Fallout [The 100]

62

★ M A I A ★

When we returned from dinner, Clarke went immediately upstairs to change. I went to the bar. Delilah was gone, so I grabbed the bottle in front of Murphy and took several long gulps. "That bad, huh?"

"Jordan told them everything," I told him, sitting the bottle back on the bar. "It was a losing battle from the moment we walked through that door. Russell was never going to let us stay."

Murphy looked at the bottle for a long time before taking another drink. "I guess we all have to go out somehow."

"Abby told me that you almost died."

"No," Murphy said sharply. "I did die. And I saw...something."

"When I was a little girl, my grandmother told me there was no such thing as an afterlife," I said quietly. "She said even if there was, we shouldn't waste time thinking about it. While we were living, we should focus on living, on being happy and making life more beautiful. On being in harmony with the world around us. If we did that then we'd live on in the memories of the ones we'd left behind and our spirts would return to the stars."

Murphy took another sip. "The stars, huh?"

"I think it was supposed to be nature, trees or whatever. But when you live in a floating tin can, you adapt." I shrugged. "But take that with a grain of salt. She also said if you lived your life focused on the negatives, you'd haunt the world forever as a ravenous ghost."

He snorted. "By that measurement, we're all screwed."

"I don't know, maybe not." I took a small sip. "Sure, everything around us perpetually sucks ass. But we've never given up. I mean, would we be here if we had? Everything we've done, we've done in the hopes of making a better life, of being happy. That's harmonious in my book."

Murphy looked at me for a moment. "You've thought about this a lot." I shrugged. On the Ring there hadn't been a lot to think about. I kept coming back to where are they now. "You never told me any of that."

"You never asked."

"If I had died, you would've remembered me?"

I rolled my eyes. "Have you ever known me to forget?" He laughed and after a moment I joined in. Maybe it was the alcohol, or just reliving the memories of my family, but I felt lighter. "Of course, I would've remembered you. And besides, you're Jordan's favorite. He's gonna be telling those stories to his grandkids."

"Then I guess we're all immortal."

I held up the bottle. "Damn right, we are."

★★★★

I lost track of time, and how much I'd had to drink. By the time Clarke returned with news and a bloody hand, I was well and thoroughly wasted. She filled us in about the Primes, how they revered nightbloods as much as the earthborn had. Delilah had almost been kidnapped, but Clarke had saved her and exposed herself as a nightblood.

I leaned toward Murphy and whispered. "Did you notice her leave?" He shook his head. I covered my mouth to stop myself from giggling. Before Clarke could catch on, the door opened and Madi came inside. Behind her followed Bellamy, Echo, Raven, and Alex.

I jumped out of my seat and ran over to Bellamy, throwing my arms around his neck. "I missed you."

Bellamy kissed me and then laughed. "How much have you had to drink?"

I scrunched my mouth to the side. "Plenty."

He shook his head, and his eyes drifted down to what I was wearing. Unlike Clarke, who'd gone immediately for her old clothes, I'd forgotten to change. "Wow, you look..."