The Alpha and I (Book 1)

40. Alpha Ash

'If I die young' by The Band Perry, played as we all entered the hall.

People were already crying and although I wasn't on the outside, on the inside I was shattered.

The service started and eulogies were read, memories were shared and goodbyes were said. I felt distant during the whole ordeal, if I focussed too much I knew I'd break down and my pack didn't need to see me in that state. I was an Alpha, I should show pain and sorrow but not that openly or I would seem weak.

'More then life' by Whitley came on. I took a deep breath and when the song ended I got up to say a few words to my mourning pack, my voice broke a couple of times but I made it through and exited the hall without breaking down.

After the formalities I made my way to the pack hospital to check on those still being cared for there. It would get me away from the wake for a while and then I could go home and mourn by myself.

I spoke to them and kept them company like I did regularly, I got to the last room and sat in a chair, she hadn't woken up yet but this is where I found most peaceful. I didn't have to deal with any looks of pity or worry here, I could just rest and let the heart monitors beeping lull me into sleep.

A few hours later I was woken when doctors and nurses came rushing into the room, the beeping on the monitor was all over the place! "What's going on?" I asked, nothing had changed with her since she was brought here but now something was happening.

"I'm sorry Alpha but we can't say anything yet but we do need the room." He said, I got the hint and left. I needed to know what was going on though so I waited in the waiting room for someone to update me.

"ALPHA SHE IS AWAKE!!" The nurse came running down the hallway. Excited I ran and met her half way, "it's too early to say if there's any permanent damage or memory loss but she's awake!" She screeched, "she still has the feeding tubes in so can't talk but she can nod and shake her head and use all her limbs!"

"That's fantastic! Can I go back in?"

"Of course Alpha."

"Thanks" I went back into the room, her eyes widened at the sight of me. "Hello, it's ok, you're safe here! Welcome back to the land of the living!" I joke. I can see her mouth twitch in an attempt to smile.

I went back to relaxing by her bedside, reading things to her and making jokes. She seemed ok to me, we would find out tomorrow though when they took the tubes out.