Fireflies↳Bucky Barnes

7- The moment my world came crashing down

      As I step into my Aunt and Uncle's apartment I see them sitting down at the table, completely silent. I see the look in their eyes and I sigh. "What's he done now?" Ben shakes his head and stands. "He ran off again." I let out a breath of disappointment, then turned to leave the apartment. "Peyton wait," I stop and turn to face my family. May an dBen share a look, then Ben sighs. "We think... Maybe we have been too hard on Peter. Too restricting, and that's why he's acting out."

      I stare at them for a moment, then sigh and close the door walking up to them. "That's not it." I tell them. I sit down at the table and shake my head. "You guys are excellent parents. And you are in no way restricting." They both look down and don't speak. I grab May's hand and she looks at me. "I want you to name one way you think you are being too hard on him." May opens her mouth to answer, then she turns to Ben and he shakes his head.

      I smile at both of them. "See? That isn't it." My smile falters. "I don't know what's going on with Peter, but when he tells me," I stop myself from saying 'if'. "I'll help him through whatever it is, and I know you both will too." Ben and May smile at me, then ben gives me a pointed look. "How are you doing Peyton? I know this time of year is hard for you." My shoulders drop, along with my smile.

      "I'm fine Ben. I've gotten past that." May and Ben share a look and I look down. Around this time 10 years ago, my parents died. Or rather, I killed them. May and Ben don't know the truth of how they really died and I intend on keeping it that way. All they know is that their death struck me hard. For weeks after the funeral I remained silent, but when Peter started having a hard time at school and had trouble sleeping, I dropped my pity party to help him through it.

      Around this time May signed me up for therapy. She thought I wasn't coping and that me looking after Peter was how I dodged the grief. Little did she know that each night I would lay awake and think about how it was all my fault. I eventually learned to get past that, and forgive myself.

      "...If you say so." May says quietly. I avoid their eyes, knowing that the sadness and pity in them will make me cry. And I can't cry. Not when Peter is out there doing who knows what. "If he's not home in the next thirty minutes, I'm calling the police." May grabs her phone off the counter, then sits back down.

      Just then, the door swings open and Peter runs inside, hood up and head down. The three of us share a look as Peter's door slams shut. I sigh, then stand up making my way over to his room. I knock on the door as I hear rustling. "Peter? Can I come in?" Unlike my brother, I know to knock before entering someone's room. "Uh, NO! Just- Ugh! I'm changing!" My eyebrows crease in confusion as I hear grunting.

      "Okay!" I pull his door open to find him lying on his bed in sweatpants and a T-shirt, homework layed out in front of him. I stare at his face and the bruise that now resides on his forehead. The one from this morning is now completely gone. Peter noticed me staring at it, then grabs a hoodie and pulls it on, yanking on the strings so his face is hidden in the hood. I snort and sit down on his bed. "Smooth." I use my finger to widen the gap in his hoodie. He averts his eyes from me and I frown.

      "Peter-" I start, but he cuts me off. "It's nothing." He turns away from me. My mouth gapes slightly. "Peter," I try again, trying to turn him around, but he stays facing away from me. "You know you can tell me anything." Peter's head lowers more and I frown. "I'm your sister. You can trust me-" Peter whips around. "I said it's nothing!" I blink in surprise. Peter never yells, let alone at me.

      "I'm sorry, but I don't believe that." I say firmly. Peter looks at the ground and I use my hand to tilt his head to look at me. "Peter, I know better than anyone. I know when you are lying to me, just like I know that this," I point at his bruise. "Is not nothing." He pulls his face out of my touch. I stare at him for a moment. "I know you want to tell me." I tilt my head down into his view. "I can see it in your eyes." He closes his eyes, then turns his head away.

      "Peter I-" I reach for his shoulder, but he swats my hand away. He looks at me, face bright red with anger and tears in his eyes. "Just stop Peyton! I don't want your help!" I jerk back in surprise. I shake my head, then try to reach for him again, but once again he swats my hand away. "I said stop! I don't want anything from you, okay! Just leave me alone!" My heart drops in my chest. My hand reaches up to my lip as it begins to quiver.

      "Peter, please just talk to me." He jumps to his feet. "No! Okay! You don't own me! I don't have to tell you anything!" I clench my teeth and shake my head, rising to my feet. "I know I don't own you. No one does, but that doesn't mean you can go around at night doing, god knows what!" Peter's chest heaves. "You are getting hurt Peter! Do you get that? I don't want you to get hurt! I love you." Peter looks away from me. "Well, maybe... Maybe I don't love you."

      I feel my heart shatter in my chest. My eyes go wide and tears blur my vision. I shake my head. "Peter you don't mean that." He whips around. "Yes I do! Just get out! I don't want you here!" I take a step back and Peter seems to realize what he's just said. I look at him with tears in my eyes, then I nod. "Okay." I nod and wipe at my eyes. "Okay, I'll leave." I walk to his door and pull it open. "Just know I'll be here when you are ready to talk."

      I close his door and briskly walk to the door. "Peyton!" I hear my Aunt and Uncle call out. I ignored them and ran out of the apartment building to my car. Once I'm sitting down the tears come. I sob heavily with my head against the steering wheel. I never thought it was possible for someone you love to hurt you that much. Peter... He means the world to me, and I- I guess he doesn't feel the same way.

      I start my car and pull away from the curb, tears blurring my vision. I'm not going home. There's somewhere I need to be.

- author's notes -

I'm not gonna lie... I'm crying right now. This chapter... it took a lot out of me.

me sobbing my eyes out aside, the time line for this and 'Spirits in my Head' finally match up. This is right after Peter saved Corinna at the drug store

I just need to get the other stories caught up now. 'Lycanthropy' is like one or two chapters away (Technically there is just a one day gap between the current events of 'Spirits in my head' and itself, but I've got alot to write for that one day)

Believe it or not, A X L is just one day behind the current events.

and with that, I am off. I've got some Amung Us to play while I continues to cry over this chapter.