Starlight

Chapter 3

Kaya stares out at the ocean, trying to force herself to see everything the same way as that night. Her hair tangles itself around her face, and she chews and licks at her lips nervously. She watched the sun set, she's told herself countless times that it's over and yet here she still stands. Things haven't gone as she expected, and now she finds herself alone on the boardwalk at night.

Footsteps on the wooden planks cause her to suck in a breath as she spins to face her company.

"You shouldn't be out here alone," he says, watching her carefully before taking  a couple of slow steps toward her.

His steps are evenly matched as she backs away. "I'm fine."

He sighs. "Kaya." Will's voice sounds drained and tired.

Kaya shakes her head, looking at the ground. Her name sounds wrong coming from his lips. It's like taboo - a word he never should have spoken. A name he never should have known.

"We need to talk about this," Will urges, taking advantage of her averted eyes to stand beside her. He leans on the railing, looking out at the sea. When Kaya doesn't respond, Will says, "This place hasn't changed a bit."

For some reason, Kaya finds this statement amusing, and she lets out a shaky laugh. "I guess not," she agrees. A moment of silence passes. "Have you been here since then?" She swallows hard.

Will watches her face carefully before answering. "No. Have you?"

Kaya shakes her head 'no'. "I couldn't bring myself to come back. Until tonight."

"Why tonight?" Will asks, squinting as he tries to make out the shadow of a boat somewhere out at sea.

Kaya turns to face Will for the first time. Her blue eyes lock with his brown orbs for a moment before she can find the right words to say. "Let's go for a walk." Kaya begins to walk with Will falling into step beside her. Together they follow the same path they walked together just once before.

Passing the small restaurant in silence, they continue on until they find the rock steps. They descend, and both of them are surprised to see the same log lying perfectly in the sand. As they both sit, they can feel the obvious difference - it's cold and uncomfortable when sitting alone, their skin not in contact with each other in some way.

Kaya looks out to the surf, and in her mind she plays back visions of herself and Will dancing in the waves. She can't help but smile. "I came tonight to let go." She turns to find that Will doesn't look surprised. Kaya shakes her head. "I've held onto it for too long, thinking it was magic, or something like that.

"But seeing you." She stops and sighs. "Made me realise it wasn't. It was just a night on the beach. We were just two stupid kids who were lonely and created their own fun. It didn't mean anything."

"You're wrong," Will says quickly. "It meant something. Well at least it did to me. That night I-" He cuts himself short, choking on his words. "I wasn't stood up. I'd just gotten back from a funeral. Someone really special to me. I was so angry at everyone, at the world, at myself. I don't know what I was thinking." Will shakes his head. "But I saw you, and I wasn't angry at you. And that night with you, it made me believe in everything good again."

Neither one talks now, they both let the words sink in. Kaya hadn't expected anything like that to come from Will.

Finally Kaya says what she needs to. "I was supposed to be going to the formal with my boyfriend." The excuse sounds petty and selfish next to Will's. "But he called me fifteen minutes before he was supposed to pick me up to tell me we were over." Kaya shrugs. It isn't the pain of being dumped by her boyfriend that hurts. "That night with you made me think that romance was still alive. But the more time we spend together, the more I'll see that nothing's perfect, and nothing lasts."

"That's a pretty depressing view to have about the world," Will points out. "Of course nothing is perfect, but it doesn't mean it isn't worthwhile."

"You're saying if you got to know me, you wouldn't feel let down after that night?"

Will swallows hard, unable to say the things he really wants to say. "If I compared everything to that night I'd always be let down." He stares intently into Kaya's eyes, and just as she leans in a millimetre, he adds, "But as much as that night meant to me, I've found happiness in other things. I love my girlfriend, and she isn't perfect, but she's mine."

Kaya pulls back, finding it hard to breathe. For some reason she hadn't expected that - for Will to have a girlfriend. But he does, and now she feels stupid, because maybe, just maybe she was letting herself fall for the real him in the short amount of time since they officially met.

"Well, good for you," Kaya says with a frown.

"You right?" Will asks, standing as Kaya does.

"Yeah," she says a little too quickly. "Just glad this was all sorted out. It makes a lot more sense now." There's some truth to her statement, because things do make a little more sense to her now. It's clear to Kaya that she is hopelessly in love with Will, because somehow he's exceeded her make believe thoughts of him. But it doesn't matter, because he clearly can't feel the same way.

"I can't believe this is our last week!" Julian cries, mirroring Kaya's stance.

"Shhhh child. Just dance!" Kaya instructs with a grin.

Julian starts doing a little tap dance, and Kaya laughs at him. He's childish and fun, but completely mature at the same time. In the past two months they've become good friends, and she's going to be sad to see him go.

During the two months she's been able to hide her feelings and pretend to play normal with Will. The group goes out together a fair bit, and on one occasion Kaya got to meet Will's girlfriend, Ellise. Ellise clearly had no idea who Kaya was, and the situation was a little tense for everyone but her, as they all knew the truth.

But what's past is past, and now the only thing on Kaya's mind is trying to get the boys to perfect the loose choreography for their performance of 'Brokenhearted'.

"Alright, be serious now!" Kaya grabs Julian's chin and forces him to look at her. "If you don't get this right, I'll lose my job!"

"You're coming to the after party tomorrow night, right?" Julian asks Kaya once they're done.

"You inviting me?" Kaya asks playfully.

"I don't know if we're allowed to bring dates," Julian muses.

Kaya laughs at his adorable face. "I'm going, it's ok." It's not like that between them, they're just friends, and besides that he's three years her junior.

The final day of rehearsals finishes, and there's nothing more Kaya can do to help the boys. It's all up to the public votes and their performances. Kaya's only needed now for Jason's 'Lonely Boy' performance. The night ends, and it's one of the saddest yet exciting nights for everyone. The X Factor journey is almost over, and friendships that have been formed will more than likely fall apart.

Kaya watches the big screens in the green room as Samantha Jade is crowned the winner of X Factor 2012. While she's upset The Collective (her favourites) didn't win, Sammi is beautiful and talented, deserving of the title. But still, she was hoping it would have been The Collective.

"Picture!" Julian screams, practically jumping on Kaya. He holds his phone out as he gets in close with her. The boy really is the Selfie King. Over the past few weeks, she's been in numerous photos with the teen. "Oi group picture!" he yells now, motioning for the rest of The Collective to join him. "With our favourite dancer! But shhh, don't tell anyone!"

Bella takes the photo and Kaya has to force the smile onto her face as Will wraps his arm around her waist. Only this night to last through and she'll never have to see the man who causes her so many sleepless nights again.

The after party is fun, and everyone has a good time. It's a late night, and Kaya is grateful when she gets to go home to her bed. The thought, 'No more Will' passes through her head over and over again as she slips into her pyjamas and settles in for the night.

Lying there, cold, alone and in the dark, she curls up on her side and cries. "No more Will."