Lumanti (Memory)

Hello Again

The heart and its impulse. A logic never stands a chance against what one's heart wants. Every logical cell in her brain was telling her that meeting him was a bad idea but every beat of her heart was forcing her to meet him. She reasoned maybe this time they can give each other a proper goodbye, a proper closure that couldn't be given in past. But how can she evn begin to give a goodbye to a person with whom she doesn't even remember saying hello to, her logic argued. Some part of her didn't want to say goodbye at all as if she was falling for this person without even realising.

She was now in front of mirror getting ready to meet him. She was wearing her plain white blouse paired with her denim shorts and trying to mend her hair while remembering her last conversation with him.

"Are you seeing anyone now?" she inquired. She wanted to know before she decided to meet him.

"No not at all. I did go on a date once, but it was a mistake. It didn't mean anything if I look back at it." He said trying to be honest.

"No that's alright, we were not together," she replied not knowing what to feel about it.

"You are the best thing that ever happened to me and I hope it was not a breakup. We just haven't got a chance to talk about it properly. That day, my birthday that you planned was going so well. I was so happy and felt so lucky to have you in my life but came that dreaded conversation which turned my best day to worst one in matter of seconds. T please meet me once. I want to see you." He said with desparation in his voice.

"You are looking at me."

"No, I want to see you in real not through this virtual shit. Please."

"I don't know if it is a good idea."

"I know you must be worried that I am not right person to see right now as your mind has blocked me off but please give me a chance." There was sincerity in his voice that she couldn't ignore. For some reason, she blurted, "I live in Nowra, now."

"Can I come and see you?", he asked in excitement.

"Isn't it too far from where you are?" she asked.

"It is just an hr and half drive."

They decided to meet at Farmer's market next day at 1 in afternoon.

She didn't realise that she was smiling while reminiscing this conversation over and over in her head. She unknowingly touched the small scar on her forehead that made its place when she hit her head in the table. It was getting smaller but still was prominent. She was nervous about meeting him and now doubting if she should meet him at all. If it was even a good idea. 

After giving up on her unruly hair she got up, grabbed her purse and slipped her feet into sneakers, took car key from bowl and went downstairs. She got into her car and drove towards farmer's market. It was a warm day of winter and there were only few people in market as it was middle of the week.

They reached around same time. He was getting off from his car and about to text her when she took a turn into the parking area. She saw him standing outside his black car wearing plain white t-shirt and blue Bermuda shorts, opposite side to where she parked her car.  His beautiful eyes were hidden behind his square sunglasses. His smile widened as she started moving towards him, waving her hands. He was simply happy to see her after what felt like eternity and waved back at her.

As she came in front of him, he almost moved forward to hug her but stopped when she just stood there maintaining a bit of distance. She smiled at him forming a cute dimple at her right cheek. He remembered how he used to poke at her dimple teasing her and telling her how beautiful her smile is.