Magic Madness™️

Chapter Eleven: "Relationship Problems"

Word Count: 2,356

Everything was real. The game was real. The trees were real. Joan was real. Evalyn and Amber were real. The creek was real. The evil royal family was real. Elijah had accepted those facts, by now.
Despite that, he was still unhappy. Without a phone or music or friends (other than Alex), Elijah found himself with too much time to think. He had too much time to reflect on himself and dwell on the past. He was unhappy, he knew, but then he came to the conclusion that he was unhappy before he got sucked into a video game, and then he dwelled on that fact and counterproductively became more unhappy. It was a devastating loop.

Elijah stared blankly out at the creek he had been visiting so frequently, expressionless, as he thought of home. He wanted it to make him feel warm and fuzzy and make him want to go back, but it didn't do anything besides remind him he wasn't there. He convinced himself it was because he had been away for too long.

He wasn't mad at himself, just disappointed. He didn't want to stay here, even if he had superpowers that he would probably kill for, in the real world. For some reason, though, because he had to have them here, his powers felt fake and like they weren't his. It was just programming. A bunch of ones and zeros. He told himself that everything would be better at home, but what was at home? A dog, parents, a bed, school, and a few friends? It should sound amazing, but it didn't. It sounded...average. And boring. Whichever world Elijah thought about, he felt ungrateful, but nonetheless unhappy. He didn't find comfort in the thought of home, and the lack of comfort made him uneasy.

"I had a feeling I'd find you here."
Elijah's head snapped up, and he blinked a few times. He only looked surprised for a moment before he slouched again and turned his focus back to the water.
"Hey," he replied gloomily.
"Why so angsty?" Alex asked jokingly, taking a seat next to Elijah, on the small bridge. Eli didn't laugh. Alex corrected himself, clearing his throat.
"Everything alright?" Alex was more genuine, that time. Still, he didn't get much of a reaction.
"I guess so," Eli shrugged.
"So that's a no, then. What's up?" Alex asked, crossing his legs, trying to figure out what Elijah might be thinking. Elijah shrugged again, and Alex rolled his eyes.
"You gotta give me something to work with, man," Alex insisted. Elijah sighed heavily, turning to face Alex.
"Look. I'm just-I'm upset."
"Clearly."
"Shut up, I wasn't finished," Eli took a deep breath, trying not to get angry, "I'm upset because I don't wanna be here, and I don't wanna go home, and it seems like there's no way to win. Both ways, I'm not gonna be happy. I'm not happy here, I'm not happy there, and I know there's no inbetween. I don't wanna die, but I don't wanna exist. I just want to not be here for awhile. I want to not be anywhere for awhile. I want to take a break without doing anything, or thinking. I can't stop thinking. I can't focus on anything. I don't have my meds, so for the first time in awhile, I really can't control how I think or when I think and it's driving me crazy. When I don't want to think, I can't stop thinking, and when I want to think, I space out! It's not fair. I know I sound childish, but it's not. Having ADHD sucks sometimes, as it is, but in a completely new space with way too much time to think and no meds, it's just-...It's really hard to deal with. All I want is some quiet, but as soon as I go somewhere that's quiet, my brain decides to think so much that I can't even process a thought before it's gone, and another one is in. I don't know what to do with myself."
Elijah didn't actually look up at Alex until he was done talking.

Elijah had what Alex liked to call "chameleon eyes." He had the kind of eyes that changed depending on what color shirt he was wearing or the lighting in the room. Usually, they were some shade of green or hazel or (occasionally) blue. When Eli looked up and made eye contact, Alex was only slightly upset that his eyes looked a melancholy shade of gray.

"I'm sorry," was all Alejandro could think to say.
"It's not your fault," Elijah looked away, again.
"That doesn't mean I can't be sorry," Alex said, followed by a pause. Neither of them were sure what else to say. Elijah's shoulders were tense, and he was slouched in a sort of defensive way.
Alex opened his arms. Eli shook his head.
"Alright, then," Alex mumbled, standing up. Clearly, Elijah didn't want any sort of comfort Alex had to offer.
Just as he started to walk away, he felt Elijah pull his arm back. He spun around to be met with a hug, and he smiled as he returned it.