Breaking Damnation (Alastor X Reader)

Chapter 19: The doomed one (End)

Turning back towards the hotel thoughts tried to fight off the agony, thinking instead of how it was all over and that soon you'd be allowed to return to a plush bed for rest. After so many nights of worry, so many days of training, and a long battle it would be bliss to be able to finally to rest without worry. Stone limbs kept trying to move forwards, each step slowly becoming harder than the last, the adrenaline that pulsed though veins was now slowly fading away. It was a sensation that you should have been familiar with however this time it felt different, far more draining, far more tiring, for more crushing. Vision grew more blurred and distorted with each moment that passed by. The weight of the underworld slowly dragged you down till eventually legs could not handle the weight any longer, they buckled and knees hit the dirt once more. The sudden and rapid movement made everything feel as though it was spinning and moving around you. Alastor turned around, looking down at you for only a moment before kneeling down in front of you "That exhausted already? I thought you had more stamina than that. Oh well, I guess I can't give you too much of a hassle. It was your first real scuffle after all!" he chimed. "And I imagine that blood loss isn't helping much" Without much effort arms hooked themselves around your back and under your legs, though you were far smaller than him he still picked you up as though you weighed nothing to him. "Now then, lets get back to the others. I'm sure Charlie is already in a panic trying to find everyone" Despite the comfort that came with being in his arms something felt wrong. You understood the pain since it was the worse wound dealt to your new body, you understood the lack of energy with how long and hard you had to fight, you understood the wooziness with the loss of blood. What you didn't understand was the strange sensation that lingered just below the pain. The wound felt as though it was burning, infecting the surrounding skin with an invisible fire. Though the skin was wet with blood there was a strange dry crackling, as though the remaining tissue had turned to glass and was cracking under its own weight. Trembling hands moved closer to the body, resting atop the stab wound and trying to ease the agony with a gentle pressure. "S-somethings wrong, it's... different" you softly said. "A stab wound through the stomach is naturally going to feel different than a stab wound through the eye. Far more nerves and muscle along the path and not enough shock to numb the pain" he replied "Not to mention the stomach acid eating away at the surrounding tissue" he finished with a laugh. "N-no it feels, like something is slowly cracking" you elaborated. He stopped in his tracks for a moment "What?" Blood froze to ice as you gazed up at him. That wider smile that he normally held slowly softening to what could only be described as a disappointed expression. A sense of dread emerged within thoughts as they recalled what weapon had hit you, a jet-black spear.

"I'm dying, aren't I..."

Though he didn't say a word the silence was more than enough to give the answer. A small sigh escaped him as he began to move once again. "That may be the case my dear, there were a few running about with holy weapons." The energy that was normally held in his voice was lessened with tiredness, leaving emptiness and fragments of static. "Don't go inside" you whispered "I don't want them to see this" you finished. He stopped in his tracks, remaining still for only a moment before kneeling down onto the ground. Dirt further ruining already tattered attire. Though he let go of your legs he still held you in his lap, arms thankfully not fully letting you go. "Don't get me wrong, they're good but, they'll scream and only prolong this hell trying to save me" you explained with a soft chuckle. "I'd rather spend my last moments with you... to say my goodbyes..." though held entirely still the earth still seemed to be moving beneath you, thoughts themselves starting to go into a swirl. "... and say how much I love you" Though true there was still pain that came with it, it was the first time openly saying such words and it would more than likely be the last. "Even if you didn't feel the same way... I still love you" With thoughts in a blur there was no longer a filter, no second guesses on what to say, no more worries of saying the wrong thing. "It hurts, it hurts badly but If I had to... i'd do it again. I know what you did in life but I couldn't let him... I couldn't let him do that to you." The end was approaching, there was no longer a reason not to let it all out until your last breath came. "I just wish... I could have done more" you muttered "I wanted... to see more..." "You did well my dear, not the cleanest performance but certainly a unique and entertaining one. I do wish there was more that I could do to return the favor but it seems that I won't be given the opportunity" he said. "It's a shame really. Such a perfect little devotee, lost to a spear. And due to a minion no less" he said. "Oh well, it is an inevitability. One that all of us will come to face at some point" he finished. "Perhaps... if were ever reborn... we-we'll meet each other again" you said quietly. Though you wanted to keep your gaze on him, vision kept blurring and dipping out leaving either blobs of color or just splotches of black. "I highly doubt it but who knows, stranger things have been happening as of late. If god allows it then perhaps our paths might cross once more" he said. "Ah I can see it now, the two of us would meet at one of those cafes. I'd be sitting there reading the paper and you'd walk by, pausing for a moment as you noticed me" Though he too seemed tired he kept going, attempting to hold some energy within his words. "Sensing familiarity you'd soon come over to chat and the two of us would waist the day away talking to one another, retelling stories of our lives and coming back the next day to do it all over again. It would be grand" though it was painful to do so a small chuckle managed to escape from you. Resting your head against his chest your body practically melted into his touch as he kept going "I don't know what shenanigans we'd engage in but I imagine I'd rope you into something and the two of us would somehow find a way to cause mayhem with the new technology of the world. Who knows, perhaps we'd even find some of the others along lifes journey before coming right back down here and doing it all over again" Though you fought to keep a small smile the tears could not help but slip past, turning already blurry vision into a wall of reds. Despite his best efforts to try and bring comfort you knew he didn't believe that it would happen. Fragile lies of hope were created haphazardly to try and allow misery to subside within your final moments. Though you knew the truth you were still thankful that he spent the time and effort into putting on one last performance for a dying soul. Though words could no longer be spoken lingering thoughts still silently whispered. "I'm sorry" thoughts muttered. Despite best efforts heavy eyelids were too much for an already drained body, darkness soon taking vision away leaving only the feeling of being in his arms. "I wanted... to see the end" thoughts whispered. Memories began to come forth, your old life slowly replaying itself once again within fading thoughts. Fragmented memories retold birthday parties, memories of your family, memories of school, memories of friends and the time you spent together, memories of the first time you watched the show. Soon they moved to your first death, the first time you laid on deaths door, the first time you felt that horrid cold creeping through the skin, the first time you were killed by another's doing, the first time that you didn't make it back home. Memories moved to the sparing matches, to the days working away and saving money, to all the times he had messed with you and caused you panic, to the night you had spent together, the words spoken to you, until finally memories caught up with the present. Despite nerves giving out and dying there was still a deep pain that echoed from beneath the spreading numbness. The lingering pain coming from the words that were left unspoken, both words that you were now unable to say and the long desired words of genuine affection that were never spoken to you. "I wish... I could... have stayed" you thought. The weight of the world seemed to try to snuff what little flame of life remained within. At long last the mind gave out, one last thought just barley managing to make one final death plea "Please god, take care... of them..." Once again that dark presence seemed to emerge, deaths cold fingers once again reaching forwards towards what little remained of the soul. Giving one final exhale there was no more fighting, no more hiding, no more resisting, no more struggling. All was allowed to finally fade to nothingness.

"Goodbye"

Authors notes: It wasn't very easy to do a story such as this while sticking relatively close to character but I believe I did well in creating a complicated tragedy. I ask you to read the tale once more, paying closer attention to the words spoken and the interactions. Once done please tell me, what hurts worse? Harsh words spoken aloud or words of affection that were never said to begin with? The truth of the answer will sting, even more so when the implications are realized and the elaborate lie comes undone.