Hell Flower

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Howling and roaring erupted from the floor. Bright lights blinded me as I squinted out at the crowd. They surged towards the stage, crushing each other like a pack of animals in a stampede.

"Thank you all for coming out tonight!" I yelled into the microphone, panting as I caught my breath.

Sweat coated my back and dripped down my forehead. A familiar dizzying tingle pulsed through my temples, striking in time with the pounding of the drums.

Please, not again. Not right now.

"You've been a fantastic audience!"

I paced across the stage, holding my hand up to block the burning lights. They exploded like starbursts surrounded by glowing halos, blurring in my double vision. Light reflected off my silver sequined top like I was a damn disco ball. What was I thinking when I threw this outfit on?

Derek caught my eye as I passed him. His guitar was slung around his neck, and a bead of sweat dripped from his chin. He gave his head a weird little shake like a puppy dog, flicking the sweat out his dark hair.

"Are you all right?" He mouthed the words.

My heart took a leap towards my throat, and I bit down on my tongue. I did not want him worrying about me. This was not his problem. I could handle it myself. After forcing a half grin, I nodded and turned my attention back to the crowd.

Push through, Allison. You've got this. Almost there.

We'd worked so hard to get here. After so many late nights practicing and playing for near-empty venues as the opening act, fans were finally cheering for us, too. They weren't just waiting for us to get off the stage so the headliner would come on. Tonight, half the audience had screamed out the chorus of our last song with me. Hearing that made me feel like I was on fire. They knew all the lyrics.

I wasn't going to mess up everything we'd worked for by doing something stupid like freaking out on stage.

"I hope you all are excited for Make Them Scream!" I ran my shaky hand through my long, straight hair as I gazed out at the audience. I couldn't make out any faces, just a swirling, shouting mass of people. A pang of a headache flared through my temples like a jolt of lightning.

I need to get out of here.

"We're Hell Flower, and it's been amazing playing for you!" I screamed into the microphone.

Derek strummed out a distorted chord that reverberated through the theater, and Sam slammed on the drums, shaking the stage beneath my feet.

"Goodnight!" I threw my fist into the air, and then without giving the audience or my band a second glance, I jetted off the stage.

Fire burned in my veins. My skin tingled like I was coated in ice. I scratched at my arms, trying to make the itching stop. Hot, humid air churned in my lungs with each deep gasp. The oppressive scents of vomit, sweat and stale beer suffocated me as my senses amplified. My feet pounding against the polished concrete floor in the back hall.

I need air.

"Allison!" a voice called as I jogged toward the exit. "Allison! Stop!"

"I'm fine!" I snapped without looking back.

A hand grabbed me by the arm, and I yelped. Derek spun me around to face him. His dark eyes were bloodshot but concerned, and his shaggy brown hair was a frizzy mess on top of his head.

"Allison, what's going on?" he begged. "Talk to me, please."

My legs shook beneath me. His grip on me was light—comforting—but I didn't need him to take care of me. I didn't want him to see me like this. Not again.