Shattered [On Hold]

03. Emotions & Decisions

- Logan -

"You look like shit." I glare at Jace as he sits down beside me on the couch.

I don't reply. I know I look like shit. Hell, I think I look worse than shit. But he doesn't need to point it out.

We sit in silence beside each other. I wonder how long it will take for Jace to notice that something has happened.

"Okay, tell me. What's the matter?" he asks with a somber face. Figures...It only took him a couple of minutes to know that something's wrong.

Oh, nothing. Just saw my once best friend who was also the girl I fell for in high school after six years and now she's got a family of her own. And guess what? Apparently, I'm still not over her.

"Nothing," I say.

"It's about her, isn't it?" he asks.

I don't reply.

"It is about her," he says. "You have that expression, you know. The one you have whenever you're thinking about her. You can't hide anything from me, Logan."

I sigh. All through the drive back to the hotel from the hospital, I was riding through different waves of emotion. The first wave to hit me was sadness. I was so hopeless. It felt like all those years back when I realized that I'd have to leave Kady and everyone I love behind. The second was shock and realization. I still feel the same way about Kady. Even after all these years, even after all the things I went through, my feelings for her hadn't changed a bit. The final wave, the strongest and the most destructive one, was anger. I was furious. Furious at myself. Furious at Kady. Furious at my damn luck. Furious at every fucking thing in the world. I went out for a run as soon as I reached the hotel. I ran until I exhausted myself so much that I couldn't stand on my feet any longer. After that, I was ready to forget about everything.

"Logan."

I look up at Jace as he calls my name with such gravity.

"Tell me what the fuck happened, I'm losing my patience."

I sigh. Jace already knows all that happened with me. He's always been there to help. Even in my darkest times, he was always there beside me, reminding me that there was still hope. He helped through everything in the last few years when there was no one with me.

"I saw Kady today. She's in Denver," I say.

"What?"

"I saw Kady in the hospital today in the morning when I went for a check-up."

A big smile breaks on his face. "This is a great chance for you, dude! You can talk to her. Your tumor is long gone. You can finally be with her."

"I can't." I shake my head. "She is happily married and already pregnant."

"What?" The smile slips off his face.

"She already has a son and another coming on the way."

"You're shitting me."

"I wish I was."

"Wait a minute. How do you know that she's married? Did you talk to her?"

"No. But she was with her son and she was also wearing a ring."

"But...Just because a girl is wearing a ring doesn't mean that she is married," Jace says. "And that child could be her cousin or nephew or...wait. Did she look pregnant?" Jace motions his hands in a way that indicates an imaginary pregnant belly.

"No." I shake my head.

I figured that she must not be at that stage yet. With the way she was behaving, I think she got to know about it today herself.

"You lose all your brain cells when it comes to her," Jace mutters.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that Kady might not be married or pregnant."

Could that be true? Yes, it could be. It could be very much true. Jace is right. I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions.

I look at Jace, "You're right. I should've talked to her."

"Where are you going now?" Jace asks when I stand up.

"Don't disturb me," I warn Jace and go into the bedroom. I sit on the edge of the bed and take out my phone to contact the person I think must still be in contact with Kady.

"Hi, Mason." I greet Mason when he picks up.

"Logan? Is that you?" Mason asks.

"Yeah, it's me. How's it going?"

"Man, it's been so long! I thought you'd have forgotten all about me by now."

"How can I forget about you, Mase?"

"So...Why call all of a sudden after all this time?"

"Why? Can't I call my childhood friend to see how he's doing?"

"Logan, the last time you talked to me was more than a year ago."

I sigh and put my elbows on my knees. Well, what could I say to him? It is true. But what could I do? It was just that my career kick-started two years ago and I've been just getting busier and busier by the day. Mason was the only friend from my childhood with whom I was still in contact with. The calls kept getting less frequent as the days passed, until one day they just stopped completely.

"Okay, I... I need to talk to Kady. You're still in contact with her, aren't you?" I decide to get straight to the point.

"Well, I lost contact with her two years ago. The last time I heard about her, she had shifted to Denver and was working at a salon."

"Do you know the name of the salon?" I ask Mason, hoping she still works at the same place.

After learning the name of the salon, I end the call and go out into the living room to find Jace slumbering on the couch. I decide to leave him the way he is and grabbing my car keys, head towards the door.

After fifteen minutes, I'm standing outside the salon in which Kady works, looking in through the big glass window beside the door. The salon is a wide open space with numerous mirrors and leather chairs. The walls are a brilliant white color and the floor is made up of smooth, deep brown planks.

Not at all the place I imagined Kady to work at.

When I got to know that she works in a salon, I imagined her working in a punk salon with dark walls and spray-painted graffiti.

Before wasting any more time, I take a deep breath and open the door to step inside.

I look around, trying to find Kady in the crowded salon. I find her at the other end of the salon, giving someone a haircut. At least she still works in the same place.

My heartbeat increases as I make my way towards her. People were chattering away but I couldn't hear anything except the loud thumping of my heart. I stop a few feet away from her.

I raise my hand and tap her shoulder. She turns around. The moment she saw my face, her eyes widen and her mouth opens a little. Well, she clearly remembers me. She blinks her eyes twice and then stares at me.

After a couple of seconds she breathes, "Logan."

***

A/N:

Thank you so much for all the votes and comments! They make my day! I'm so sorry for updating so slowly. As I said, I'm very busy these days. I'll try to update the next chapter as soon as possible.

Don't forget to vote! :)