Dean X Reader Imagines 2

Late (Dean X Reader)

One more case was done and we just got back in the bunker. "I'm exhausted" I say as I let my bag down
"I'm gonna go for a shower and I think I'm gonna head out" Dean says
"Ok, I'm going to leave now before this conversation goes into deeper details" I say
"I always go deep" he says with a smirk and I pretend to be throw up. He chuckles and goes inside. And that I think, sums up our relationship. Our FRIENDLY relationship in which we both teased each other a little bit. He has been dating Lisa for almost a year now and the truth is that I have gotten used to not someone worth that kind of attention from him. I have been hoarding feelings for him for so long that now I learnt how to keep them just to myself even when they threaten to come to the surface sometimes. This is probably my fault though because I was a coward. I had many times to tell him that I'm in love with him even before Lisa but I was too scared to do it. Now it's too late to do anything.

"Hey, you ok?" Sam asks as he sees me in the hallway
"Yeah. I'm gonna go have a shower and go get some rest" I say
"I think I'm gonna go make something to eat. Do you want me to make you something?" he asks
"No, thank you" I say and I keep walking to my room. He knows how I feel about his brother and he has tried many times to incourage me to talk to him but I keep saying no. I don't want to risk losing even that kind of relatioship with Dean because if I admit my feelings to him and he doesn't feel the same, everything will get 100 times more awkward and eventually tear us apart. I have already lost enough on this job to know better than risk losing the last people - family - that I have left.

After the shower, I went back to my room and decided that I'm too lazy to blowdry my hair. Instead I just took the towel off and sat on my bed with my laptop. But a few minutes later there was a knock on my door. "Come in" I say without taking my eyes away from my laptop. The door opens and immediately Dean's cologne hit me "How many bottles of cologne did you go through?" I ask and he chuckles
"You think it's too much?" he asks closing the door
"Doesn't the fact that I smelled it from here answer your question?" I ask and he nods. "You know that's why girls act stupid around some men. We breath in and because of the amount of cologne we inhale, there is not enough oxygen to go to the brain" I say while he walks to me
"Wow, did that might actually make sense?" he asks and I chuckle
"Anyway, what do you need?" I ask closing my laptop
"To ask you something. Do you think that a person with our life could also have a normal life? Like balance the two parts?" he asks
"Are we talking about you and Lisa?" I ask
"It's just a thought I had for a few days now. It's just a question" he says
"Oh my God, you're in love with her" I say doing my best not let my feelings for him to get in the way right now even though saying that rip me. "I don't think that I'm the best person you should ask for dating advise" I say
"It's not dating advise. I'm just asking for your opinion" he says.

"Look, I want you to be happy. You deserve that. And I think that you should do what will make you happy. Sometimes it may not work out but life is short and you should make the best of it" I say
"Are you sure about that?" he asks
"Yeah, you should go for it. Give it a try" I say
"Thank you. I appreciate it" he says
"Anytime" I say.
"I need to be going now. Do you need me to bring you anything from outside?" he asks
"No, thanks. Have fun" I say and he leaves my room. I waited for him to leave and as soon as I heard the front close, I grabbed my laptop, because it is the closest thing to me at this moment, and I throw on the wall with all my force. Sam's immediately runs inside my room
"What was that? Are you ok?" he asks
"Yes, I'm ok" I say calmly and I walk out of the room "I'll clean it up later" I say while walking.

I go to the kitchen and I find a bottle of votka. "Don't we have more alcohol in this place?" I ask as I notice that that is the last bottle in the cabinet "Of cource not because Dean lives here" I whisper to myself
"What did he do?" Sam asks
"Nothing, I'm fine" I say and I start drinking from the bottle
"Woah woah, take it easy" Sam says taking it from my hands "What happened?" he asks and I go and sit down
"He's in love" I say with tears in my eyes "He's in love and I'm in love but... Do you know how it's like being in love with someone that is in love with someone else?" I ask and I wipe the tear that rolled down my cheek. "He came in my room asking for dating advise. He can be so stupid sometimes! And I hate him so much right now but I love him and I can't really hate him" I say and I cover my face with my hands. Sam sits next to me and pours votka in a glass for me. "Thanks" I say and I drink it immediately.