Chapter 14

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Chapter 14:

Expectation vs. reality is something I constantly struggling with. It’s like I weave these brilliant ideas in my head and when I try to portray them in everyday life, they turn out absolutely terrible. Why is it so hard for life to go the way I want it?

For example, sleepovers. I always imagined pink. Everywhere. There would be bowls of yummy snacks, movies, and a girly pillow fight with feathers swinging like pendulums in the air. But reality is the exact opposite of that.

Cecily, Maria, and I lied down on the carpeted floor in my room, our eyes glued to the TV screen. Well, glued to Channing Tatum’s abs actually, but we were all in a trance. The three of us sat in shorts, our hair in buns, each of us shoving popcorn into our mouths. I came to the conclusion that most of the time, life isn’t as glamorous as we want it to be.

Normally, I hated sleepovers. I liked to stretch out in my bed and have the freedom to fart as much as I wanted, but I couldn’t do that with other people around. But tonight, I made an exception to spend some time with the girls. Valarie was invited, but declined rather rudely. Whatever. That bitch could suck it.

Honestly, I tried to distract myself with whatever I could: movies, attempts at working out, sleepovers. I tried to avoid Luke at all costs. Whenever he texted, I told him I couldn’t talk. Whenever he wanted to hang out, I told him I had plans. I basically had restricted myself from leaving my room. As for the reason why, I couldn’t face him after going on a date with Hayden.

Hayden was just . . . amazing. I wanted to like him how he liked me, but I couldn’t, and Luke was the reason why. It felt like I had to ask permission to see other people and there were these odd feelings that I had towards Luke. It was all extremely confusing.

“And then my grandma started twerking in the middle of the mall,” Cecily exclaimed.

I snapped back into reality. “What?” I asked appalled.

She and Maria exchanged glances. “Told you so.”

“What just happened? I hear something about your grandma twerking,” I said, shaking my head.

Cecily sighed. “I knew you weren’t listening! I had to get your attention some way.”

“Sorry,” I mumbled. “My mind’s in other places.”

“You were thinking about Luke, weren’t you?” Maria asked.

I shook my head. “No! He’s my best friend! Why would you think that?”

Once again, the two exchanged glances and looked at me like I was stupid. “Because it’s so obvious that you do!”

“It is?” I asked, my nervousness levels rising in my bloodstream.

“Aha!” Cecily exclaimed, pointing her perfectly manicured finger at me. “So you do like him?”

I groaned. “Okay, yeah. Kind of. It’s not my fault that he turned like, ridiculously hot over the past six years. But is it that obvious?”

Maria giggled. “To us, yes. To guys, that’s a different story. They are so oblivious to what’s in front of them. They don’t know how to read clues. If it’s not right in front of them, they’ll never see it.”

Cecily nodded. “Just tone down the googly-eyes just a smidge and you’ll be good. Why are you so reluctant to reject your feelings for him?”

“Because,” I whined, “he’s my best friend. It’s weird. Plus, I just went out with Hayden this past weekend and I kind of like him too and I just don’t know how I feel about anything anymore. Actually, confused. I feel confused.”

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