Dear God
I say this with a tearful heart.
Father I am bitterly lost in the dark cloud of anxiety.
My heart is heavy.
I'm scared of this life.
Nothing in it seems to be right.
Father I have so much questions.
I don't have peace,
Is it not for me?
Why do things we love don't seem to find us?
And why do I love things I wish I could forget?
Why does life seem to be more of a fight?
Dear God if my life is a fight I need a light.
For I am in dark.
If really life is a journey,
Then why do I seem to lose my way just the moment I would be saying I got it?
Father where I'm I going?
And who is with me?
Dear God I am dangerously scared.
Why all this?
What's all that?
How did this happen?
Why me?
Life is always flooding my mind with so much of these questions.
Father I'm lost and scared.
Life is a race, I clearly heard her saying it.
God whenever I fall I'm threatened to lose
Father can we all win?
Who doesn't want to be a champion?
Dear God I am always trying
But I end up crying.
I pray but I can't find the right words to say.
I am angry with this life
I am ashamed of my ignorance
But I'm not too scared or even ashamed to call your name.
I am tired of my sinful deeds
They give me sleepless nights
I am a sinner not because I want to be one
But my life always drags me into it's sinful ways
Then father am I still your child?
Maybe yes, but a lost one.
Then father will I ever be found?
Life is not fair
Father ain't I being ungrateful?
Dear God
I'm breathing for the reasons you only know.
I am fighting for something known by you
I am in a race, the results you already have.
I'm on a journey to somewhere known only by you.
But father
My pains and troubles are silently killing me.
My sinful life is eating up all my hope.
And my faith is messed.
Father what then shall I be?
© Yeukai Beverley Faera.
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PLEASE note that the pic I used as a cover page is from google.
