Only You

chapter 23

Seyi's pov

What did I just do? I said as i looked up to him.

It was like the spirit that possessed me sudden left and I could finally think.

I got no answer from Ray but more of a look.

He was definitely worried.

Did I just single-handedly destroy the best thing that has ever happened to me?

My head was all over the place,all I could see was her face.

Her face was filled with hurt.

I can't believe I did that.

I hurt her first. It dawned on me.

I hurt her even before they  had the chance to.

I'm supposed to be protecting her damit!!

Now she's all alone with this mess to deal with.

What was I thinking?

She chose to stay with me even after seeing just how bad things were and what did I do?

I pushed her away.

I pushed away the only girl I have ever truly loved.

Shit! Shit! Shit! My head screamed.

"She went out crying man" Ray finally spoke

"You said you loved her,so what did you do that for?" Ray continued

I have nothing to say.

Saying I wanted to protect her by hurting her was the most stupid thing I could alter.

I have never been of the school of thought that if you love someone you'll let them go.

So what the hell did I just pull?

"You have to do something now, before things get worse" he continued

Do something?

What can I do?

I freaking told her I cheated, out of everything I could have said,I chose the one thing I knew would break her.

"There's nothing that can be done. She won't forgive me" I said weakly

"How in the hell do you know that?" He shouted

I didn't reply.

"Answer you  jerk" he said with annoyance

I didn't move my lips.

He was about to say something when I interrupted "Cause I can't forgive me" I said in a defeated tone.

"Good thing she isn't you then" Ray replied sarcastically

"Right" I said to myself.

"What are you still doing on the floor!? Go after her!!" he said frustrated

"I can't" I replied while staring at the floor

I could feel the hard glare Ray was directing at me but I wasn't bothered.

"You can't?" He said like he couldn't believe me

He took a deep breathe and said
"Okay fine, why not?"

I looked at him and said "I can't look her in the face after what I just said to her. I just can't. I don't want to hear her say she hates me. I don't want her to end us. I can't go through that. I just can't"

"Man... are you selfish,what kind of messed up reason is that?" Ray said with anger

"I'm scared" I said weakly