Journey For Trust (Vigilante Deku)

Chapter Four: Sludge Villain

After the news report of him finished, he bought some materials for his new "vigilante" ideas. But as soon as he left the last store, he didn't know where to go, what to do, or even what to feel. His legs wandered aimlessly through the streets of Japan. Dread coiled in the pit of his empty stomach, mercilessly taunting him. If that really was Endeavor's daughter, then that would be it for him, right? Endeavor would certainly not give Izuku even a hint of leniency. If it came to being caught by Endeavor, Izuku couldn't decide between getting beaten to a pulp and then sent to prison, or being forcefully recruited by him would be better. Frightful tears blurred the corners of his vision. Would it be easier if he just turned himself in?

Izuku forcefully smacked his freckled cheeks. If he was going to be caught, he wouldn't go down without trying! "Ow, ow, ow..." Though he instantly regretted encouraging himself like that, as throbbing pain emanated from his cheekbones to all throughout his eye sockets. Plus, all Fuyumi would know about him was that he was a teenage boy. Not his exact age, so the police can't target his specific grade level. Only Shuzenji knew his exact age, and even then she didn't know his real name. Although, she did know what his face looked like. But, thankfully, she wouldn't betray him like that. Right?

Subconsciously, Izuku found himself walking towards her house. Maybe she could do something to help him with his eyes. Suddenly, he stopped. Did he even have the right to ask her for help? Was she trying to send him a message to leave her alone last night? His journal slipped out of his grasp. Did his only friend hate him...? Was she even his friend in the first place...? He annoyed her. He asked for her help too much. He didn't deserve her. He didn't deserve friends. He didn't deserve the little that he had.

His chest weighed down with guilt and regret. Damnit, why couldn't he have just learned his lesson with Kacchan? Now he's just gone and annoyed someone else. Tears he desperately fought back finally started flowing from his bruised eyes, mixed with occasional heavier, red ones. Did she feel... used? Tightly filling his lungs with air, he reached down to pick up his notebook and gently rubbed his arm on his face in an attempt to dry his cheeks. He should at the least apologize, and then he'd leave her alone for good this time.

-

Standing at Yui's porch, he reached his hand up and knocked on the door. He held his breath, wishing for time to stop. As if somehow, if he kept the air inside him, he wouldn't have to face Yui. But, just like many other times, his hope is diminished as the door swung open. Izuku swore he saw tears of anger in her eyes when they met with his. They widened, most likely at the sight of him. "What?" It was a short word, but the accidental tone sent a message that spoke many things Izuku wanted to deny. What he begged to not be true.

"I- uh, j-just wanted to- um... I'm sorry-"
"You need to go."
"B-but... I just w-want to say-"
"Now."

The door slams shut. He doesn't react, he just stands there. Nothing. His mind scraped of any emotion. But all too soon, an emotion different from fear, guilt, desperation, and anxiety slowly seeped into him. One he was all too familiar of. One he was all too scared of. Pain. Suddenly, all of his other emotions flooded into him. May it be to push the other away, or may it be to play with him, he didn't know. All he knew in that moment was that he wanted to disappear into thin air.

-

Izuku forcefully shut the door to his room, throwing the backpack on the floor. He cupped his hands over his mouth in an attempt to dull his harsh sobs, though to no avail. Everything was his fault. He slid down to the floor beside his door, tightly wrapping his arms around himself and brought his knees up to his chin.

Izuku always hated this- the moment when the monster you've been running from crashes into you.

Izuku harshly bit his bottom lip.