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"Why would i go with him? Who is he anyway?"

A silence occupied the whole room, they all look at Oikawa who just talked. His expression has a mix of confusion and irritation as he fix his things in his bag. Oikawa knows that the three people that is occupying in his room is staring at him, both in shock and hurt in their faces.

"I told you, he's suga-" Iwaizumi's sentence was cut with Oikawa's glare, "I know who he is. My point is, I don't know what he is to me. All i know is he is Daichi's bestfriend so why would i go with a stranger and sleep there?"

Seeing that the situation is completely hopeless, iwaizumi turn to sugawara who's completely frozen on his feet, staring at his lover, eyes filled with hurt but once he noticed Iwaizumi's look on him. He smiled.

"It's okay, Iwa." Daichi wraps his arms around his bestfriend, he felt suga's shoulder shake, but he still looking at iwaizumi with a smile, "Just take care of him. He's right. I wouldn't want to stay with a stranger if i am in his place"

Sugawara is surprised on how his voice doesn't shake as he talk, "Suga-" He turns to Daichi this time, eyes filled with tears. "Daichi. Please?" With a sigh, Daichi nodded and Sugawara pulls his phone, checking the time and he turns to Oikawa this time, looking completely bothered and annoyed with the drama that is happening around him.

"I'll go now, i have to meet a friend. I'm sorry if i cannot accompany you to iwa's home." The excuse is too obvious. He knows but he needed to go out from this room especially now that his lover can't look at him straight in the eye. That Oikawa doesn't even look at him, he just mumbled a soft, "it's fine" Sugawara nodded. He felt Daichi's arm around him tightened. He felt the urge to hate daichi's comfortable arm around him this time. It makes him want to bawl his eyes in front of the man he loves but then, he gulps before talking once again.

"I'll visit you sometimes. Take care, Oikawa-san" with that, he proceeded to give his farewell to the couple who accompanied him there and walks away from the room, surprisingly his legs are still strong enough to walk to the nearest restroom and there, he pour his tears out, he didn't forbid the sobs to come out from his mouth. He let it all out, the emotions that he tries to conceal, he let it all out.

Back in the room, Oikawa looks at the couple who's still staring at the door as if they both want to follow the silver haired outside. What's with that sugawara? the two is too focus on him. With an irritation, he let out a soft tsk. "Are we going or not?" He asked the two who just came from their senses. Iwaizumi frowns at him. "Let's go."

Oikawa stands up, taking his belongings from the bed and stares at the ring on the side table together with his broken phone. He takes it and looks the ring on his palm, the urge to wear it is too strong so he slides it on his finger, a smile crept from his face, feeling the sense of comfort that the ring is wrapped perfectly around his finger but confusion immediately wiped the happiness that he felt. What's with this ring and why i feel so happy about it? He asked to himself as he takes the broken phone from the table, asking his bestfriend and his lover to go out from the room.

The ride from home is extremely exhausting for sugawara. Even though he already poured out the tears in the hospital's restroom a while ago, it seems like his eyes are still not tired from crying. Another set of tears blurred his eyesight. He sobbed quietly in the side on the bus that he is riding at the moment. He doesn't care if the passengers are staring at him. He just need to pour it all out.

It's his fault anyway. The whole situation is his fault. He shouldn't asked Oikawa to buy the things that he needed to buy. He blames his body that has been too exhausted to buy his medications. He blames his weak self. He blames his self.

This is all his fault. He shouldn't cry because this is all his fault anyway.


Iwaizumi opens the door for them. "Feel at home." He mumbles as he takes off his shoes. He follows his bestfriend and looks around the house. It feels nostalgic. The familiarity flooded in his veins. He has been there, he knows. It's his bestfriend's house anyway.

("Iwaizumi and Daichi is so great right? Look at the colors of their living room. It's so homey. It feels so comfortable." A chuckle came out from Tooru's mouth.

"Don't worry, our home will be too homey and comfortable than theirs so you wouldn't want to leave."

"I would never leave you though. Even the house is too small for the both of us. As long as i am with you, everything will be fine.")

"Tooru. Oikawa. Shittykawa. Hey" he blinks, he looks at his bestfriend, iwaizumi is looking at him with an anxious expression from his face. "Are you okay?" Daichi beside him asked and Tooru nodded with a shy grin, hands moves from the back of his neck, rubbing it as he says, "maybe i really like your house. It looks awesome! Can't help to stare at it" Iwaizumi lets out a shaky sigh. "I thought something happened." Iwaizumi holds his shoulders, staring right in his eyes. "If you remember something or anything or if you want to ask. You can tell me. Okay?" Oikawa nodded. "Yes yes. I will"

However, the voice in his head feels so familiar. It seems like he heard it somewhere. He doesn't know if it's the familiarity of the voice is the one he is hearing or that he already heard the beautiful voice from his time. One question keep bugging his mind. Who are you?

Sugawara lays down on his bed, hugging the pillow beside him. His scent. It's fading. Tears are pooling in his eyes once again. He's crying again. He knows. His eyes hurts too much for crying for the past hours- no. He's been crying eversince that he received the call from the hospital.

"H-hello?" He answers the call with a shaky voice. It's been hours since Tooru came out from the house. He is getting worried and now, He received an unknown number.

"You're Oikawa Tooru's emergency contant so we called youPlease come to the hospital immediately, he is in the emergency room right now-"

Before Koushi can even hear the whole statement of the person from the other line, his shaky voice cut them off, asking "W-what hospital? Where?"


Eversince that day Oikawa was admitted in the hospital, he's always there. Crying in regret and falling asleep while holding Tooru's pale hand afterwards. He is there. Every moment. He's there.

He's there when Tooru opens his eyes. He's the one who called the doctor when he saw Tooru seating on the bed when he came back from the restroom. He's outside the room as the doctor examines Tooru. He's the first one who know that Tooru became amnesiac after the accident.

But he's too afraid to face Tooru. To look at Tooru's eyes. To see those orbs look at him as if that's the first time he saw Koushi.

He's afraid

If it's not because of their bestfriends, if it's not because of iwaizumi and Daichi, Tooru wouldn't have to see his face in a while.

It still hurts. The look from his face as he said that his lover, his Koushi is a stranger, that he doesn't want to go with him hurts sugawara a lot.

Like every other night, Sugawara spent his night crying and falling asleep with a swelling eyes.




[unedited; votes and comments are highly appreciated]

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