5. only get better (moxiety)

34 2 0
                                    

Virgil picks at his skin. It's not something he's proud of, but it's not something he's been able to stop, either. What terrifies him most, though, is how Patton will respond when he discovers this carefully-guarded secret.

*

Pairing(s): Moxiety (Patton | Morality + Virgil | Anxiety)

Content Warning(s): making out, slightly sexual situations/implications (nothing explicit), partial nudity, skin-picking, dermatillomania, blood mention, injuries, panic/anxiety attack, swearing

*

They're kissing. How did they get here?

(His acceptance by the light sides. Becoming best friends with Patton, baking with Patton, watching movies with Patton, learning to knit with Patton, drawing with Patton, laughing with Patton, crying with Patton, crushing on Patton, pining over Patton, Patton Patton Patton , everything is Patton, Patton is...everything. A nd then, miracle of all miracles, Patton actually likes him back .

Kissing. They've kissed before, loads of times: over a snoring Remus' head as the sides form a dogpile and watch movies, in between folding clothes together, while p uttering around the kitchen making lunch, in passing as they do their respective jobs, over wine as they giggle and tipsily fool around a bit. So yeah, they've kissed lots, only never quite so intimate. Never quite so heated. Because Virgil...he can't let anyone in so far. He can't let anyone see .

He can't let anyone see the spots and scabs and scratches on his skin—not the battle scars of abuse, no, none of the other sides would ever do something like that to him—only for some reason he does it to himself.)

Virgil is moaning. When did he start moaning?

(Patton is so pretty . Just smiling with Patton would be enough. Just holding hands with him, just snuggling with him, just kissing him. More would be oh so nice, too, but...but then Patton would see , and he can't see.

But Virgil knows Patton isn't sex-averse, so of course he would want more too. And Patton would wait for Virgil to be ready, he would, he's kind and patient so of course he would wait past the end of the world, but is it really Virgil's right to make him wait? Especially when it's over something so ridiculously foolish.

He stands in front of the mirror in nothing but boxers. He stands and he stares at himself and his hands are itching and he blinks and they're picking off a scab on his left shoulder and goddammit, why can't he just stop ? Or, better—why can't he just get things over with and let Patton down like he knows he's going to? Best to do it quick, before either one falls even more in love than they already have.)

Patton is taking off Virgil's shirt. Why—

Patton is taking off Virgil's shirt.

Fuck. He can't do this. He can't he can't hecanthecanthecanthe

Virgil's breath quickens even as Patton's ministrations on his skin slow, his widened eyes taking in Virgil's skin. Virgil's marred skin. Virgil's ruined skin. Virgil's shame.

Then Patton is backing up and off the bed, an odd look in his eyes, and Virgil is scrambling backwards, desperately falling hard to the floor and crawling into the furthest corner of the room. He's shaking shaking shaking and so is his breath and in fact he's not sure if he's even breathing at all anymore and god Patton's gonna hate him so much , that look in his eyes has to be disgust, he must be so disturbed by Virgil and how ugly he is both outside and in.

Sanders Sides One-Shots!!Where stories live. Discover now