salute ➳ 〚h.s.〛 〚a.u.〛

things you said when you thought it was over - (an extra)

"Hi petal - er, um, sorry. Hi Piper, it's me. Harry. Well, you probably already knew that. I think by now you'd recognize my voice - always said you liked it but, um, that's not why I called. Obviously not. Why would I call to talk about my voice? You won't speak to me as it is but I, uh, I don't blame you for that. I said some pretty nasty things and I'm not surprised that you're angry at me and I wouldn't be surprised either if you'd hung up on this message by now. Oh, who am I kidding? You're probably long gone and I'm just talking to myself at this point. Why would you want anything to do with a wanker like me, right? Shit. *heavy sigh* I - I'm not sure why I'm calling really. You probably don't want to hear from me it's just... I've just had a really rough time today and I was hoping... well, I just wanted to hear, um... never mind. I wanted a distraction I think. I've managed to do a real number on my shoulder and every time I think about it, it hurts even worse so I've been trying to keep my mind off of it and you've always been my best distraction *laughs uncomfortably, clears throat* I'm in Minsk, remember? For my mission. I told you a couple of weeks ago before everything that happened at... you know. Um, yeah, it's been a bit rough here. Had an altercation and I've fucked my shoulder up real bad and I managed to get stabbed in the leg which isn't usual for me. I just didn't even see them coming... had a lot on my mind, I guess but, um, I'm okay. I'm not fatally wounded. Should be fine. Just, uh, just tired and I really miss you a lot, petal, and I'm really stupid. So fucking stupid and I wish I could take it all back because I didn't mean any of it, not a word. I was just... I was scared and everything was moving so quickly and, christ, you only barely got downstairs in time and I think of what could have happened and I just can't even breathe when I do. I can't live without you. I just can't do it. I - um *clears throat* uh, right. Where was I? Right, I'm in Minsk but I'm getting the next flight out. A little late because I had to try and get this knife out of my leg and Niall gives shit instructions over the phone *chuckles* but you know that better than anyone right? So. Right. Should be home within a few hours and I'm going to need Niall to set my shoulder but after that, I'm going to come straight to you because I've been thinking and there are a lot of things I want to say to you, even if you don't want to hear them. You probably don't want to hear them. You're probably done with me altogether and you'd be right to throw me out because I was a huge fucking idiot and the things I said were unforgivable and how could you still want me after I acted like that? I wish I knew how to apologize but it feels too big for just an I'm sorry. Way too big. I don't know what to do and I wish I could just make it right again because I miss you, Piper, so much and I lo-"

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