Me:And here we will review what many believe to be one of the greatest games of all time: Grand Theft Auto 5.
Onyx:And they wouldn't be wrong. This game set records in its first week and its just an overall amazing game.
Me:We'd be here all day listing the game's accolades, but y'all came for a review. So let's get to the revi...
Pearl:WAIT A MINUTE!
Me:*sighs*
Pearl:Is this the game where you do horrid things such as killing those "prostitutes"?
Amethyst:Nah, Pearl. Let's just check it...
Connie:Yes. It's got a bunch of bad stuff in it. I don't think Steven should be playing it.
Me:Bitch, you ain't his mother!
Pearl:Is that so? Steven, I don't think you need to be here for this review.
Amethyst:The hell? Steven is 16, not 6!
Lapis:Yeah. If Steven shouldn't be here, neither should Connie!
Connie:What??
Pearl:Steven, go out for this one.
Steven:I have to leave, but Connie gets to stay? She's younger than me!
Connie:I'm also not the one going to therapy...
Peridot:You human bitch.....
Steven:Ugh. *leaves*
*We(Except Pearl( glare at Connie!*
Connie:What?!?
Me:Hey Connie? What sound does Dynamite make?
Connie:Bang?
*Gun Cocks*
*BANG!*
Me:Now then. Let's review the game.
Pearl:YOU JUST KILLED CONNIE!!
Lapis:Like I said: If Steven can't be in here, neither should Connie! Now shut up or I'll deal with you personally, Pearl!!
Me:Let's review:
*We play the story*
Me:Alright. So who do you guys like the best so far out of the 3 MCs?
Onyx:Franklin. Out of the 3 of them, he seems to be the most level headed.
Amethyst:Level headed, Schemevel Headed! I like Trevor! Gimme mah chaos!
Pearl:Michael is my favorite. Yes, he may be shady, but he seems to be the one using more of his smarts.
Me:Alright. Who do you all hate the most?
Onyx:Lamar.
Me:Same. Yeah, he's Franklin's best friend, but he causes more issues for him than anything else. And dear God, I hate that feminist Aunt of Franklin's.
Onyx:Yeah. She's a pain in the ass. All those "Women Empowerment Exercises" she does...
Peridot:How does screaming like a maniac come off as a sign of empowerment?
Amethyst:Human females are weird.
Me:Then why did you Gems take the forms of...know what? Let me stop and just move onto the Online portion of this game..
Amethyst:Whoa! You can team up with friends online?!?
Me:Yep! You can race, do heists, missions....
Onyx:Or just do what Jeremy does and satisfy your bloodlust.
Me:Hey! I told you; I didn't kill any of the strippers!
Onyx:Know why:
*Everyone but Pearl laughs!*
Me:What? I'm just saying that I only kill if someone tries to kill me.
Onyx:Dude, you blew someone's car up just because they liked Connie! And even more than that: You took out a group of other SU fans who were on there just because they ship Connverse!
Me:That's true, but they started with me! Said that I was crazy for not liking Connie! Well I showed that SOB just how crazy I am!
Onyx:That you did....*laughs* But what's your excuse for the 30 other players who weren't even involved?
Me:Collateral damage.
Pearl:You both are depraved.
Amethyst:And Awesome!
Me:Why thank you!
Onyx:Uh before we end this, you gonna revive Connie?
Me:Uh....Keep em coming guys! Thanks to dirtrock1252 for the request!
YOU ARE READING
Steven and the SU Crew Review Video Games!
RandomSteven reviews Video Games with his crew!
