Mercy - Antisepticeye x Reader (Revenge, continued)

I. Forgiveness

Are you thinking about me? Are you thinking about me? Are you? 

The words echoed bittersweetly in my head as my eyes went over it for the hundredth time. That was it. There was no clue as to how to find Anti. No coordinates, no riddles, nothing to latch onto in the overwhelming wave of expectant hopefulness to make things right. Is this how it ends? In six words, simple enough to break my heart by offering equally no solace at all and an abundance of it? 

"J-Jack?" I mumbled quietly, as I wasn't sure whether he was still asleep on the sofa. I took the phone into my hand, placing the other with the cut palm onto my heart in a useless attempt to calm it down. Staring at the screen, I made my way back into the living room. 

"Jack? I got a text -" I whispered, leaning over the sofa, only to not find Jack lying there anymore. I turned around and squinted my eyes into the darkness illuminated softly by some of the candles still burning. I slid the phone into my pocket and flipped the lightswitch. There was no sign of him. 

"Where did you go?" I urged and felt my voice shaking slightly. Where could he have gone? In my tiny apartment? 

I could feel myself silencing my breath as there was no answer. I called out for him again, but instead of his voice back, there was a faint distant melody coming from somewhere in the apartment. As I followed it cautiously, warily shifting my feet across the floor, cursing every creak my steps lured out of it, I mindlessly picked up a knife on the kitchen countertop. Only as I laid my good hand on my bedroom door and was slowly pushing it open did I realize, grasping the knife in the bandaged hand, that I have not placed the knife there. But before the perplexity of that could overbear me, my gaze stopped where the music was coming from. 

It was the same song as before, the one Anti played in my parent's house. Wishing it could be a message from him, I rushed towards the corner of my room. As I stood there, in front of my giant golden mirror, I realized that the music wasn't coming from anywhere around it, but rather from it. Confused, I tilted my head to the side and watched my reflection do the same. I could swear the music got a bit louder, and as I was distracted by that, my reflection moved. I jerked myself back, but then leaned in with blind curiosity. I slowly moved my head from one side to the other, watching the other me's eyes. They were unchanged. Obviously! The nightmare is over and I am imagining things. 

My eyes slid down her cheeks, onto the lips, where I felt I catched a brief smile, but dismissed it immediately as I noticed her cut throat, a few drops of blood streaming down her neck. I gasped as her hand shot out of the mirror and caught mine, plunging me into the mirror. 

A scream escaped my lips and I blinked fearfully, once again finding myself in complete darkness.

"Anti?" I said finally. A laughter came back, and before I realized it was Anti's, it was gone. The hand grabbed me again and as I opened my eyes again, I found myself on an empty road in the middle of my town. A sense of rage filled my mind. This was how I felt when I went to see Derek. I was sure of it. 

"What's up, darling?" I heard a chuckle behind me and turned around, startled by familiar unfamiliarity of the moment. I've been here before. "What's the problem, huh? You're here all alone?" the man smirked and I watched as his gaze slowly made its way down my body. A felt a shiver, I recognized him, I recognized this moment, I've been here before, I've lived this before, outside the supermarket, in the parking lot, before Anti - that's it! He was supposed to come save me now! 

The man started walking towards me. I took a step back, my eyes combing through the forest which surrounded the road. Will he come? 

"No, you silly, silly girl!" a voice rumbled, and I recognized it. It was mine. Startled, I inhaled sharply, turned around and ran. Away from the man, away from this memory. 

Out of the shadows and into the light of a streetlamp shifted a figure. I caught a glimpse of a knife stuck in his eye. Josh. Terror-stricken, I quickly turned towards the woods and ran off the road. 

As I was passing the trees, it started to feel as if I wasn't even running, as if I was in a dream. The moonlight which shone through the branches and flashed across my face turned more and more vivid, each time illuminating a flicker of a memory. Derek. Josh. Mia. Anti. Dark. 

"Do something!" I heard Anti's ridicule, "coward!" 

I stopped and covered my ears, bursting into tears. "I'm not... I'm not a coward! I'm not!" I whimpered. 

"Revenge!" Anti's voice rumbled again, repeating the word again and again until the voice merged into Dark's. "R e v e n g e!", he implored. 

I felt the cold hand again, as it grabbed my wrist and softly pulled it away from my ear. Through my tears, I saw myself. The me I encountered back then on the pier. Her lips curled into a gentle smile. 

"Mercy," she whispered, "you need to forgive yourself." 

I took a slow breath, shaken, but strangely comforted by my reflection. Her hand let go of me and swiftly pushed me back, making me slip off my feet and onto the moss. 

Feeling stuck, I waved my arms around and finally managed to get myself from under a blanket, I jumped out of my bed. I was back in my room, the song was gone. I got up and gave a cautious look to the stuffed bear sitting in my armchair facing the bed. But as I heard clatter from the living room, I sprung towards the door, only to have someone catch me and push me against the wall. 

I gasped, and the person turned on the light. Anti! 

No. It was Jack. He watched me carefully for a moment, and then lifted his eyebrows, finally changing his expression. 

"Y/N?"

"Jack! Thank god. Oh, thank god! Where did you go? Something VERY weird is happening, I -" 

"Tell me about it," he remarked dryly and let go of me. He took a step back and nodded towards the door, as someone was coming in. 

My breath stopped. I watched as she stood there. As I stood there. We - me, I... Completely lost, I looked at Jack. 

"How are there two of me, Jack?" 

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Hiiiii!!!! I missed all of you so much! It's always lovely to read your comments and I noticed some people were still enjoying Revenge, so as I promised, I'm continuing it! :) 

All my love, 

Andrea