Peter Parker Oneshots

Mango Cheese p1

Ships II Alex/Magnus 

Warnings II Falling from high heights

The Avengers watch the news - Mayor Alex Fierro is causing chaos. They arrange a meeting.

The screen fuzzed and colours fizzled as the camera finally focused in on a distressed looking news anchor, Menisome Green, who was swearing harshly at someone offscreen.

"You absolute Naglfar we need to get rolling!"

"The camera is rolling ma'am." Said an offscreen voice. "No need to stress."

"Right, right." Miss Green fixed her fiery red hair back and turned to the camera with a frazzled smile. "Today, we are going into the White House to find with inside scoop on the how Head of Medical and Mental Health, Magnus Chase, was quite literally thrown out."

The camera cut out and Bruce frowned. "Hey Tony did you know about this latest political scandal?"

"No, but I'll grab the popcorn!"

MInutes later, the screen was still blank, and Tony returned not only with popcorn, but with the rest of the Avengers in tow. "I bribed them with butter popcorn."

"Yes but you only bought one tub -"

"It's miNE!" Declared Clint, snatching it away.

"nO -" Tony started, but the TV audio began to play.

"So," Miss Green sounded flustered, "I've found the crash site and I'm looking around for a Magnus Chase for his side of the story."

"You have no audio!" came a shout.

"Seriously, Albert, am I paying you to mess around?"

"No, we lost Bethany." The voice paused, almost thoughtfully. "I think it was somewhere near the knife wielding guards."

"Oh, shame. Would you be a dear and go get her camera then?"

THere was a skittering sound and the audio cut again.

"This is better than a soap opera," Clint smiled. "Does anyoe else think the news anchor resembles Mallory Keen, Head Of The Ant-Terrorism Act?"

"Nah," said Tony.

A chorus of 'nah's followed.

It was then that not only the audio, but the video on the TV cut back on.

The frazzled new anchor stood over an unconscious body on the ground. "I've found Magnus Chase," she shoved her mic in the unconscious body's face, "what is your side of the story Mr Chase?"

When no reply came she lent down and picked up the form on the floor, which should clearly have been in hospital.

"Mr Chase?" she shook him. "Magnus?"

His form remained lifeless. So she shoved him into the wall. "Beantown wake the hell up."

"Hmmmmm," said the man in question, "MAC, issat you?"

"No," the news anchor straightened her stance, "my name is Menisome Green and I'm here to take your statement on what happened earlier this morning."

"Ok MAC," he sighed, still minorly delirious. "Well when I woke up Alex was in the shower so I knocked on the door and -"

"No!" The anchor turned flaming red, almost the same shade as her hair. "When you were thrown out of the tower!"

"Well Alex said something super insincere like, I love you Maggie but this is blasphemy, turned into an African Elephant, and ran me out the window."

"beANTOWN! You're live on the news."

"Oh that was all totally metaphorical then."

Nat switched off the TV, "did that seem suspicious to anyone?"

"Nah," said Clint digging around in the popcorn box for any last stragglers.

This time, however, it was followed by a chorus of yes's.

"beTRAYAL!" Declared Clint.

"I say we invite the ruling council for lunch," Tony said. "It'll give us a chance to . . . get to know them."

"You're trying to get them to spill the tea, aren't you?"

"Of course."