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Wayda
Today was a day that I was dreading for the past 2weeks. Yep it's my cousin Meka's funeral. When my cousin died it was a huge shock to me. I was hurt asf because it was so sudden.
She wasn't sick or anything. One day she just fell out and never came back. When I got the call that we lost her I was honestly in complete disbelief. We weren't inseparably close but every time I go to my daddy's town her house would be my first stop. Her mom was my favorite aunt. Meka was young as hell when she died as well. She was 25 years old.
When I got the date of the funeral I requested the time off to drive down state to my dad's house for the funeral but now it's the day and I'm not sure if I even wanted to go. From the first day I have been battling myself with this question. I didn't even buy a dress for the funeral until yesterday. It's not something I'm up for.
I sat in the front of the mirror putting on make up deciding if I actually wanted to go. What have me confused is I don't know if I could deal with seeing her lifeless body being dropped down into a 6ft hole but on the other hand it's gonna be my last time seeing her.
Fuck it my mind was made up. I'm not going. Sorry Meka but I can't do it. She won't be able to know that I'm not there anyway. I'll send my love to her moms house tomorrow. I went head first back into my bed at my daddy's house.
*** That night
My phone was ringing like crazy for the past 30minutes I didn't bother to pick it up or look at the callers ID because I already knew it was my cousins. My phone rang one last time and I finally answered.
" Yo". I spoke into to the phone. " you come down here and don't let nobody see you?" Ariel spoke. " My bad". I sighed " look everyone headed by Aunt Nika's house". " I'll meet y'all there".
The fact that all the funeral business was over I was glad and didn't mind seeing my family. I was happy too see them actually but I know I'll be scolded for not coming to the funeral or grave yard earlier. I haven't even seen my dad from he left the house today.
Making my way out of bed I thought of what I was gonna wear. Since I hadn't seen my family in a while I wasn't coming half stepping cause I know they weren't either. It took about 2 hours for me to get fully dressed with lite makeup and all.
Once I was done I made my way out the house and headed by Aunt Nika's. Not sure if I was nervous because it's been a while since I have seen my family or because I missed the whole day.
I pulled up to my aunty's house and parked. Getting out everyone was looking at me surprised to see me. I waved at everyone the whole way until I got inside.
The whole family was here. " my babyyyy". Aunty Nika got up from her seat next to my dad and hugged me. " hey aunty". I smiled. " why didn't I see you earlier". She frowned. I played with my feet. "I don't know aunty". Playing crazy was always my first reaction to everything. " where Ariel". I said looking around. " she in the back with the rest of her no good cousins". She said and everyone laughed.
