the hangover pt II-phil wenneck

three

You all confusedly look between each other and Chow after his head cracks the table, not really sure as of what the fuck just happened.

"Chow," Phil says, patting his back.

"Mr. Chow, are you okay?" Alan asks.

"Is he—is he dead?" you ask, peeking over at his face. "How fucking convenient. Right as he was about to tell us what the fuck happened last night."

"You've gotta be kidding me," Phil says, checking for a pulse on Chow's neck.

"Fuck, he's dead," Phil says after a short moment of silence, standing up and tugging his fingers through his hair, Stu continuously screams as he stands up and back away, staring at Chow's, dead, body. 

"Fuck me," you mumble under your breath, rubbing your eyes with the heels of your palms.

"Help! Help!" Stu yells towards the front door.

"Stu," Phil sighs, trying to calm down your panicking friend.

"Stu, shut up. Shut up!" Phil says, and it's obvious he's starting to panic a bit himself.

"Stu, calm the fuck down," you say, glancing over at Alan's straight face as he does some kind of high pitched scream with his mouth closed.

"Call and ambulance!" Stu yells.

"Do any of us even know the emergency number for this place?" you ask.

"Stu, shut up! He's dead! Look, if someone comes and finds a dead body and a pile of cocaine, we're gonna spend the rest of our lives in a fucking Thai prison! Shh!" Phil says, Stu nodding along as he shushes as well.

"Oh my God, can you at least cry like a normal person?" you ask Alan.

"Alan, please stop crying," Phil says, Alan sniffling.

"All right, all right! I just need a second to figure this out," Phil says, sitting back down on a chair. Stu also slowly stumbled onto the ground, curling up in a ball.

"What about the ice machine? Stops the smell and gets him out of our room?" you ask, everyone slowly looking up at you.

-

"This is disgusting, why did I get butt duty?" you whisper as the four of you carry Chow's dead body towards the stairs, your hands being the ones supporting his butt. Well, Alan isn't really helping at all. More like just walking alongside you guys. Says he's 'on lookout'.

"This is the worst idea ever," Stu mumbles.

"Well I didn't see you coming up with anything better. Seemed to me that you were too busy crying in a ball on the floor."

"What the fuck is this place?" Phil asks.

"Bangkok is the capital of Thailand. It's population is 12 million people," Alan says, reading off of the cards he had from the rehearsal last night.

"Alan, put the cards away and help!" Stu says. Alan stuffs the cards in his pocket, putting his hand under yours. You look up at him with raised eyebrows, Alan smirking softly.

"Dude, don't be weird. Put your hand somewhere else," you say, Alan growing before moving his hand under the legs instead.

"Elevator," Stu says as you approach it down the hall.

"I'll get the button!" Alan says, letting go to press the elevator button.

"We had to bring the monkey, Alan?" you mumble, listening to it squeak as it watches you three struggle.

"What the fuck is the deal with this monkey?" Phil asks as it jumps onto the body, then onto Phil's shoulder.

"That monkey gets it," Alan chuckles.