Ruki's Guide to Love and Fear (A JO1/Shiroiwa Ruki Fanfic)

Chapter 12

At long last, Ruki had begrudgingly admitted to himself that he did, in fact, like Ito Momoko. Of course, he had liked girls in the past, but he hadn't really liked anyone in the past two years or so, mainly because he had been busy focusing on becoming an idol. He simply didn't have time to fall in love. 

A week passed since his day out with Momoko in what seemed like a flash. The excitement surrounding his flagrant disregard for rules died down. Their manager no longer seemed to be breathing down Ruki's neck although Ruki was still on strict orders not to go anywhere himself or to see Momoko. 

Initially, the other members had been very curious about Ruki's situation even after it had been confirmed that Ruki had been out with a girl at an amusement park and club and had been chased and photographed by paparazzi. However, Ruki had kept silent about the details, much to Junki's and Keigo's disappointment, as they both were always looking for something new to entertain themselves. 

Ruki himself was torn about how he should act at the company building. On the one hand, every time they went there, he was itching to escape into the building to catch a glimpse of Momoko if she happened to be there. On the other hand, he felt he probably shouldn't bother Momoko knowing that she was with Toyama, and he technically wasn't supposed to be talking to her at all. His indecision about how to act ultimately made him feel constantly unfocused and jumpy whenever JO1 had something to do at the company building. 

The only tangible reminder that remained of Ruki's day out with Momoko was the black shirt and coat that Momoko had lent him. The two articles of clothing (which he had washed and folded neatly) lay on top of his dresser, constantly reminding him that, at some point, he needed to return them to Momoko. 

Some days he was tempted to just grab the clothes and make a run for the restaurant, but he wasn't sure he would be able to make it out of the apartment without getting confronted. Other days he wanted to stuff the clothes in his bag to take with him to the company building, but there was no guarantee that Momoko would even be at the company building on the same days or times that he was. In addition, he knew that the other members would probably catch him with the extra articles of clothing, and that would make him look even more suspicious. 

In the end, the clothes remained a guest in his room, sometimes making him smile and sometimes making him pace around his room in frustration. He resolved that he would return the clothes to Momoko, but only after he was off the company's radar again. The first chance he got to leave the apartment alone, he promised that he would go to Momoko's house. 

Another week passed and their manager announced that Lapone would be holding a company party. "I'm expecting all of you to be on your best behavior," their manager affirmed, making a point to narrow his eyes at Shion and Keigo. "The board directors will be there, so I hope you can all show that they've invested their money well. The new label members will also be there, so make sure you are also friendly and welcoming." 

Ruki's thoughts immediately went to Momoko. She's definitely going to be there. The thought made his heart beat in anticipation, but, of course, then he remembered Toyama, and bitterness colored his emotions.   

******

On the day of the party, JO1 arrived at the restaurant that Lapone had rented a room out just for the event. Ruki saw that Momoko had already arrived and was sitting next to Toyama, far away from JO1. He scowled as he watched Toyama slip his arm around Momoko's shoulders. 

When the alcohol finally arrived, Ruki gulped down several shots in quick succession. Mame, who was seated to Ruki's left, gave Ruki an alarmed look. 

"Are you okay, Ruki?" Mame whispered. 

Pursing his lips, Ruki replied, "I'm just perfect." He could already tell that his sight was blurring, but he didn't care enough to stop drinking.