One Of Us

A World Worth Fighting For

Breakfast was a leisurely affair, they were determined to make the most of it for they knew that their beloved but demanding children would return later that afternoon and though it was not planned Bjorn couldn't help but be grateful for the time that they had been given, he would be sure to thank his parents sincerely. They had hinted that they knew more than he had ever told them and they'd clearly seen that he needed time alone with Anna, he knew that they both adored being parents, him more than he had the first time round and he would always feel guilty that he hadn't been the Papa Linda and Christian deserved but he would make up for it now, with Anna's help. He would also make sure that Emma and baby Anna never suffered again, he could only hope that with all the love he had to give with Anna that Emma's scars would fade with time.
"Penny for them" Anna murmured as she sat back down with 2 fresh teas and swung her legs up onto his lap, he grinned as he stroked her leg "I've loved this time with you Anna, I needed it" "We both needed it" she corrected softly "I didn't realise how mumsy I'd become" Bjorn choked on his tea and burst out laughing "Anna, you've never been mumsy in your life, you radiate sex appeal and that bottom is most definitely not mumsy. Neither are the spikes" he waved a hand at her hair "there's nothing about you that's mumsy. Mama Earth maybe but never mumsy" she chuckled "thank you, I don't like it short anymore I'm going to try and grow it a bit before I do the shoot for the album" he settled and put his feet up on the other chair holding her feet in place "What's the album called?" he asked genuinely interested she snorted then giggled "it's somewhat ironic now but I can't change it at this late stage" he lifted a questioning brow "it's called 'I Stand Alone'" she told him a bit nervously "and I've finished the children's songs with Christian. I wanted to treat him the same as Linda, show there was no favouritism but we definitely don't need to do it again. It was fun but he didn't enjoy it like Linda did" she sighed "he's getting so grown up Bjorn, he's a mini me and Linda is a mini you. Not so mini though" she smiled "it's the circle of life Anna" Bjorn reminded her gently "it's what we do, what parents do then we watch them fly" Anna nodded "I know"
There was a comfortable silence that both of them enjoyed Anna eventually stretched her legs and pointed her toes into Bjorn's crotch which got his immediate attention "We need to plan stuff Bjorn but I find myself wanting to make the most of the time alone that we have before the kids come home. Isn't it funny how I got used to no sex and now you've awoken a monster" Bjorn grinned "Never a monster Anna, a beautiful sexy woman who is my lifetime addiction, one who has spent the best part of two decades tying me up in knots and keeping me in a near constant state of arousal. Anna you are many things but you're not a monster" "I have something to say" she offered smiling Bjorn rolled his eyes good naturedly, definitely a thing "Come here" he said patting his knee "I suddenly find that you're too far away" he watched as she got up and then he pulled her gently down onto his lap and once they were both comfortable and settled Bjorn said "Will I like it?" and chuckled "yes, I'll probably never live it down but you deserve it" Bjorn frowned in confusion "I don't......" he started and paused as Anna smoothed away his frown lines with a gentle finger "I want to say thank you. I want to say thank you for thinking your way through last night and this morning, I want to thank you for treating me so carefully and giving me such a wonderful experience. It could have gone horribly wrong but you didn't let it, you didn't let me be a coward, you forced me to face up to my issues. I am damaged but you cared enough to ignore all that and work through it with me" tears sprang to his eyes "Oh Anna, you don't have to thank me, it was my absolute joy, my pleasure. I should be on my knees thanking you for trusting me. Your issues are my fault and you won't persuade me otherwise but I'm going to fix them all. You aren't damaged Anna" he reassured her "Oh I am" she retorted "I'm damaged for anyone else but you. You didn't give up on me, you stayed with me and I can't tell you what that means. There isn't another person on this earth that I would trust enough Bjorn to do what you did but its my turn to reassure you. Now you've got me over the first hurdle I don't want you to restrain yourself, I don't want you to treat me any differently to how you did. I want to be able to tell you all the things I fantasised about when we were apart. I want you to tell me those ones you hinted at. Bit by bit, little by little" He nodded gently "OK, bit by bit though" he agreed "I don't want anything to scare you" his eyebrows suddenly shot up "What did you say to me then?" "I said I don't want you to hold back" she repeated "No, no, no" he dismissed impatiently "not that bit" she frowned in confusion "you said you fantasised when we weren't together. About what?" he demanded and he became noticeably amused at her crimson blush "don't laugh at me" she snapped "Oh baby, I'm not laughing at you. I'm not" he hastened to reassure her "though you are utterly adorable when you blush like that. No, I'm laughing at the state we both got ourselves into. You can't imagine the amounts of times I thought of you, fantasised about the things we did, the things we never got round to and the ones I had always planned to do with you and the new ones I thought up."" You thought of me? I'd never have guessed. All you did was glare at me and shout" "I can't deny it, but you know why now don't you?" he squeezed her tightly and kissed her gently "I thought of you too, I remembered what we were and wondered if I was looking back on us with rose tinted glasses" she admitted "you weren't" Bjorn told her contentedly "no, obviously not" she replied with a slight smile in her voice "I fantasised about you too" she confessed bravely "about things I could only do with you. I wouldn't have been brave enough to ask anyone else or tell anyone else" she shrugged "it wouldn't have worked with anyone else anyway" "Bloody hell Anna. WHY couldn't we have been this honest back then? None of this ever would have happened" he grumbled and pulled her closer for a kiss "because when we had time I was too young and shy to tell you, maybe we were both too young. Settling into a young marriage is hard, when we were settled and living that lovelife we both needed the world went mad and we forgot how to be married to each other, we were married to ABBA and the world and we had no time to repair us, no time to try and by the time we realised that it was all worth fighting for it was too late. We'd imploded and then we divorced ABBA too" "You've really given this some thought haven't you?" he murmured "For too many years Bjorn, I didn't ever think we'd have this chance. I didn't think ever that we would even manage to sort us out. For a long time we couldn't even be civil and it wasn't amicable" "No, it wasn't and that was mostly my doing. I'm sorry, I'm sorry that I put you through all that so quickly. My monstrous ego was proving you a point and look where it got me" he kissed her again "I have to be honest with you though Bjorn there was a part of me that thought of you because I loved you and I couldn't imagine ever not. The other part of all my self analysis was to try and be happy, I hoped I wouldn't be alone all my life and I didn't want to be such a liability the next time around if I found someone who could actually cope with me" he sighed as he fought the immediate surge of anger and jealousy because she was right "Anna, you aren't a liability, you never were" he sighed "but it turned out that it didn't matter, it was never going to happen, it would never have been right" she carried on like he hadn't spoken "and I'm selfish enough to be relieved, delighted, proud and so fucking grateful Anna that you feel that it IS right with me. I thank every single moon, star and universe that we've been given this chance. We won't waste it Anna darling, I won't ever let you go. You don't need someone to cope with you, you're not a liability. You're mine. I promise that you will never be alone again. What was it we said all those months ago? I'd rather fight with you all the time than be without you. There's no one else that I ever want to fight with and no one else that I ever want to share my life with" he interrupted her firmly Anna burst into unexpected tears and her arms tightened around him as she sobbed. He soothed her gently "listen to me Anna Bella, listen" he repeated gently "I don't want you to cry anymore, we've both cried enough. This weekend has been about healing for both of us in so many different ways and it's always going to be a work in progress" he held up a hand at her immediate protest "Anna I don't mean anything bad by it, relationships are a forever work in progress, even people who've been married for 50 years still work at it baby and for us now working on it means stepping forward hand in hand with our tribe and building a new world on the foundations of the old one. They are strong those foundations Anna, the love makes them strong. Working on it means you telling me the first of your fantasies and me taking you upstairs before the kids come home and making it come true for us both because I owe you everything and I want to be part of every single one of your fantasies" he wiped her tears with his fingers and grinned at her "and I'm so fucking turned on its untrue. You fantasising about me? Who knew!!! I can't wait. Its a bloody dream come true" she grinned back "I love this" she whispered "and working on it means we never give up again baby, no matter what happens. I want this world with you, its a world worth fighting for" he told her firmly so she didn't wait, she whispered in his ear, bit her lip and waited nervously for his response "My god Anna, you were born for me my beautiful girl" was his flustered response. She hopped off his lap with a relieved grin "I surely was Ulvaeus, I promise I'll be gentle with you..... this time"