ᴛʜʀᴏᴜɢʜ ᴛʜᴇ ɢʟᴀss ᴡɪɴᴅᴏᴡ ☑

Longing

Two months later

"You are up early." Eunwoo, one of Jungkook's many roommates, asked.

The 20-year-old laughed a little and went back to cooking without wanting to say anything. He liked being silent and the people who lived with him had gotten used to his friendly silence. Today was one of those mornings when he felt that nothing could bring him down. The weather has changed. The wind was soothing to the skin rather than icy. Although it was still a bit cold, it was beatable with long sleeves.

Jungkook poured the coffee into his mug and put the toast on the side before walking into a common living room equipped with three big and comfortable sofas, all facing the TV.

Two months ago, he didn't think he would hit rock bottom more than he had, but then he did when Jimin confessed to him and then told him what would infuriate anyone.

He had moved out without telling the man and he hadn't heard from Jimin ever since either. It disappointed him to think that Jimin didn't even text him more than he'd like to admit, but he knew the reason why it didn't happen.

He had to take up Sana's offer on the housing situation. Leaving Jimin's place, he didn't have any other option but to move into Sana's place for a week. It was in the same community, Park97. The building was quite the enormous infrastructure in itself with multiple entries and exits, so he was careful to not cross paths with Jimin.

On his last day of internship, Mrs. Sago had come up to him, offering him a full-time job. He didn't know what to feel then. He was certainly happy, but taking the job meant a change of everything.

He had to tell his parents the news. They were surely disheartened that he wasn't going back home, but at the same time, they were proud of him and encouraged him to take the job offer.

Then the next hurdle was the lack of accommodation. Sana surely would've extended her help, but he didn't want to. Staying in the same building as Jimin for ten days was temporary, but making it permanent for the near future had stones lodging in his gut.

It was then he had decided that he'd live as a paying guest in shared accommodation.

Then as though his lucky stars were beginning to shine a little brighter. One of the apps he was working on as a side hustle was bought by a local business and he got some money, which he used for moving and settling into the new place until he got his first paycheck.

The next good thing was finding a gem of the place near his office. There weren't many cheap places around the posh area, but the owner of his current residence was a lonely man without a family, and he offered youngsters the place to share at an economic price.

Finishing breakfast, Jungkook washed his dishes and grabbed his office bag from the couch to walk to his office. It took him twenty minutes every day, and he enjoyed every second of it.

Today, the sun was warm, yet the wind was exuding more power as it whisked his hair from his forehead. Listening to songs through his earphones, he continued walking.

As he was crossing a park, he cocked his head to find the same kids who played football every day. His attention was pulled away when his phone rang and he recognized Jin's number on it. He was early today, so he decided to stop and sit on the park bench to take the call.

"Hello," he said after pressing the green icon and pulling his earphones closer to his mouth.

"Hi, Jungkook. How have you been?"

Jungkook smiled, picturing back to the last two months and feeling good about himself for the first time in almost a year. "Couldn't have been better, Hyung," he didn't say snidely. "How about you?"

"Um, finished my ph.D. At last."

"Well, congratulations. I am happy for you."

Then there was silence. For Jungkook it was peaceful and calm. His mind wasn't running scenarios in his head or showing him the flashback of all those bitter moments. He closed his eyes with a smile and let the air be one with his skin. He knew then. He knew that he had successfully mended his heart.

"Jungkook," the 20-year-old opened his eyes then. "I am sorry about whatever happened."

"I forgive you, Hyung. We weren't meant to be."

Hearing that, Jin felt something squeeze in his heart. "I miss you, Jungkook. Can we please give ourselves one more chance? I promise I will do things differently this time."

"I am sorry, Hyung. No."

"Last one, Jungkook."

"I begged for most basic things while in a relationship... Like some peace of mind. I am never allowing you or anyone else to put me in a similar situation again." Jungkook blamed for the first time, the bitterness of his words was abundant, yet justified.

"Jungkook, think about it."

"I've thought and thought for all those weeks, Hyung. I am finally happy and I don't need anyone else. I am sorry. I hope you find someone suitable someday too."

With a soothing sigh, he disconnected the call and stared at the kids in front of him. One boy was kicking the football toward the little girl for her to score the goal, and the other boys were yelling at him for that. He smiled at that and thought about Jimin.

"I can't tell you that I love you and not tell you what I have done."

Thinking about him was always a game. He ended up hating the man, and sometimes, he ended up worshipping him. Jimin was the anchor who didn't let him sink. He could never pay him back for the confidence he had taught him. He didn't have enough time to battle his two-faced feelings right now, so he got up to resume his walk to work.

**

Jimin's head was low and his grown hair was covering his higher cheekbone. Taehyung patted him and made him sit straight. They were in a bar, celebrating their job promotion. Everyone was with someone, including Taehyung. Jimin felt the need to go back home.

Taehyung was celebrating, and Jimin was tolerating. "Come on! Don't be like this today."

"I just miss him."

Taehyung's eyes widened at the confession. Jimin all but avoided talking about Jungkook for all these weeks. He had told him about what happened, but he didn't allow Taehyung to speak about it ever after. "I know we are not supposed to talk about you-know-who, but I can't help and notice that he never said he didn't like you. All he ever said was he couldn't. There's a chance that he might return your calls one of these days. He hadn't blocked you yet, so that's a good sign, right?"

Jimin didn't tell Taehyung that he wasn't even trying to get Jungkook back. He only let his best friend believe that he was on it.

How could he? The panic attack two months ago had him hospitalized. The gravity of the allegation was much more than what he had anticipated. When he felt guilt before, he felt sheer disgust for himself whenever he went to bed alone every night. "Fine," he convinced himself that he needed to put on a show for his friend's happiness. Snatching the drink from Taehyung's hand, he downed it.

The moment he separated the tumbler from his lips, he felt the burn all over his body. It wasn't because of the drink, but because of the boy who had just walked in. Jungkook. Their eyes met for a moment and everything blocked away.

Before Taehyung could discern what happened, Jimin walked out of the bar.

Jungkook was with his colleagues and carried on with the group, especially when they were here to celebrate his achievement. He settled on a couch for eight people.

Taehyung held his date's hand to bring her to a separate table. "What just happened?" Sana asked.

"I'll be right back. Please order anything you want." He kissed her head and beelined towards Jungkook's table.