KOTLC: Baking with Pride

> EPISODE TWO

Dexter Alvin Dizznee-Vacker was going to need glasses.

He sighed, rubbing his eyes as he shut down his PC. He spent most of his time on the thing; for work, for fun, out of pure boredom. And if he wasn't squinting at his computer screen, he was on his phone. Or struggling to see through his goggles as he messed around in the basement.

Needless to say, Dex's vision would be atrocious by the time he was 30, nevermind 40.

"Ah," Dex muttered to himself. "Let's not think about being 40 just yet ..."

The prospect of being 40 was terrifying, that was for certain. But Dex had to admit it didn't seem that bad, so long as he had his ridiculous model of a husband at his side.

Who was currently very distressed over this morning's baking episode.

Dex blew out a breath, stumbling to his feet as he checked the time. 19:46 -- Sophie and Biana would be arriving soon for dinner. And then Dex could finally convince his stupid Wonderboy that his baking show wasn't going to flunk.

With some effort, he launched himself out of his office and poked his head inside the massive kitchen. Fitz was preparing dinner, humming along to the radio in a deep, sweet voice that proved he might be a good singer if he wasn't woefully tone-deaf. Dex giggled to himself, turning to retreat back to the office, and stopped.

Was that ... barking?

"Iggy," he declared with a wide smile, and he ran to the front door, throwing it open in anticipation of seeing the stinky dog, his (adoptive) cousin, and her wife.

"SOPH! BIANA!" he shouted, waving his arms above his head. He suddenly remembered his bum outfit and winced in hindsight, knowing Biana would have a lot more to say about it than her brother.

"DEX!" he heard Sophie holler back, and the young woman herself appeared a moment later, practically diving into Dex's arms and reacquainting him with her classic tackle-hug.

"Ack!" Dex nearly toppled over, which would have been disastrous, considering the natural clumsiness of Sophie Foster. "Happy to see you too, Soph!"

"Hey, don't forget me!" Biana called. Dex heard a quick beep! as Biana armed their car and excited barking as Iggy reacted to the smell of food in the distance.

As Dex carefully extracted himself from his cousin's death grip and helped her into the house before she could trip over the threshold, the dog himself raced into sight, tugging at his leash with energetic yips. Sophie's childhood dog, the Boston Terrier was still quite spry for his age, and he still possessed plenty of cuddles -- not to mention powerful farts.

"Yo, Iggy!" Dex knelt on the porch, opening his arms. "C'mere, it's your favourite human!"

Iggy tilted his head at him. Dex wasn't sure if he should be offended or terrified that Iggy might have understood him.

"Please?" he tried, and Iggy suddenly barrelled into his arms. Dex laughed and petted the dog's head. His fur still shimmered from Dex's last dog-makeover.

"Dex," the exasperated voice of Biana Vacker began, "what on earth are you wearing?"

(to clarify, both sophie and biana kept their family names, while fitz and dex hyphenated theirs. no particular reason.)

"Clothes," Dex answered awkwardly. He was used to Biana's fashion-related lectures, but he never really paid much mind to his outfits when he was at home. Which was admittedly quite often, seeing as he worked from home.

"Oh, Dex," Biana sighed, ruffling his hair as she clutched Iggy's leash. "You never change. Literally."

A startled yelp that sounded suspiciously similar to Iggy's yips sounded from the kitchen. It seemed Fitz had become the next victim to Sophie's tackle-hug.