys and Niall. But actually Niall more. I am scared what will happen if I told him my feelings. We share our kisses even we had... Uh, I am also so awkward saying that now. Anyways, we had it twice and I trust Niall, like he was all my life. What makes me curse is when he freezes when I tell him I 'like' him. To be honest I always meant the word 'love' because it was the right word to say. We aren't even boyfriends! It's really making me want to punch the wall multiply times. I love Niall and I want to admit it freely, but his dad stops him from loving anyone. It's like his dad is ruling him. I need to talk about it with him, but not right now because I know it will make him scared.

"What are you staring at?" He suddenly spoke bringing me out of my trance.

"At how perfect you are" I grinned when he blushed. He leaned in bumping our noses together.

"Wanna go out with me?" He asked and I smile this time peeking his lips.

"Sure" I said and he hugged me closer. I just love how close we are. If I only had the chance to tell him.......

"What are you trying to tell me?" He asked curiously. Oops, maybe I was thinking out loud.

"I wanted to know where we are going?" I flashed him a fake smile because I lied. I feel very bad about it but if I told him he'll be teary and I don't want that.

"Surprise" he said and I nod excepting it patiently. I stood up and he followed my action.

"I'll do breakfast" I said and went to the kitchen.

"Hello, Haz!" Louis greeted me and I realized I was at Liam and Louis'. Oh, That's another surprise.

"Morning, Lou" I greeted back searching for a pan.

"I'll do it. You go sit with the lads" he said and I smile thanking him. I heard whispered from the room me and Niall slept in. My curiosity won over me this time and I tip toed to the door.

"Niall, you need to go to your family with Harry" Liam's voice, I recognized it.

"Don't you think this is wrong, Li? If my dad saw him he'll start to spit fire on Harry like a wild dragon" Niall said his voice showing pure worry.

"It's the only way to sort your relationship" Liam sighed.

"When?" Niall sighed.

"Maybe after tomorrow or tomorrow. You have to tell him" Liam said.

"But Liam, this will be very messed up. I am not even ready to come out as gay at once in front of my DAD?" He raised his voice a little.

"Shhh, he can hear you from here. This is the only chance if you want to be with him. Think about it Niall. Who knows, love never lasts forever but if you did want to love you have to face your fears and step up for the one you love" Liam advised Niall and I could feel my eyes start to water. Liam was 100% right. I thank him for this. I am ready facing his family telling them me and Niall are together. I don't care if his dad slapped me, what matters is Niall. I want him to be mine before he falls out of my grip. I want him to be in love. I want him to move on. He dated girls and all of them dumped him. It's like I am the only guy he is dating now and I want to change him. I want to change his love life. I want to change his past. I want his dad to realize how much love I give his son. And if he beats Niall, I swear I will show him how to feel the pain he gives people. His dad is heartless. How could he slap his brother because he was gay? It's not like he owned him. It's non of his fucking business. That's nonsense!!!!!!

I went out of my thoughts when I heard footsteps go to the door. I run down the stairs quickly but quiet too. I stumble on my own bare feet and land on the couch. I cough and open my phone as if nothing happened.

"Good morning, Harry" Liam greeted.

"Morning, Li" I greet back and sit properly to let them sit beside me.

"Breakfast is ready, guys" we went to the kitchen when Louis yelled this sentence. As we were eating, I could feel his eyes on me all the time. I could feel what he's thinking. He's afraid to tell me that we'll visit his family. I look at Louis and Liam as they whisper things to each other. I sigh and look at Niall who blushes immediately. I smirk and give him a kiss on the cheek. When we finished the breakfast Liam and me cleaned the dishes. I walk back to the 2 others to see Louis was talking with someone and Niall was deep in thoughts staring in space. I sigh walking to him and putting a hand on his knee. He snapped out of it and looked at me with a sparkle shinning in his eyes. I smile warmly and lean in giving him small peeks on his lips. He smiled through the kiss and pulled me closer by putting his hand behind my neck. I scot closer and he lays on top of me.

"Guys we're going out" Liam informed.

"Have fun" Niall shouted and continued kissing me. The place was silent only our sloppy kiss was heard. The noises of it made my stomach flutter and my heart race. I capture his top lip in mine and he captured his on my bottom lip. It felt mature and real. I felt love before but not as strong as that, it's like we are perfectly made for each other. Like 2 different book with 2 different stories, but our love is shared although we didn't confess all of our feelings now. I am fine with it but I want him mine. Mine forever. I want him to be my boyfriend. I want him to feel free to be gay or bi. I don't care what his dad says about me, all I care about is Niall and I.

I hope we'll be fine with everything we go through.

"I am exhausted!" Niall mumbled and I look at him with confusion.

"If you don't want to go out. We can go back at mine" I suggested and he nods lazily.

"I am sorry. Promise tomorrow!" He said and I chuckle.

"It's ok. If you don't feel good we can go home and have a movie night"

"Yeees!" He jumped up, helping me up and running upstairs. I put my shoes, scarf, gloves and my thick coat on. Niall copied my actions and we went out. It's still the near end of December so it's still snowing. The most amusing thing is the snow is a lot. It reaches under my knees and I find that hard to walk on.

"Snow is a lot today" Niall grabbed some snow. I was looking around when I felt someone put snow under my shirt.

"Ahhhhh" I screamed in frustration and he laughed when I did some loop dance.

"Niall!!!!" I yelled and he ran away. It was a 30 minutes walk to my house but when you run after your annoying -to be boyfriend- it's like 10 minutes. I created a ball and put in his pants pockets. He screamed in the cold contact with his warm body. I smirked when he did the same as me.

"You deserve it" Niall stomped to me and pulled me into a kiss. Hm, he wants to be kinky today. Before he deepens the kiss I pulled away and ran to my front door.

"Movie night is on!" I said and he laughed running after me.

"Such a tease" he told me and I smirk putting my coat away. We sit on the couch and I walk to the kitchen to grab a package of haribo. When I walked back to the couch Niall jumped up whimpering. I make him face my back because he won't have anything from it. With a smirk on my face I look over my shoulder to see him wrapping his arms around my waist.

"C'mon Harry...just one? Or maybe twenty?.... Maybe the whole package?" He begged and I shake my head stubbornly. Next step Niall jumped on my back and I let the bag fall and hold him in my arms.

"You saved me" he chuckled.

"Yeah, you're more important than haribo" I said and he leaned in kissing me fully on the lips.

"Movie or nah?" I asked and he licked my bottom lip.

"I'll suggest a snog for today, daddy!" He said and I smirk carrying him to the bedroom.

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A/N:
No smut, sorry!
It's just a hard moment!
I have to focus on Niall's family now.
Sorry again.

-nancy xoxo