TW and A/N: Major character death. Your heart belongs to me now. Go back to crying. Also, Race and Spot are like late teens/early 20's at this point. And it's a modern AU. Byeee.
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Hey, you've reached Racetrack. Or Racer. Or Antonio, yes mom I'm not dead and I love you. If you're Jack, then stop calling me and let me and Spot have some peace and quiet. And if you're Spot, then I love you and I may have forgotten to turn the oven off. Love you!
February 23rd 2017, 11:56pm.
Just storm out of the fucking house then why don't you! And don't answer any of my calls! It's fine Race, run from me all you want. I won't be there when you want me back. I hate you and i never want to see you again!
February 24th 2017, 1:37am.
Hey Racer it's me, Spot. I'm sorry about our fight before. I still love you and I didn't mean what I said. Please get back to me soon. I love you.
February 24th 2017, 2:04am.
Race, are you with Jack? Please, I need you to answer. I'm worried about you, babe.
February 24th 2017, 2:08am.
I just got off the phone with Jack, and with Albert. Where are you Racer? I'm really scared now. Just, text me please. Anything.
February 24th 2017, 2:12am.
Race for gods sake this isn't funny anymore. You gotta answer me, or at least someone. We are all worried sick.
February 25th 2017, 1:33pm.
I guess they still ain't found you... I've been doing a lot of crying race. Please come back home baby. I promise I didn't mean what I said to you that night. I promise with my whole heart Racetrack.
February 27th 2017, 4:21pm.
Race! I just got off the phone, they found you! I'm coming down to the police station to get you. God, you don't know how worried I've been.
March 6th 2017, 7:47pm.
We just got back from seeing you. Well, there was a box in the way. Racer I'm so sorry... I hope they treat you nice up there, even though you've got a smart mouth and it would get you in trouble back when we were at school. Jackie boy wanted to speak to me, but I didn't let him. I ain't let no one in the apartment and I've spent a lot of time in your room. It's just the way it was. God, Racer I miss you so much. I just wanna hug you one last time.
March 23rd 2017, 8:20am.
It's been a month, Racer... Jack said he's coming round today, and so is Albert. They need to bring me groceries because I ain't left this place since I said goodbye to you. I miss you more and more each day and I wish I hadn't lost my temper that night. I wish I hadn't of told you that I didn't love you because I do. And I've never stopped loving you. Ever. And I never will.
March 27th 2017, 2:54pm.
Hey Race. Jack was over again this morning. He told me that I should go see a therapist. I don't wanna see no shrink, but I ain't getting better either. He said that he found this really good lady who can help me a lot. I know exactly what you'd tell me to do. You always knew what to say... I'm sorry, my love.
March 30th 2017, 7:31pm.
I told her everything. The shrink. I showed her the picture of me and you at prom together. It felt really good Race to just tell someone everything. I know I can always tell Jack or any of the boys, but it ain't the same. She won't judge me or tell anyone else. She reminds me of you... Sorry for doing this to you... I d-didn't mean i-it...
April 1st 2017, 3:49am.
Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to y-you... Fuck, Race I cant do this without you. That last argument is the only thing I can think of now. The way you were crying, and I was shouting... I never meant any of it, I pinky swear. Please tell me this is all just an April Fools joke and you're gonna come home today after going on a vacation or something. I need you back in my life, Racetrack. Without you I ain't living. God, I'm hardly surviving. I hate myself more and more each day because I did this to you. If it wasn't for that argument then you would still be here and I would be able to hear you laugh one more time. Kiss your lips again. Just even see your beautiful smiling face. I miss you Antonio. I'll never stop apologising for doing this to you.
April 19th 2017, 6:14pm.
I don't know how much longer I can do this Tony. I do these just so I can hear your voice play that message at the beginning of each of these because I miss you so god damn much. I miss your blonde curls and they way you made me feel when you'd fall asleep on my chest and look all cutesy wrapped up in my arms and a blanket... Jack told me to stop calling you a while ago. He said that I wouldn't be able to cope if I kept on trying to call you, but I didn't listen. I told that lady too, the shrink, and she wants me to stop too. I love you and miss you more and more each day. I wanna get better because the amount that I'm missing you right now is driving me crazy. I regret everything I did that night. Sorry doesn't bring you back though. I wish it did.
February 23rd 2018, 9:26pm.
It's been one year since the biggest mistake of my life. Letting you go. I'm getting better. But it still hurts like a bitch every time I think about the things I said. I'm so sorry, but at least now I could hear that goofy voice of yours again. I will never stop missing you. I love you. I will always be yours. Always.
